The Let's Play Archive


by really queer Christmas

Part 32: Endless Squizzards

Update 32: Endless Squizzards

Underwater Highway

After a little bit of faffing about, we are good to finally continue heading down this highway. The highway starts off right next to a Pluto fast travel spot, which you can use to go run around the entirety of Headspace and finish up a bunch of sidequests that are mostly useless... but who would do something like that??

A Rose By Any Other Name

So... how's married life treating ya?

Ha! Married life is a joke! I ended relations with that pitiful excuse of a captain a long time ago!

But... your wedding was literally yesterday.

Oh, no... Does that mean that you and Space Husband are...

Ouch... That poor guy...

Guess we'll need to prepare for the Space Ex-Husband boss fight.

Alas! My journey has gone full circle. It is more obvious to me now more than ever that my perfect suitor does not exist!

Don't say that, Sweetheart! I'm sure your soulmate is out there somewhere!

Oh, my sweet Hero! How I've longed for your voice! But no... I must refrain. I've already decided my path. Searching for a suitor is much too old-fashioned for me...

W-What? M-Make a suitor? Is that even possible!?

By regular-people means no! But a wealthy person, such as myself, does not abide by such rules! I'm going some place only filthy rich people, like myself, can afford... To a family of sea witches that specialize in clients with... special demands. Toodle-loo, peasants! I'm late for my appointment!

So... should we follow her... or what?

I feel like every time Sweetheart shows up, something bad happens.

Yeah... When it comes to disaster... she's in a league of her own.

So Sweetheart is back... like one story beat after we defeated her forever. I think she works a lot better in this section, and you'll see why.

TOLL GATOR: So you kids want access to the toll road? Well... sure! But while we're at it, let's make this a little fun. Why don't you go ahead and spin this wheel.

Oh uh, sure I guess.

I guess that could help us lower the cost a bit...

... I'm starting to see where this is going...

Welcome to this area's gimmick. There's several more tolls on this road that will threaten to eat up all the clams we earned from beating up Mr. Jawsum and Pluto. While clams will, eventually, be a non-issue... as you can see that day is not today. So we'll pass.

Instead, we're gonna head over here and avoid paying any kind of toll. Though the issue is we're going to have to fight things. Now... there's a quick and easy way to make clams on this highway, but I need to show off the enemies anyway so we're gonna be cheap right now.


Here's 2 of the new monsters in this area. Meet the mussel and the shark fin. The mussel has a crapton of defense, while the fin has a lot of attack. Seriously, that fin can put a hurt on you if you aren't careful. The mussel can too, but it likes being tanky so I usually target it last.

Getting this early is really good though. It's the only weapon of Hero's that doesn't benefit his health or juice, but his attack instead. Specifically, it ignores the defense of all mussels so one hit kills them. Putting it on Hero for this area is incredibly good to make Hero useful. Everyone else can go after the non-mussel enemy while Hero knocks them out at the end of the round. I only wish there were more weapons that functioned like this.

Here's the bunny enemy for this area. Still quite cute, and does minimal damage per usual.

Hmm... this place seems... shady.

Ah, we must be at Shady Mole's home. The watermelon holds an inner tube, it's the red ribbon but for defense instead of offense. It's... not good.

Just in case you thought I was exaggerating about the Mussel's defense or the usefulness of the Shucker.

And that's the last joke in the game! We'll be sure to stop by the Weeping Willow and try and get her to weep from laughter.

Making it through the worksite, there's a little cavern here that we can use to continue through the back way without having to use the toll spots on the highway.

Eh, so this thing says. But if you're cheap, like me, then hold off until later.

So uh, say hello to the...

Yeah, that. These guys are somewhat tough. They actually end up both targeting Kel and TOAST him. Forcing me to use one of my many many Jams.

They also seem to speak backwards, and are one of the few (if only) random encounters to talk during the battle. Kinda weird!

So this is a strange room... there's some musical clams in here that can each play a little tune that sounds like a music box. It's quite nice... but as far as I know, there's nothing to do in here. I've googled to see if there's a puzzle and I don't even get some 0 reply reddit thread.

Anyway, down south of the entrance to the cavern is the way past the first toll, but before the second. So we'll leave to check this place out before continuing on.

Like the other telescopes, it's quite a pretty view! I wonder if we'll get to go visit that city.

We've seen almost every single one of these now... they still bring a sly smile to my face.

...So are you a boy that is a fish, or a boy obsessed with fish... just... curious...


At least this electric fish works, unlike the one in the ghost hut... we still need to find batteries for that thing, huh?

I haven't really been grinding, just fighting whatever enemies I see and I've already doubled the amount of clams we had at the start. Still... I'm not gonna pay just yet.

TOLL GATOR: You mean to say you kids don't got 2000 clams on ya? That's real sad... Real tough luck, I tell ya... But, hey! No need to get down! I got a surefire way to help you out of this ordeal, see? Ahem... You just need to sign these papers, these papers, these papers, and these papers... And lo and behold! You'll have 2000 clams just like that!

Yeah uh... we're not gonna sign any contracts that Mr. Jawsum has created... If you do sign, the Gator gives you 2K clams... then raises the price to get past to 5K... who will lend you 3K more clams only to raise the price to 10K clams... It's technically a way to make 5K clams for free, but eh effort.

TOLL GATOR: Sorry, sir. I almost didn't recognize you there. These sunglasses are a shade too dark, you know what I mean? Even if you're the boss's favorite, rules are rules. But maybe I can offer you a fairer rate... How's 1000 clams sound?

That's a much better deal! I'm still going to continue through the cavern but at least this way we can finish exploring the highway a bit.

Huh... the Gator guys seem to be the ones doing the road work here. Well, at least the toll money isn't going solely into Mr. Jawsum's pockets.

I Just Love the 50s!!!

This is a cute little diner.

Aw... well now it's a little sad.

Oh... it's...

Special Mixtape| I Want Nothing More

He's uh... not taking it well, I see.

Ah, now this place...!!!


Welcome to the Seacow Farms! Currently hosting more squizzards than seacows. What's a squizzard?

Why this is! Squizzard is the last enemy of the endless highway. They can give everyone a random emotion, and have some decent attacks but aren't too much of an issue. However, they appear here about 10 times and can be wiped out... if you do so...

This guy in the barn will thank us and pay us for killing them all. How much will he give?

That's quite a bit, especially considering the Squizzards also drop clams upon death. The best part, though?

They respawn, and the quest can be repeated as many times as you want! Say hello to the game's designated grinding spot! I'll be back here later, but yeah this area's quite great!

Something else worth noting, do you see that squizzard in the bottom right corner? It just spins forever and ever... it cannot be interacted with and just spins... It only appears here if your WTF value is over 8. It's uh, a thing I guess.

Heading back into the cavern and to the far left of the area, there's another path through to the next place to continue being cheap.

Sweetheart Laugh

...Well that was a thing that happened.

The reason that creature will tell you to skip this area is because this place is CRAWLING with enemies, even if you run, you'll likely have to fight at least a couple of enemies just to be able to move them out of the way. I've gained 8 or so levels just from fighting on this highway, it's quite recommended to do so as well!

Wait, really? There's gotta be more.

Uh... nope! This really is the end. That was quick! Only took me about 45 minutes in total too! Let's head back and open that toll gate.

TOLL GATOR: Huh? Where am I? Oh crap! Boss, look! I wasn't sleepin'... I was just- Oh... You're a bunch of kids... Bet you just want me to open the gate. Well, I'm gonna be real with you... These toll prices are jacked. It's gonna cost you 3000 clams but I'd find another way around if I were you.

Hmm... I have an easier way to get through...

TOLL GATOR: Sorry, sir. I almost didn't recognize you there. These sunglasses are a shade too dark, you know what I mean? Even if you're the boss's favorite, rules are rules. But maybe I can offer you a fairer rate... How's 1000 clams sound?

Thanks, Hero! We're sitting on a nest egg of nearly 30K clams too. Clams are officially no longer an issue for the rest of the game.


That's uh... really creepy writing, game!! Let's also take another peek inside the hole left behind...

As soon as you hit the "Yes" on the prompt you IMMEDIATELY get that screen and it makes me jump every time. I think it's because I'm expecting a transition first, which doesn't happen here. This game is really good at being a horror game when it wants to be... and as someone who hates horror games, I'd rather it not be!!!

Since we've hit the end of the highway, the only place left to go is up! And we find Mari here waiting for us with a picnic. We should oblige her, right?

It looks like there's a long bridge up ahead.

Whatever you do, don't look down!

I can't believe we really made it all the way to the end of the highway.

But you did... and you should all be proud!

The bridge at the top of the cliff leads to a place called Deeper Well...

Word is that Deeper Well has been around for a long time, but the bridge wasn't there until recently.

Who knows what's on the other side?

Do you think that's where Basil is?

We don't know for sure... but there's only one way to find out!

That... looks nice and properly endgame area to me. It's very mysterious and ominous looking... so... time to go there!


Wow, just look at this place!

There's so many cool plants around. I bet Basil would have really liked it here.

Basil... He would have really liked it... right, guys?

Yeah... I'm sure he would have.


Huh? What is it?

Why do you ask that, Hero?

Let's see here... Basil... Basil loves taking care of flowers... and taking photos of his friends. He's warm, calm, and gentle... and even when he's upset... he'll always manage a smile. The rest... is starting to get a little fuzzy.

It's okay... Me too, Hero. It's like I still miss him, but... it's kind of hard to remember why.

But that doesn't change anything, right? Even if our memories aren't as strong as they used to be... we still have to save him.

Basil is our friend... and more importantly, he needs our help!

You're right, Aubrey. I think we've all been apart from Basil for way too long.

But I'm sure we'll find him... as long as we have Omori to keep us on track.

I bet he could use a big hug right now!

Then when we're all together again... we should all give him a big ol' hug! Heh, heh...

Aww... It's nice to see you two getting along so well for a change. I could hug the both of you right now!

H-Huh!? Me and Kel... G-Get along?

W-What are you talking about, Hero? Stop being weird!

Haha... Relax you two. I'm just playing around.