Part 26: DA NAAAAAH!

Greetings, I'm Ephraim225, and I like money!

Seeing as Epee Em won't be playing Red Sun, I've taken it upon myself to do the RS-exclusive scenarios.

...

OH MY GOD WHY DID I SIGN UP FOR THIS! LET ME GO LET ME GO PLEASE GOD ALM-

*static*



The opening of Red Sun isn't any different from Blue Moon, so I'll start with the beginning of the tournament prelims. And yes, they re-named the tournaments to create the illusion of two separate tournaments with different contestants all so that the winner of the other set can do absolutely nothing to help you. I don't get it either.

But first...I have to pick a name. 3 letters, hmm...



>



>

I tried "ASS", "FAG" and "666". Capcom doesn't like letting people have fun, do they.



This will have to do for now. Not like it matters.



Also, the game is being suspiciously generous with money. I had enough for two HP Memories here and a Cannon C, the latter of which lets me perform the Giga Cannon PA. Yeah, they got rid of Z-Cannon and put boring-as-hell Giga Cannon in its place.



My first opponent turned out to be Tetsu. You've already seen that, so no sense in putting up more images.



Anyways, the next opponent is exclusive to Red Sun, so here we are. IT'S GUTSMAN!



DA-NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!!! Who the hell invited this useless ass?! Something awf---- something BAD is going to happen, I just know it.



Chisao's kind of a dick in this game, just like everything else.



Dex tells him to shut up, which sets off the kid's water works. No, really.



This sentence would be true if my sanity weren't capable of holding it together through this game...twice. Three times, on the other hand...



Of course, there's some stupid scenario before every match. Seems like the version-exclusives are the worst scenarios of them all. Well, except for maybe...well, you'll see.



Of course, Chisao just HAS to get himself into trouble.



You've got mail!



Kidnapped Babies count: 1

Okay. I just want to ask you all. Who would EVER kidnap CHISAO? I'd probably snap after holding the kid for about 6 seconds.



YES, GENIUS.



The kidnapper even gave us a clue to Chisao's apparent location. It's clear to me that this is only happening to annoy the player. In other words, FILLEEEEEEEEER FILLER NIGHT



Why always me?!



*gasp* They said "die"!



Enough bullshit. Here's the first clue. It should be pathetically easy.



Lan, haven't you EVER read a Japanese graphic novel in your entire life? You read the letters vertically! Considering Electopia is supposed to be the future Japan, this clue shouldn't be hard for anyone in the game to figure out.

But this is a game...so I don't know if I should count it as a fuckup. Or should I even be counting fuckups at all? At any rate, my counter is separate from Epee Em's.



"OLD MAN IN SQUARE" in case you couldn't figure that out. This guy gives you a memo.



This clue is even EASIER than the last one. I'm not even going to explain this one.



I only see one navi here.



Nope, still not a hard puzzle.



Nope, but you do get a shiny e-mail from...



...really? This kid knows how to send e-mail? Why did it trail off like that? Real e-mails don't trail off in elipses! EVER!



Okay, now the puzzle might be a bit tricky. Actually no it isn't. It's a message that's been erased slightly.



Third program from the right in the Elec Tower gives us...



...A three-round virus battle. It's not that interesting.



Really, given the number of times this has occured in the series, it can't be that hard.




Mega Man points out for no real reason that "his" voice is being disguised.



Next we have to collect 5 pieces of data and take them back to Elec Town. Why? More filler. Duh.




He's kidding. He actually gives it to you for free despite our mysterious child molester informing us that getting the data won't be so easy. Also, you can only carry 999,999 zenny at a time anyhow, so I kind of saw this coming.



Here's something neat that happened on the way to the next navi: I killed 3 Mettaurs with one Guard1 chip, but the game only counts it as a DOUBLE delete, not a Triple.



This guy will sell you his data for 1,000 zenny. Honestly. I was short on cash at the time, so I had to grind it back. What the hell.



The third guy asks you to take a fucking QUIZ for his data. The questions are all easy, except for...



It is highly unlikely that you will know the answer to this question. Spoiler alert: It's Nanako. Yeah. You can't even actually TALK to her and ask her name.

Oh, and talking in ye olde butcherede Englishe? Not cool anymore unless Dragon Quest does it.



Somehow I found Data 5 before Data 4. This guy has it, but he wants a fight in exchange for it.



THIS GUY.



FUCK YOU. FUCK. YOU. Why should I need a specific Battlechip to progress?! What's so great about Bubbler R?! There aren't even any Shrimpy viruses in any area of the game so far, so the odds of me having even one Bubbler R are slim to none. I had to backtrack to fucking ACDC Area 2 and buy one off a Net Dealer. Fuck this.



Anyways, the guy set viruses inside the tower, so after busting those...





So the whole thing seems to be a ruse to make me late to my match? Who could come up with such a plot?



Dex threatens to withdraw if Lan gets thrown out of the tournament. Why? I don't know, he'd probably lose to Top Man anyways.



Just in time, of course.



AHAHAHA THAT'S A GOOD ONE

Guts Man is now WORSE than he was in Battle Network 3. Sure, he has a buster gun (which doesn't hurt), but his "new" move drops easily avoidable rocks onto your field (Not shown in the video, sadly). And he has his useless punch which can't hit you. What happened to his shockwaves and flying fist attacks?!



You did. You've shown us all how useless you really are.



Huh



What. WHAT. I did all that for NOTHING?!



My thoughts exactly. This scenario may not have been as pointless as the cooking scenario, or the ProtoMan BS, but think about it! How did that stupid kid come up with a plan like THAT?! Why even bother?! I STILL beat Dex!

This game is making my head hurt.



DON'T DEFEND HIM!



So anyways you get Guts Soul out of this somehow.

Guts Soul is actually pretty useful. Null-element chips get powered up by 30 (That includes SUPER VULCAN), and if you mash B fast enough you become invincible while firing a machine gun. The only problem is your charge shot becomes the useless Guts Punch. I guess you can punch obstacles with it. Aqua Soul is probably better than this.