Part 27: On the Net in Netopia
Aw yeah! We made it! The Netopian Internet!
...now we just need to get our stolen passport and chips back.
...aaaand I hope my lack of variety in chips doesn't come back to bite me in the arse. Again.
Well, I'm sure it's all just talk and this part of the net isn't that much more dangerous than Electopia or YumLand. at least we know it won't have lurking QuickMans, fuck you YumLand
Anyway! Here in the boombox (it has an awesome scrolling background, trufax) we've got a new enemy! Twisty! They stay still and hit you with lightning from above, iirc.
VacuumFan we've already seen, but-
Oh ho ho... by the end of the update we'll have this chip and another like it in a much more useful code, yessir...
Which would help much more if my chips hadn't been stolen! Blargh!
If only I'd listened to Six Of Spades...
But whatever! We'll make cyber-solutions for all our problems! And here we are, on the Netopian net proper.
...Netopia has a pretty cool background, too. Seems like there's something a little weird about it though, hrm.
Wow! Netopian navis are helpful! This guy is a new friend, for sure.
Wow, and directions too! Yeah, I am down with the Netopian internet.
The viruses are a little tougher than the ones we've seen before, but welp that's game progression for you.
And the direction-panel-puzzles are slightly less involved than YumLand's.
NetSquare's where we're meant to be heading... but hey! I'm low on chips but high on money, let's check out the NetDealer!
THIS GUY. TAKE NOTE OF THIS GUY.
Yeah. You don't wanna miss this dealer. You wanna go right to this dealer, and buy out all his stock of Wind and Fan *'s. Holy moley, I WANT THIS.
You see... Wind and Fan *'s are two-thirds of the most broken program advance in this game. It trivialises any fight. It is a thing of beauty. It is-
missing just one piece, that I stupidly left in my pack.
...
LET'S GO GET THOSE CHIPS
No wait, what's this???
No, not that green navi, I already know what that is. What's THAT? On the left?
Zoom! Enhance! Et cetera!
Aha! I knew there was something weird about the background! That doesn't say "Netopia" at all!
I did mention when we first headed for Netopia that in the original Japanese release it was known as "Amerope". And that the localisation job wasn't perfect. "Ameroppa" is an acceptable Romanisation of Amerope, you see. Netopia has two different scrolling backgrounds, and this one is the only one with text. It's really easy to miss while playing!
Anyway. What else was on this screen?
It's Higsby's navi NumberMan! Not sure why 'a' NumberMan, maybe Higsby has a bunch laying around that he never told anybody about. But Higsby is cool, therefore NumberMan is cool.
uh, sorry, maybe not quite as cool as Higsby
also sorry, I can't promise there won't be more terrible bishifications. actually, I'm not that sorry
Hm, that was kind of underwhelming. The chips aren't too bad, but they're nothing I'd use.
I think I bought them all anyway
To the square!
Holy fuck, I can't deal with how much I love Mr Progs. Best NPCs everrrr.
Oohhh I'll have to remember this for later! For uh, legitimate reasons.
In the NetSquare proper, there are a ton of Mr Progs. Further evidence that Netopia is friggin awesome.
Apparently they're securing the area. Somehow. Possibly with their cuteness.
A navi identical to our newest best friend has helpful information! Also, I have no idea why these navis have football heads.
Aw c'mon. It's the net. They pop up everywhere and for no reason.
The-the defence system... it's flawless
There's more than one navi around giving vague clues about your passport, which just goes to show that whatever navi has your passport isn't exactly subtle. So we should have no trouble finding it!
It also goes to show that Netopians straight up don't give a fuck about cybercrime.
So! Now we've got some amazing hints that the navi we're looking for is... not in the square! Let's go look for him! Outside the square!!
The navi is exactly as obvious as you'd think. But annoyingly, we have to go back and forth on one-directional paths to get over there. Of course.
It's not hard though.
Nah man, we're cool with you buying random Electopian passports. Just not ours.
Apparently bad navis are geniouses everywhere, no matter the country.
Whee! Virus fight! Who could've seen this coming?
Aw man, cheap move. I hate HardHeads.
...THIS IS EXACTLY WHY I HATE HARDHEADS.
But even that's no match for Mega, so yaaay.
Haha DAYUM, Mega's got smack!
It would be hilarious if after all that, we ended up retrieving somebody else's passport.
But you know, RPG. It's inevitable it's ours.
Sure, man. What, you wanna be like our arch-nemesis now? Sorry, but that's reserved for navis with unique sprites. And names. And navis that are actually threatening.
Yay!
YAY!
I forgive this guy. He just wanted to illegally buy a stolen passport, he didn't know it belonged to some cool 11-year old like Lan. It's an honest mistake.
....hello, hello, hello! What's this?
Bummer.