quote:

You decide to press the button labeled PERFECTION.

The screen on the computer changes to a more beautiful view of the world: it shows a world full of beautiful people and beautiful places. Everything is perfect: people are perfect, everything is perfect, everything is beautiful.

"I understand that you want to have your perfect world, but isn't there a problem with trying to have a perfect world without knowing how to live in a perfect world?" you ask. "What would happen if you became tired of perfection? What if you wanted to test how perfect your perfect world really was? What if you wanted to know how perfect your world would become if the people in your perfect world decided to beat you as a sport?"

You look back at the now-empty screen on the monitor.

"I see," says Dr. Sheppard. "That's exactly the point."

MACHINE 8 is no longer a transparent block of plastic. Now it is a transparent marble and it stands in your living room. You think about how beautiful you would be in that world. Everything in your perfect world is better than anything you have ever seen. You would be so beautiful that you would be an object of desire. You would be a goddess. People would all want you.

"But then what about your childhood?" says Dr. Sheppard. "You might have had a terrible childhood and that would be terrible. You would be haunted by all of those terrible memories."

"You can't have a terrible childhood," you say. "My childhood was wonderful."

"But if you loved your childhood," says Dr. Sheppard, "then there might be something horrible that happened to you during that childhood that made you doubt your memories. And that would be terrible."

"But what was it?" you ask.

"I don't know," says Dr. Sheppard, "But I do know that the adults in your perfect world would care about you."

You will have to ask the adults in the perfect world about your childhood to proceed.

Back in the mysterious computer room, the letters MACHINE G are changing to X and Y.

"We've been thinking about what you asked us," says Dr. Sheppard. "And we've decided that you're a little bit wrong about the point of the mysteries. Instead of protecting you, we're going to use you as a weapon against your perfect world."

And so the final move on the chessboard of the mysteries takes place. You will receive one last push in your back.

"Good luck," says Dr. Sheppard.

"Wait, why do you need to use me?" you ask.

"Because you're such a good student," says Dr. Sheppard. "We're going to test your abilities against some of the most complex programs and machines that ever existed."

You have never been in a program like this before.

The computer tells you that your name is "Haley Lucette Elphid". The computer tells you that you were born in the year 11349. You are 14 years old. The computer tells you that you live in a perfectly beautiful city called Malavarai. The computer tells you that you would be a great scientist and that you would make excellent friends.

The computer tells you that you like to listen to music and go to the movies. You like to drink soda and take walks in the woods. You like to sit in your room and think. You like to draw pictures in your notebooks.

You'll have to face one of these complex programs to discover the mystery of your Missing Childhood.

You decide you'll face:
1."Welcome Home!" you don't know the name of this program, but you don't really care. The logo shows a happy girl running toward you. She has a T-shirt on, and she's wearing a brace on her left leg.

2. "The Curse of the Monkey Button" is a program about a monkey who has the power to control the earth. He is trapped in a cage in the middle of the ocean, and he is being eaten by sharks. His partner, "Indiana Jones", is trying to free him.

3. "The No Child Left Behind of Looney Tunes". You see a blond child at a playground. She is climbing a jungle gym.

4. "Surprise!". The logo shows you in an underground tunnel.

5. "Get Me My Mink"! This program has a crude comic-book style animation, but it looks vaguely similar to "The No Child Left Behind of Looney Tunes".

6. "I've Got an Idea for a New Way to Explain Math". You see a large group of children sitting at tables. They are all wearing lanyards around their necks.

7. "I am Darling". The logo shows a girl who looks like a famous movie star. She has long, dark hair, and is wearing a fancy gown and high heels.

8. "Mr. Bevis Bequest." The logo shows you (who looks remarkably like you) waking up in bed. You see a rocking horse. It's the boy from "The Curse of the Monkey Button"

9. "The Worst American Ever". The logo shows a boy in an old-fashioned, black suit and tie. He is standing in front of a computer screen.

10. "The Unfortunate Effects of Reality - The Musical." The logo is an actor dressed up in a bear costume. He is smoking a cigarette.