The Let's Play Archive


by Drakyn

Part 16: Gondontology

Update 14: Gondontology
You can make your own Gond at home with nothing more than some baking soda and a spritz of vinegar.

Wow. Hey. Man.
Last time got a little intense. I mean, sure we'd spent millions of years exterminating the Devaloka, but to actually FINISH it? A bit weird. That's our first real conquest since... well. The Buelana.
Let's take stock.

16-ARK: Survival Evolved - Character Creation

First, we can make yet another obsolete dinosaur.

Second, Gond has constructed the ultimate murder machine. Only one move at a time, but it hits like a bus loaded with other busses loaded with lead. It is the Tyrannosaurus rex.
It is also, of course, us.

We're going on a trip.

There is still no way that there needs to be this much granular detail as to the type and location of spikes on an animal.

We're sailing west, across the Panthalassic. To wrap to east.

Only a few more fripparies and vanities to acquire.

We have trained a Velociraptor in Moira. It has nothing to do and nowhere to go. It looks puzzled by this.

The Marish grow restless. They've never been grateful, and soon they'll try to spread unless we do something about them. They'll spread and start all the nonsense all over again and we're damned sick of it.

And why would they want to do that? Can't they see we're happy?

(CLICK HERE to witness the wonders of the Mammal Suppression Plan)

Can't they see we're the best and biggest and brightest and never liked mammals AT ALL?

Can't they...
Oh my.
A new civilization. It doesn't know us. It doesn't know the Marish. It never knew the Devaloke or the Kore or the Thruthvang or anyone. Perfectly alone and innocent. Unambitious.

You know what? It's harmless. It deserves better than a stomping.

You guys, on the other hand...

Civilization 2 - Funeral March

...well. You know why.

You may go in peace, Nephelocs. There's no more need for violence.

There's no more need to make new things.

Just to sit, and to grow fat.

Oh, and happy.

Can't forget the happy.

And if there's a little more sunshine than before with nobody bothering to clean up the trash then well...

...fixing it's just too much to bother with, isn't it?
We've got Gond to spare.

Yes, we are.

Even if people keep complaining over trifles.

Why? There's no reason to move. It's comfy here.

Rattles and rumbles.

I'm sorry?

How can it end? We're perfect.
Look at us.
Look at Gond.
Behold Go-


New Units
New Wonders