Part 56: Episode XLVIII: Look Into My Eyes
Rides ze Shoopuf?
Following the silly aquatic Al Bhed Ninja attack incident we are unceremoniously dumped on the opposite shore by another rest area.
Unfortunately we cannot quite leave yet as Yuna’s celebrity status has garnered another large crowd and Yuna is too nice to ever tell the paparazzi to piss off. So there is little to do around here until that business sorts itself out.
We can head to the next screen over where Auron will tell Tidus to do his goddamn job. But of course that will not advance the plot. Instead Tidus needs to ignore everyone and take off down the path toward Guadosalam on his own. Why, you ask?
Why to poke a fresh Al Bhed corpse with a stick, of course. Or at least hide the body before Wakka happens along and ties it neck first from a tree as a warning to other filthy Al Bhed in the area.
Evidentially not. This is weird seeing as we saw that underwater Al Bhed machina clearly explode violently no doubt shredding anyone inside instantly. But details…
You know where we haven’t travelled to in a while? Asian Stunt Double FMV Land.
”…I have no idea what is happening. Other than it is awesome…”
”Tch…! The heck kinda underwear is that? I’ve seen hotter granny panties. Man nothing ever goes right in Spira!”
New Music: Rikku’s Theme
“Heeeeey! You're okay! How you been?"
*shakes head* "Terrible!"
"Yeah, you don't look so good. What happened?"
"Huh… Oh! That machina... That was you?"
*nods head* “Mmm-hmm.”
Rikku climbs to her feet…
"W-Wait! But you attacked us!"
"Nuh-uh. It's not exactly what you think."
”You shot fireballs at us!”
“That was self-defense.”
“You were gonna drop depth charges on us too! I saw that screen prompt about readying them.”
“…Well. I didn’t even get to use that! So it doesn’t co—”
"Yo!"
Wakka and the rest of the party wander over…
"Uh, you could say that."
"Yuna, Lulu... I told you about her, remember? She was the one who helped me before I was washed up on Besaid! She's an Al Bhe...beh..."
”…ther. She’s all better! Yeah! I thought she was a goner after Sin attacked. Yeah that’s the ticket!”
“Ah!”
“Oh…”
"Wow, so you, like, owe her your life! What luck meeting here, ya?”
*blitzball prayer* “Praise be to Yevon!”
“…” *scratches head*
“So, uh... Rikku... You look a little beat up. You okay?"
"Uh, Wakka..."
”Psst… Is he… Is he being coy or is he really not putting together the dots here…?”
“I’ve been traveling with this guy for a couple weeks. Coy isn’t something in his vocabulary…”
"There's something we need to discuss."
"Oh, go ahead."
Rikku walks over…
"Right. Sorry, Wakka."
“What… Huh?! Ah…”
Welp. The usual Final Fantasy playable female character trifecta of the main chick, the older mature one, and the jailbait
I wonder if Auron ever gets tired of Yuna asking his permission for everything like the group’s dad.
“Huh?”
“Look at me.”
"Oh, okay…"
“As I thought.”
Gah! Seek the nearest Yevon approved optometrist stat. Something is seriously fucked with your eyes, kid!
"Are you certain?"
"A hundred percent!” *smile*
“Can I…?”
"If Yuna wishes it."
"Yes, I do."
"Rikku's a good girl. She helped me a bunch!"
*nods* “Mmm-hmm!”
”…But now that I’m thinking about it… can we stop for lunch? I haven’t had a meal in like a week!”
"Well, I'm for it! The more, the merrier!"
”Hey why’d I get the runaround for days about the whole guardian thing and she gets to join in like ten minutes?”
“She didn’t present herself as a lunatic from the sea claiming to be from a 1000 year old dead city.”
“Ah… Oh…”
“It was strange. Even though Wakka had always hated the Al Bhed...”
"Rikku, at your service!"
“He never realized Rikku was one of them.”
Bwahaha! Wakka is a racist fuck that has absolutely no idea what Al Bhed actually look like beyond jerks with machines wearing goggles. That’s just rich. Hahaha. Ah…
In any case, Rikku is now officially our final party member in Yuna’s pilgrimage. Apparently Rikku has just been sitting around watch TV and sleeping in past noon every day as her stats haven’t budged an iota since we saw her last way back at the beginning of the game. I am not sure why they decided Rikku should begin with such piss poor health. Out of her first six or seven Sphere Grid nodes about five of them are +200 HP ones to bring her up to snuff.
Rikku’s weapon type are claws/punch dagger type deals and her armor is targes (read: tiny shields.) Not really much to be done about either piece of equipment as the world fails to stock or drop either item prior to Rikku joining. Funny how that works.
Now that our recruitment drive is all sorted out we may as well head off toward our next destina—
Oh wait. Nevermind. New character. Obviously time for another round of tutorials!
Normal Battle
“I wonder what's inside?"
Hey! I know it’s been about fifteen hours but do you remember Rikku can steal shit? Well Rikku can steal shit! Just in case you forgot they’ve taken it upon themselves to have two more tutorial pop-ups and add literal treasure chests to the random encounter mobs to pound it into your head.
Another critter in the jungle takes issue to Al Bhed thievery and attempts to kick Rikku’s ass for taking what isn’t hers. That treasure like belongs to the WOODS, man!
“I'm gonna use that item I just got on you! You'll be sorry!"
Our next tutorial is for Rikku’s Overdrive – Mix. Using her Al Bhed MacGyver skills to duct tape two stockable items into… SOMETHING! Unless you’ve got a guide open the result of the Mix won’t be known until the deal is already done. The game doesn’t remember the results of previous Mixings so… yeah it’s a good idea to have that guide open or jot down useful combos.
And when I say “stockable items” I mean literally ANYTHING outside equipment that is not a Key Item can be combined into a Mix. Healing items, Sphere Grid spheres, vendor trash for aeon abilities – anything.
Seriously, take a look. And don’t even attempt to puzzle out how Rikku can make a WW2 German hand grenade out of two rolled up maps.
With that in mind, the tutorial wants us to spend those two Bomb Cores we just nabbed from the treasure chest. The resulting Mix is Firestorm…
…an attack that hits six enemies (or in this case the one enemy six times) for medium strength Fire damage.
Needless to say, that is enough to do in the poor little 1,000 HP critter.
“Wh-What did you just do!?"
"I can combine items and use them like this. It's not that tough, really."
”Yeah? Think you could teach us how to do it?”
“Nope.”
“…”
And that about does it for Rikku tutorials and the Moonflow for that matter. It is just a short jog through the woods a couple screens before we reach the next milestone on our journey.
Next stop Seymour’s home turf. 98.6% chance of things getting creepy is in the forecast. Stay tuned…
Episode 48 Highlight Reel
Rikku Official Art
Rikku Portrait Art – Either that is some weird shading or the Al Bhed have some shitty dental care…