Part 78: Episode LXIX: Goodbye to My Home

Well then. I suppose standing around will do us no good. Especially because the only sound left is distant rumbling and the omnipresent “ITSANNOYINGHUH?” alarm of Home. We cannot get out of this Al Bhed trash heap soon enough.



Tidus has no real indication as to where he is to be heading at this point. But everyone else seemed to have come to a consensus to head this way during his Yuna sacrifice epiphany freak-out session and he probably feels he's taken enough of everyone's time at this juncture. We'll just continue along this ominous looking platform further into the crumbling wreckage of Home.



Meanwhile, on the bridge of the Normandy... Cid, Brother, and an anonymous Al Bhed red shirt who doesn't earn a proper name take up positions on the bridge. Well, the latter two do at least. Cid just runs around yelling at people.



[Hurry, hurry! You have one minute!]
[No, father. It is like two minutes and fifty seconds now.]
[Thirty seconds!]
[I... have the timer right here. It is two minutes and forty-five seconds.]
[No time to argue, boy! Six seconds remain!]
“...”



Tidus runs onto the bridge. The rest of the party sort of just materialize between camera cuts. Maybe I'm a bit too hard on Final Fantasy X's poor direction. It could be much, much worse. For instance, I watched Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within for the first time last week and *sound of a wet fart oozes out of mouth*



[Everyone alive!]
[...Who is this upset looking outsider stomping around the bridge? Should he be here...?]



“Answer me! Answer me, damn you!"

Tidus awkward lifts Cid up by his collar...



"I... I didn't know anything about what a summoner is... is supposed to do. And I told her all those things... without even knowing. I've got to tell her! I've got to tell her I'm sorry!"
"That's it? You're gonna tell her you're *sorry*? And then you just drag her to Zanarkand and make her fight Shin, huh?”
“...Shin?”
“Oh I'm sorry, did I misspeak? It's like I'm havin' a stressful goddamn day here and now some little punk is getting in my face about I don't even know what.”





Cid proceeds to DUNK Tidus for getting in his face and throwing a pity party.



“I'm... I'm not gonna let Yuna die!”
“Hah! Words! Show me action!”



”...”
“That's STILL words you damn fool, boy. Fine then...”
[Uhh... NOW it is one minute left...]



*nods*
“I'm gonna make you regret it.”
*fist pump* “I won't.”
”I ain't even playin' boy. You mess this up and the inside of a Guadosalam prison will look like a trip to the refreshments stand at the Luca Stadium compared to the world of hurt I'll put into your bleach blonde ass.”
“I... I got it.”
*walks up to the Galaxy Map* “So you know where she is?”
“'Course not. That's why we're gonna look!”



Oh yeah, by the way we are on an airship. What did you think we weren't going to reach a place with some actual technology and they weren't going to use it as an excuse to bust out an airship?



”I-Is that like a...? What is that...?”
“Oh, it's a boat with a lot of windows to keep it nice and breezy during the voyage.”
“Oh. That sounds pleasant, ya?”

The ship rumbles...

“What's that?!”
“The airship taking off.”
“Taking off?! But you just said...”
“I was being sarcastic. The rest of Spira still does sarcasm, right? Or did Yevon stick a stick too far up the lot of your asses? Dammit, Rikku. Where'd you find these people?”
“...”




New Music: Start





1000 Oaync Ujantia yd dra Sasuno Pyhg.





The Al Bhed planned ahead in case they would have to one-day bug out dramatically from Home in an airship. I mean granted if say... Sin rolled in and toppled down one of those towers within spitting distance of the airship hangar the wrong direction, this would be a very short, embarrassing launch. But, details...





The airship was actually ancient Zanarkand machina game show technology. You'd spin the giant wheel while flying over the city for big money and prizes. It was a real hit with the retiree crowd.







Behold Final Fantasy X's airship, The Fahrenheit. If you're thinking to yourself “boy the game is really going to start to open up now that the party reached an airship” like most every other previous Final Fantasy game then boy are you about to be disappointed!





”Pek Suhao! Pek Bnewac! E muja ed!”



Home has certainly seen better days. It's a shame we only got to see three hallways, a couple of warehouse chambers, and a trio of bed rooms in our visit there. But if you'd like to see more endless brown corridors, might I refer you to this little title called “Dirge of Cerberus”.







Some of the rampaging Guado summoned fiends are taking issue with the Al Bhed escape vehicle and begin to pursue. But we'll not be paying them much mind. I do have to question how the hell the Guado managed to trek across the desert in an isolated sub-continent well off the Spira mainland to mount this assault in the first place. Were they riding on this big dopey Zu monsters?



[It's a goddamn airship. Did you think it was going to start burrowin' through the sands?]
[I thought it would not start up at all. Or... just explode like the Kelvin.]
_{[Quiet about that! It's fine!]}
“Umm... Did he say something about expl—“
[Next, we use that!]
“...”
*frown* [Whatever you say.]




New Music: Song of Prayer ~ Al Bhed





The Al Bhed begin singing the Hymn of the Fayth chant together. Well, except for Rikku. She's throw the whole chorus off.





“How?!”
“With one of the forbidden machina!”
”It's this thing called a 'missila'. It's a type of missile. Only this baby ain't magic!”




Music: Hurry!!





Apparently the Al Bhed weren't entirely sure this millennium old vehicle was actually going to work. But that didn't stop them from loading it with enough ordinance to take out a major population center. Always be prepared, even if you're just winging it.





It stands to reason they've probably never actually fired this thing before as this is the inaugural flight of the Fahrenheit. So might as well go big or go home, ya?







And when I say “go big”, I of course mean...





...fuck it! Let's glass the whole desert! Suck it, Guado! Here's a Sending for ya!





Granted, maybe nuking Home while flying barely a mile away from it wasn't the soundest of strategies in the land. But you've got to learn somehow when it comes to re-unearthing atomic weapons.









Besides it's fine. Just a little bit of turbulence on the flight and the airship is no worse for wear. Didn't even scuff the fresh gaudy neon paint job they've done on the hull.



Cid is fucking stoked to have just performed the first successful nuclear detonation in 1,000 years on his people's former home and having turned the remaining Guado invaders into tree elf ashes. Others are less enthusiastic...



*sobs*
[No need for tears! What is good about machina, is they can be build anew, you see?]
[What about our homes?]
[That can be rebuilt too. I hear there's a looooot of fresh real estate that just opened up over by Guadosalam. Hah!]



*has lost interest and is out*
“Boom! Like happy festival fireworks, ya?"
"You can cram your happy festival, you big meanie!" *runs off*



And on that note, we'll take a break before Wakka sticks his foot so far down his mouth that Cid has to comes over and dunk him out an airlock to get it dislodged.






Video: Episode 69 Highlight Reel (Recommended Viewing)





Cid Portrait Concept Art



Cid Concept Art