Part 24: Captain Loogie

Now if I remember correctly, you need to uncover the sunken 'Mad Monkey' to trade for the map piece in the boutique. You better get sailing there buddy.




Oh... Right.




Guess you'll need to find another means of transportation.



I'm searching for the treasure of Big Whoop.


Yeah? When I was first mate on the Limping Limpet we went in search of Big Whoop. We heard it was buried under a place called Blinky Island. Never found the island or the treasure.




Hope your luck is better.


I'm interested in chartering a ship.


Great! My fee is 6000 pieces of eight.



Six who that lifted what?!



Do you give credit?


Ha ha ha ha ha!


I'll come back later.



Somehow I get the feeling there's going to be a conveniently placed method of earning exactly 6000 pieces of eight around here...




Oh hello, spitting competition.





A volunteer! Alright, settle down folks. This kid looks like a serious contender. What's your name, boy?




I am, of course, Captain Loogie.


Loog-o-rama! Hockin' the big ones for fame and fortune! Spit away!




[Impressively unpleasant noise]



You can do it! I believe in you!







Everybody run! Gee, that's too bad, Captain. Let's give him a big hand anyway folks.



Well, you're a shameful embarassment and a failure! What are you gonna do now?!




He's going to the bar ladies and gentlemen!









Oh crap, you were supposed to be working!




Act natural!




Shit we've been rumbled. Run!




Oooh, you're good at this!



Don't worry, I washed my hands.


Nice try. But not good enough. You're fired.



Uh, how... terrible?


Excuse me...


Yeah, boy?


Grog, please.


Sorry, you'll need some ID for that.


Will you accept a temporary library card.


Let me see it.


Okay, here.


Consultant? You look more like a flooring inspector to me. Alright... name yer poison.


Whaddya got?


We have some speciality drinks here at the bloody lip. Like: Yellowbeards Baby, Bloody Stump and Blue Whale.



A whole menagerie of beautiful beautiful booze, get one of each.




And a FREE crazy straw. Tonight will be a good night.



Yuck.


It's an acquired taste.



Good music, good booze.




Almost makes you want to...




Get the fuck on down!




Oh my god!




He's the smoothest dancinest coolest motherfucker this side of the island!




Who knew?




Beautiful.




Let's take this party up a notch and mix these baby's together.




Down the hatch.



Boy, this stuff makes my spit thick.



Dense spit, eh? You know what that means.




It's time to raise some... Wait... Why is it still like, noon on this island... ?




Never mind that, let's get down to some serious world class cheating.




Oh what kind of booze-swilling pirate are you anyway?




Oh fine, just distract everyone then.



Sounds like old augustus spotted the mail-boat.



Wuss.




That crusty old coat is the only thing keeping you upright isn't it.




Okay, first place is now closer, get to it.



False alarm.



Give 'em hell, you beautiful spineless bastard.



Captain Loogie is in the house! Spit away!



Always remember, never throw your bodily fluids against the wind.




NOW!




Captain Loogie strikes again!





That was truly awe-inspiring! Sports fans, we've seen something incredible here today! Let me congratulate you and give you this fine commemorative plaque. I salute you Captain Loogie.



Wow, so mixing those drinks seems to give you special powers depending on their colour...




Let's try it again.




For science!




Also good times and debauchery... But mostly science!




Oh Jesus what's happening!?




Oh fuck. This is bad. This is very bad.




...Oh




*snicker*