Part 4: Vercingetorix42's Journal

Vercingetorix42's Journal: Or how I learned to stop worrying about Soulblighter and love the purple arrow.| YouTube |


6:25---It's been ten years, and the Commander is just as close to pronouncing my name as I am to shooting this bow straight. I blame that book on phonetics by Stewarth Griffinh.

6:40---The Commander asked me to regale him with the finale of the play where I shoot the purple flaming arrow. My humiliation is complete.

7:05---Overheard the Commander talking of Fenris' power of “Sword Blast”. I was a bit uncomfortable learning that this power will “unload on anybody he hits”, but has low reliability and sometimes “gets stuck”.

8:15---Being chased down by a 3 foot long wasp doesn't lend itself to stoic composure.

“Nice bee! Nice bee! I think heyzeus has honey! FRELL! Watch the arrows, friends!”

It didn't help matters that AriadneThread nearly shot me in the ass after the wasp was dead.

12:00---The Commander is again criticizing our ability to hit. I acknowledge it was a poor decision to trade my Heron Guard equipment for a printing press, however we were never tasked with hitting flying objects during the correspondence course in archery. For years all I've had to do is ensure I don't set the audience on fire.

14:22---Picked up part of a tablet in the water where the Wight was...

...and I told Soulblighter that if they move my underwater spot one more time, then I'm quitting, I'm going to quit. And I told Shiver too, because they've moved my underwater spot four times already, and I used to be over by the bank, and I could see the squirrels, and they were merry...

Soulblighter was indeed evil.

16:48---The Commander spoke to us about frolicking in the forest. This adventure could give me ideas for a new addition to the play... YouTube

24:06---Gor'Don's alive! We discovered Gor'Don had rendezvoused with the fir'Bog first. Ratatozsk , heyzus and I exchanged looks and then simultaneously hit him dead center. I made penance as best I could by shouting “Mai'Bahd”, an ancient word of disdainful apology. I was worried for a moment the other fir'Bog would react negatively to this, until a half a dozen arrows hit near his corpse.

Gor'Don had a way with people.

27:18---Not the bees! Not the bees! They're in my eyes!

27:35---We live.

After action report---Fortunately for us actors, we fit in well with the fir'Bog, as they can't hit anything either. We're now members of the tribe, and have access to the vast hidden support staff who follow the fir'Bog around keeping their tights clean and colorful after forest combat. It seems the fir'Bog culture believes that image is more important than combat efficiency. I hope to amend that attitude with a little Heron Guard pragmatism. Still, I have to admit the laundry service beats the hell out of the Heron Guard policy of `just air it out'.