Part 12: Episode 12: Underling’s Longest Day

Episode 12: Underling’s Longest Day

What the goodness? Just like the preview said last time! I mean is it alright for so much of an episode to focus on a villain?
I’m sure it’s fine, I mean it’s still mostly about us.
If you say so. We headed to the Basilicom after our, um, meeting with Ram and Rom.

Video- “The Oracle”

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Welcome to Lowee’s Basilicom. Oh my, are you Planeptune’s…?
Oh, yes. I’m Nepgear, Planeptune’s CPU Candidate. I need to speak with you about something.
You’re just a candidate, but not even the other three CPUs travel this far. This must be of dire importance.
I am this nation’s Oracle, Mina Nishizawa. Please let me hear what you’ve come to say.

We explained to the Oracle what we needed. She’s nicer than Miss Kei was, but not really any more helpful.



Then?
I really must apologize, but I cannot grant your request.
W-Why?
Our mascot character has embarked on a mission of national importance that cannot be abandoned.
I don’t exaggerate when I say that if it leaves our land, we will be exposed to great danger.
Is it too much to ask what this mission of national importance is?
I cannot speak of it so casually to visitors. Please try to understand.
Hold! Surely you realize the forces of evil are also after the mascot. If they get there first, it might be destroyed!
If you’re adamant about keeping info from us, we’re going to look into it on our own. Please try to understand that.
I can’t stop you from doing anything. Even if you find out, however, I know it will not be so willing to join you.
Aw, poo…
That said it would be in poor taste if I simply forced you to leave after coming all this way to visit.

I guess she did have some information for us, though.



Folklore about ASIC? Do people still listen to urban legends and stuff like that these days?
It is said Lowee is the nation where Arfoire was born. First of all, do you know who the Deity of Sin, Arfoire, is?
Nothing really comes to mind.
I know the entire syndicate is trying to revive her. She must be a pretty convenient goddess for them.
No, she is not convenient for anyone. She is a goddess, but that is an ill-gained title.
The only reason she exists is to destroy the land and erase all life. She is beyond the control of mankind.
In fact, it is said that at the time she first emerged, Gamindustri was on a path of self-destruction.
Gamindustri’s…destruction?
Then how come that horrible Ass-sick group wants to revive an evil being bent on destroying the entire world?
If that bedtime story is true, she’ll destroy ASIC as well…right?
It is possible their aim is just a pretense. A false slogan, if I may.
If they are the least bit familiar with this legend, not even the most sadistic person would consider reviving her.
Maybe the followers weren’t told, or even lied to about it, so they’d become easy to exploit.
In that case, whoever pulls the strings of the organization must not be human. They will awaken what will kill them.
Ah, all done. How was that story. Did it help you at all?
A goddess bent on complete destruction. That is who ASIC members follow and worship-the goddess, Arfoire.
There sure are a lot of Arfoire-related terms going around. They could taint even the purest hearts of justice.
Just remember we have to beat the snot out of anything with Arfoire in its name.
Ah, a ray of hope pierces the dark clouds of doubt! You are indeed wise!

And that’s when those brats showed up again.



Candy.
Let’s mind our manners, kids. We have guests right now, so hold on a bit longer, okay?
Guests? Ah! It’s the evil goddess failure! She’s breached our home’s defenses!
Scary.
What’s all this about an evil goddess? Don’t be so rude.
Actually, a few minutes ago…
Oh dear, she did such a thing? My sincerest apologies.
No, no, please don’t do that. Don’t bow your head to me, please.
I’m afraid I must. As their source of education and their caretaker… I must apologize to you properly.
You too, kids. Say you’re sorry.
Huh? Why do I gotta do that!? I’ll never bow to the evil goddess.
Never gonna bow.
Listen to me when I speak to you. You will look at them and say you’re sorry for the way you acted.
Hmph. We were the ones attacked.
I fought. I lost. It hurt…

I don’t know, I felt kinda bad for them.



Urp. I’m sorry.
Sorry.
Did anyone else see a really dark aura for a second?
I guess the Oracle of Lowee is more than meets the eye, too.
Really, it’s all right. More importantly, I would really like them to help us, if possible.
I can’t agree to that as their caretaker. They are still too young to be let out on their own.
Although if they volunteer their aid, that is a different matter entirely.
Heck no! I’ll never surrender to my nemesis!
If Ram doesn’t, I don’t wanna, either.
Seems hopeless to argue with babies. We’ve told them what we want, so maybe now’s a good time to take our leave.
I’m sorry we couldn’t be of more help. I will add one more thing. The law and order in this land has deteriorated.
Oops, one more. There is a rumor about impending disaster, though I’m sure it’s just a rumor. Please be careful, okay?
Um, okay. Thank you for…all the stories…and stuff. Goodbye.

You feel bad for everyone, it’s a curse. This next part is great, because of my fantastic plan.



What do you think we should do?
Why are you looking at me? Hmm? Isn’t that…
Great Overlord’s Prinny! We just beat her, and she’s already back to her evil deeds?
Is she acting overtly villainous again?
Maybe, but we have to remember she’s also looking for the mascot, right?
You’re right, but why does that matter?
If we spy on her and keep tabs on where she goes, she might be so kind as to lead us right to it.
She’s always getting in our way. Let’s get in hers for a change.
Wow Iffy, you’re so diabolical. Will it really work out?
If it doesn’t, then we’ll just do what we do. Beauty is as beauty does.

I guess it was okay.



That looks heavy, granny. Can I give you a hand?
Old Woman: No, but thank you. I can’t bother a stranger with this.
No worries. The old and wrinkled ones are our nation’s treasure. Gimme that. Where do you want this?
Old Woman: I apologize for the trouble. Thank you so much.
What’s this? She’s helping out that senior citizen.
This is true. Is she a sheep in wolf’s clothing, perhaps?
It’s a bit early to conclude that. Let’s trail her a bit longer.
Old Woman: That was a great help. My body just isn’t listening to me like it used to, dearie.
That’s a dangerous game, granny. You gotta care for your own body. It’s your greatest asset, y’know.
Old Woman: You’re wise for a young whippersnapper. I haven’t seen those CPUs lately. Maybe that’s why I’m feeling weaker.
Hmm, you seriously believe in those spoiled, flaky CPUs? They’re not good, granny.
Everyone’s starting to worship Arfoire, hoping for change. All the young kids have converted already, y’know.
Old Woman: Oh, is that right? The times already leave me behind. My grandkids say I’m so square.
Trust me, they’ll think you’re the most hip granny around if you convert. You’ll feel energized and young again!

I mean, we stopped her from scamming an old lady.



Keep this awesome 1/8 scale PVC figurine in your room and you’ll have the most incredible luck. Misfortune will flee!
Old Woman: I see. Your pitch is quite good, but it can’t change that thing’s frightening face.
That’s why it works, granny. It has a great impact that most normal statues lack, y’know?
Old Woman: Is that so? I don’t really get it, but it looks like it would be quite expensive.
Yeah, you’ve got good eyes for your crazy old age. It’s pricey but this feels like fate. I’ll cut you a deal.
Okay, enough already!
The hell? I’m kina in the middle of a sales pitch, so kindly piss off y- Ah crap, you idiots again!?
What kind of aggressive selling is that? Don’t manipulate elderly folks.
I’ll kindly invite you to shut it! Fund-raising is a hella important task, y’know!?
Ma’am, please ignore this girl. Also, please try to believe in the CPUs and don’t purchase that scary figure.
Old Woman: Oh, my. Is she a delinquent? I suppose she looks like a peon…
Dammit, I was so close. You’ll rue this day, Nepgear! Rue it!
What? Hey, don’t flee from justice!
It’s fine. Let her go. We’ll keep trailing her.

Indeed, we ruined evil’s day in a variety of bothersome ways!



Child: Ugh, finally.
You’re like so late. We were about to go home.
Okay, okay, I get it. Jeez. Take it easy, okay? Check it out, I brought the goods.
Child: What’s this? It’s just an Arfoire chip.
We already got this one, lady. Lame. You promised us something awesome.
Don’t be a stupid kid, kid. Judge a book by its cover much? Here, you do this and it opens up that.
Child: Huh? What’s this screen? Debug?
Whoa, cool! We can totally break the game. Can we edit our save data?
Not just that, you can trigger flags and finish up an epic RPG in a matter of minutes instead of millions of hours.
Child: Awesome. So, so, awesome. Where do I get this? I need it.
This one’s not for sale, y’see. You gotta take your consoles to ASIC and they’ll fix ‘em up for ya.
Child: I’ll totally go there.
Other Child: Heck yeah. I want my system to do all this stuff, too.
Child: Where can we find ASIC?
Fine, I’ll take you there, but before they do anything, you gotta give ‘em your folks’ names and addresses.

For example, we foiled her diabolical plot to kidnap tiny tots. This time.



Tch, are you serious? Not again!
I am so disappointed, Miss Underling. How could you try to convert such cute little kids into Arfoire’s followers?
My invitation to shut it is still valid! Kids are easier to educate and impress. Forget it, that’s all for now. Later!
Child: Oh. She fled.
Lame. I thought she was going to help us with our games.
Kids, don’t even try to go that route. Arfoire is nothing but bad news.
Don’t you think it’s much more fun and rewarding to work hard, buy a game, and beat it through your own efforts?
Child: Uh, sure.
Lame. Whatever. Let’s go home.
Somehow I don’t think they understand what they were planning is naughty.
It just means the concept of morality in this nation has plunged that low. We’ve got to do something, and quick.

I kind of feel bad for Miss Underling, low-level evil peon jobs seem really difficult.



I can’t just keep doing these little peon chores forever. It’s high time I do something big.
Kitten: Meow.
Huh? A cat? I’m in a pissy mood right now. Get too close and I’ll eat you.
Kitten: Meow. Meeeeow.
I said to keep your distance. You hungry or something?
Kitten: Meow.
ugh, well, I don’t think I ate all the bread I brought for lunch… Here it is.
Kitten: Meow, meowmeow!
Hold your horses, cat. I can’t just give this to you. Whatcha got for me?
I know. If you want this, you gotta promise to worship Arfoire. How’s that?
Kitten: Meowwwwwfoire.

Yeah, it did seem rather… pathetic at times. Still, she’s our enemy so I can’t feel bad for her.



Kitten: Meow…nomnomnom.
Welcome to ASIC, my new recruit. Whatever…it’s pointless to convert a cat.
Kitten: Nomnom, meow! Meeeow!
Fool. Don’t shovel it in so fast. I ain’t gonna steal it back.
Oh dear, what a cute little kitty cat. I hope it’s gotten its shots.
What the goodness should we do? I mean, ASIC just got another follower.
It’s fine, Gear. Sometimes it’s better to just let it go.

So this is about the time you completely vanished for no obvious reason.

Video- “Nepgear and Rom’s Awesome Adventure”

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Does she really know anything? She’s just an underling, after all.
not like I ever expect our plans to go smoothly, but was this a waste of time?
Um, could you excuse me for a moment?
Oh, what’s this? I think I know. Potty break, right? No shame. Even heroines need to relieve themselves!
D-Don’t say it so loud! Goodness.
Jeez, it took loner to find a public restroom than I thought. I should get back.
Hmm? They were around here, right? They’re gone…
C-Compa? IF? Did I take a wrong turn somewhere? What the goodness should I do now?

While I was looking for you guys I ran into that little girl, Rom.



Hmm, isn’t that…? Hellow, you’re Rom, aren’t you?
Uh, uhh… The evil goddess…
No, silly. I’m not evil at all. Please don’t be scared of me.
You won’t…bully me?
What? No, I could never do that. Are you lost? I got lost, too.
Not lost. Looking for my pen.
Your pen?
My pen matches Ram’s. We got them together. It’s important…and I lost it.
I see. Do you remember where you had it last?
When I was taken hostage, probably.
Nepear: All right, it’s a start. If we retrace our steps, maybe we’ll find it. I’ll help you look, so cheer up!
You’ll…help?
Yep, of course. It’ll become more difficult after the sun sets, so let’s get looking. Okay?
‘Kay.

She needed help, so I helped her. That’s kind of what I do.



…
Pen, a pen… I don’t see one. Any luck, Rom?
No…
Hmm. Maybe it’s not here.
M-Miss?
What? Wait, you mean me?
Uh-huh.
G-Goodness. I’m flattered, but I think I’m way too young to be called Miss.
N-No. Actually, definitely no good. Can you just call me by my name? I’m Nepgear.
Miss Nepgear?
Well…okay. What is it, Rom?

Anyway, she had a kind of difficult question.



Who, Blanc? I know her, but I don’t really talk about her to others. She’s smart, wonderful, and a bit mysterious.
She hasn’t come home in a long time. Where is she?
W-Well, Blanc is staying with her CPU friends at the Gamindustri Graveyard. Protecting each other…my sister, too.
* sniffle * I miss my sister…
Goodness, please don’t cry. It’s going to be just fine. I’ll definitely save her.
I couldn’t do anything at the time, but I’ll go back, and… S-So, please stop crying. Okay?
* sniffle * …’Kay.
I’m glad. You’re so strong. Well, we couldn’t find the pen here, so why don’t se look somewhere else.

We headed down to the Expo together.



Hmm.
Miss Nepgear, why did you come to Lowee?
We need to find your mascot character. My power alone isn’t enough, so we want its help.
Lowee is far away from Planeptune.
Yes, that’s right. It wasn’t too bad of a trip, though. It’s for our sisters’ sake. And the world’s.
Oh yeah, we visited Lastation, too. We met a girl named Uni there.
To be perfectly honest, I’d like you, Ram, and Uni to come along with me.
Along…with you?
Yep, that’s what I said. It’s okay, though. I have Compa and IF and Nisa with me.
I’m sure the four of us can save your sister.
…
it’s not here, either. Should we look farther in?

Eventually we got back to the last area we’d been in.



Why are you helping me?
Because you’re in trouble, silly. I can’t just leave you alone.
But…Miss Nepgear… You’re trying to save your sister…
Haha, yeah, I know. I shouldn’t get sidetracked so much.
Still, if my sister knew I focused on saving her and ignored other people, she’d pelt me with her snacks.
…
I know if she were in my shoes she’d help you. So I will, too.
Oh, here it is! Is this your pen?
My…my pen…
Oh, wonderful! We found it. I was worried because it’d been a while since you dropped it. Is it okay?
Oh. Ram might be mad.
That’s true. I bet she’s worried and has gone out looking for you. Come on, I’ll walk you home.
Uh-huh.
U-Um…
Oh? What is it?
Th-Thank you very much, ma’am!
Very much…ma’am? Hehehe. I hope she isn’t so scared of me now. Okay, time to find my friends.
Oh, goodness gracious! I said I was going to the bathroom and then ditched them. I bet they’re mad, especially IF.

I like my explanation better.



The hell do you mean, ‘sorry I’m late’? You took so damn long in the bathroom I assumed you just fell in.
I’m sorry! I apologize! But…I didn’t fall in.
Hey, a heroine doesn’t have to go into details about her private life. Let’s go before we lose our advantage.
Fair enough. I’ll scold you later.
O-Okay. Did you learn anything?
While you were in the potty, Miss Underling got a suspicious call.
She was saying cryptic things like ‘mascot character’ and ‘Block Dungeon.’
We’ve concluded she must be heading to that dungeon. We gotta hurry or she’ll find the mascot before us.
Now you’re caught up. If we screw up because someone fell into the toilet, it won’t be funny anymore. Let’s move!
S-Sure…

Next Time on Hyperdimension Neptunia, Mark Two: The Killachine! Oh my goodness, that sounds frightening!