Part 98: Episode LXXXVIII: Settle My Grudge

Music: People of the North Pole



”Maester Kelk promise Biran rend something asunder by day end. Biran rending will not be denied.”



”Maester Kelk promise Yenke can watch Biran rend infidel asunder. Yenke prove horn hardest!”



Alright... Let's try that again. Time for the solitary solo character boss gimmick since we've gotten a full party. Now, getting to this boss fight you might be worried because... well, it's Kimahri. He's hot garbage in a battle and there's a very good chance you may have never bothered to use him much at all beyond required segments of the game.



But worry not. The developers themselves seem to have known nobody used Kimahri. As such, Biran and Yenke here scale to Kimahri's stats. I've had Kimahri going down Rikku's path since before we even got Rikku, since stealing is useful and early game Kimahri is generally not. Let's take a look at how that effects these two numskulls.




So having Kimahri running down Rikku's path also had the benefit of making this duo pretty easy to deal with overall. I hope you weren't being a cheating jerk buffing Kimahri's stats to max with a Gameshark or something. If so, strap in for a half hour long fight as Bulk and Skull here will have millions of HP to burn through thanks to your lack of ethics.



One key component of this battle is that Yenke and Biran, being Ronso and all thus innate Blue Mages Ronso Rage users, are lousy with techniques that Kimahri can Lancet out of 'em if he'd missed any during the pilgrimage.

Yenke is sporting Fire, Stone, and Water Breath.



Biran has Doom and Self-Destruct on his roster of missable Ronso Rages. He also comes with a brand new Ronso Rage in Thrust Kick – a powerful physical Overdrive that makes Kimahri's Jump completely obsolete. As if anyone used Kimahri's Overdrives more than once in a blue moon. Yes, I'm sure you used them a bunch and think Kimahri is under rated, thread poster. Tell yourself whatever lies which help you sleep at night.



There is another benefit to having Kimahri traveled Rikku's path. Biran and Yenke are holding onto five Level 3 Keyspheres that can be pilfered during the course of this battle. I think we've had all of maybe one of 'em prior to this point. So making Kimahri into a woefully ineffective Thief/Blue Mage/Dragoon multi-class mess works to our benefit here.





Offensive wise, Yenke can use his Ronso Rages at any time to burp out a fireball or barf out enough water to keep a small village hydrated for a week. Thankfully, he keeps the Stone Breath locked away for this battle. That would be less than sporting.



Biran can cast Thunder and Blizzard as in some alternate party he'd been dabbling in the black mage's sphere grid but hadn't been leveled in ages as well. Since Kimahri's magic stats are garbage, so too is Biran's casting ability. Of course, these two knuckleheads can still pull off basic physical attacks that pack much more of a punch. But more likely, they'll perform the secondary gimmick of this battle...





Bulldoze is an attack both Yenke and Biran can perform wherein they perform a running clothesline physical attack against Kimahri and will shift their position on the battlefield. Yenke and Biran will usually take turns doing bulldoze and eventually return to being on the same side of the field.

There's no positional damage in Final Fantasy X. Back attacks do not exist so having Kimahri stuck in a pincer isn't any sort of a disadvantage. Indeed, it's more in Kimahri's favor that the two rival Ronso are separated.



That's because Biran and Yenke both have Auto-Guard and will tank any physical attacks for their partner while they're occupying the same part of the battlefield. Given Kimahri's lack of much in the way of magic, that's a touch problematic.



But, Auto-Guard doesn't work when there's nobody next to them to take a blow. Kind of a glaring flaw in their battle strategy. I'm starting to think Ronso are just a race of that movie version of the tall, muscle bound bouncer at clubs with the glass jaw. Ya know... except tribal cats.





Indeed, laying the damage while the two Ronso are apart is the best strategy in general. Once Biran drops to 25% HP he'll cast Mighty Guard. If he's with Biran when this occurs, his sidekick will also get the Mighty Guard as well. But if he's by his lonesome, there's only the one buffed Ronso to deal with here.



Most importantly, once Biran casts Mighty Guard, Kimahri can Lancet that sonuvabitch out of his rival Ronso and actually get a half-way useful Ronso Rage for a change. Except for the part where Mighty Guard casts on the active party and hahaha... Kimahri is never sticking around for more than a single turn during any fight that matters.





Likewise, when down to a quarter of his health, Yenke will cast White Wind healing him (and Biran if they're occupying the same side of the battlefield) for a good 1500+ HP. Mildly annoying, but thankfully he'll only do it the one time.



And again, a half-way decent spell for Kimahri to Lancet from Yenke after it's been cast. It's important to grab both of them before getting serious about knocking out one of these adversaries. As there is a final stage to the battle.









Eventually via Ronso Rages, physical attacks or... well hell, I just started tossing spare grenades I wasn't using since it was funny... one of the Ronso bosses will eventually fall. Likely Yenke, as he's a decent bit weaker than Biran, despite the guaranteed heal.



Upon his partner's defeat, Biran will get pissed and cast Berserk thus pounding Kimahri with strong physical attacks the rest of the fight. If Yenke outlives Biran, he'll cast Haste and do much the same. If either of the Ronso hadn't gotten to 25% health prior to the other taking a dirt nap, Kimahri will miss out on getting White Wind or Mighty Guard. Since they'll skip that step and go straight to the Beserked/Hasted phase.





In any case, considering neither of these guys can do much more than 300-600 HP of damage against my Kimahri and I've got 99 Hi-Potions and about 90 Al Bhed ones on reserve all healing for 1000 HP a turn and a Kimahri quick enough to do two items in a row at times... not much of a battle.







Good job Kimahri. You've avenged the bully Ronso that essentially ripped your dick off as a youngen. Now get back on the bench. See you for a token AP tag in the next boss battle.

Music ends...



”Kimahri prove strong Ronso. Kimahri make proud. Go prove Ronso clan ain't nothin' to fuck with.”

Biran climbs to his feet and looks toward Mt. Gagazet and begins shouting...



“I honor the name of the warrior who defeats Biran.”



”That K-I-M-A-H-R-I! Hard to spell Kimahri name right. No Ronso ever remember where 'h' supposed to go!”
"Mountain knows Kimahri strong. Kimahri may pass."
“Summoner."





"Truly?"
"Penance for breaking Kimahri's horn, long ago."
”Frankly, Ronso not entirely big on whole Yevon thing. Biran only join for tax break. Kimahri strong. Biran take Kimahri horn down from above turdydump spot.”
“No more turdydump to Kimahri horn. Kimahri want broken horn back?”
“No... Kimahri okay with Biran... Bury Kimahri horn with Mt. Gagazet...”
"We crush enemies following behind."
"Kimahri crush enemies standing before."
"You are most fortunate summoner."



"Ronso will shine your statue brightest."
”Biran will rend statue dirt asunder!”
"Thank you. But I fear that no one will make a statue for a traitor such as I am."



"Then Ronso will make!"
"With grand horn on head!"
"That... would be wonderful."
”...Not into that one bit.”

I'm sure there's fanart of a burly Ronso-Yuna statue. Probably naked. With the Ronso clan running a train on her because the internet is an awful place.





And the worst line read on all of Mt. Gagazet goes to the above line blurted out in about a quarter of a second. It's Narrator Tidus. There's not even any lip flaps to keep up with here, game. C'mon!



That's a wrap on the Ronso territory. Now it's onward to scaling the largest mountain in all of Spira. Should be no pro—



"What is it this time?"
”Kimahri already whipped your asses. We're not doing a full party brawl now where you're like powered up on Ronso steroids or some crap, alright? Not happening!”


New Music: Song of Prayer ~ Biran and Yenke







_{”This is super awkward. How long are they gonna go on for...?”
“I... don't know know. Just smile and listen. Maybe it'll stop.”
“Crud... Not likely... Look.”}


New Music: Song of Prayer ~ Ronso Tribe







Well, that was nice of the Ronso Tribe. Would have preferred some warm coats or blankets for the climb. But eh... you take what hospitality you can get at the north pole.






Video: Episode 88 Highlight Reel