Part 181: 12/3/09

12/3/09

I don’t think any of us have really processed what’s going on.

Video- “Nyx”

Learn

> Mitsuru walked in.
…He’s awake now.
Let’s meet tonight on the 4th floor.
…Okay.
Alright, then, I’ll see you later.
Damn that Ryoji…
……

We all got together so Ryoji could explain what the hell he’d been talking about last night. Well, not all, Aigis is still… anyway we got together.



> Everyone has gathered…
> Ryoji is sitting on the far sofa, hanging his head…
Is everyone present?
Are you okay, Ryoji-kun?
Yeah, I’m okay. Thanks.
Besides, there’s more I have to tell you guys.
Ryoji-kun…
There are many questions we need answered.
To begin with, you said Shadows were here to facilitate the rebirth of the maternal being…
Please elaborate on this.

It seemed the Shadows were here to bring death to the world, which is a major drag. It’s funny, though, because that doesn’t really explain where Shadows come from, just what their purpose is.



Who the hell’s Nyx…?
Nyx is the mother of Shadows. In ancient times, she bestowed “Death” to this world.
If she is awakened, darkness will once again cover the land, and all life will vanish.
All life will vanish!?
Are you saying… everyone will die!?
It would be more accurate to say that… Everyone will forfeit the will to live.
……! Are you talking about the Lost!?
> …Everyone seems to be coming to the same conclusion.
> Every human being will become like The Lost…
> …Leading to the extinction of mankind…
> And the end of the world.

I mean he said Nyx is the ‘mother of Shadows’, but plenty of Shadows seem to pop up without her having to be around so clearly someone else is responsible for them now. And whoever, whatever it is probably also was the one who convinced Mitsuru’s grandfather to start all this shit, because how else would he even know it was possible?



But, it’s still possible to keep it from happening, right?
……
Wh-What…?
There’s no way to prevent it…?
…I’m sorry…
Wait, what’re you apologizing for!?
Are you saying it’s for certain!?
Yes…
You heard the bell…
I’m The Appriser… The Appriser of Death…
My existence is the affirmation of the Fall.
The affirmation… of the Fall…
> Everyone is at a loss for words…
> It is inevitable… The entire human race will become members of The Lost…
> Ryoji’s existence confirms the impending extinction of mankind.
> That can’t be…

You’re probably thinking it’s weird I’m fixating on something so trivial when Ryoji’s slinging a bunch of bullshit about inevitable ends and such but I think it’s pretty important, because whoever’s behind it will just try again even after I beat this Nyx down.



I’m afraid you will not live to see spring…
But, that’s not too far away!
……
……
……
* laugh * Wh-What’re you guys freaking out about?
All we have to do is defeat this Nyx!
And that won’t be a problem cuz we’ve never lost!
Yeah! We’ll beat it!
Defeating Nyx is… impossible.
It has nothing to do with strength, ability, or power.
Just as all living things die… and the flow of time is continuous…
Nyx cannot be defeated.
What…?
That’s bullshit!
This is all so sudden…
> The others are startled…

And beat her down I will, or die trying, because the only other option would be to run away.



But now, I have a human form… So I can talk with you, laugh with you, cry with you…
All gifts I received because I was inside her.
Of all the people on Earth, it was she who carried me…
……
Thanks to that… I am able to give you a choice.
A choice…?
Nyx’s coming cannot be avoided.
But, it is possible to live in peace until she arrives.
You’ll have to… kill me.
If I were to disappear, all memories of the Dark Hour would disappear with me, as would any recollection of the fate that awaits you.
You won’t remember anything.
The coming of the Fall will be instantaneous… and you will not suffer.
We’ll forget everything?
You’ll be able to return to your normal lives.
And in doing so, the time until the Fall will be slightly delayed.

Ryoji may have lived inside me, which I have by the way taken quite a number of showers over since yesterday, but clearly he doesn’t really understand humanity much.



But thanks to her, there’s a part of me that’s “human”.
So, if death comes from her hands, I think it may be possible.
> Ryoji is looking at you…
Ryoji-kun…
If you don’t kill me, you will suffer more than you could ever imagine.
With no hope for salvation, you will live every day paralyzed by the fear of your impending death.
And I… I don’t want you to have to endure such pain.
I can’t let my memories go.
She’s right…
…To forget everything would be like hiding from the truth!
Would that really be such a bad thing?
All that awaits you now is despair.

I mean like he said, he’s Death itself and can’t really die even if it is me that kills him. So what the hell does HE know about being afraid?



Please, don’t make your decision without at least thinking about what I’ve said.
……
Why is this happening!?
……
> Ryoji silently stood up…
You don’t have to decide right now.
You have until December 31st, New Year’s Eve, to think about it.
After that, I’ll dissolve into the blackness of the Dark Hour and become intangible.
Ryoji…?
I will disappear with the coming of Nyx anyways…
So, don’t worry about me.
I’ll be back on New Year’s Eve…
H-Hey, Ryoji, wait!
> Ryoji is gone…
> He disappeared… Just like Pharos…

I’ve heard that anger is just fear that feels better.



……
We will see him again, on New Year’s Eve…
> ……
> …Ryoji’s revelation was all too devastating…
> The world will soon perish…
> That mankind will perish…
> And that the only option you are given is the right to choose how to die…
> Death is inevitable…
> The Appriser truly brought about a death sentence…
> ……
> You cannot think clearly right now…
> How does a person choose the way she will die?

Which I guess means I’m terrified out of my mind right now.



This is such bullshit, man…

Everyone’s in such shock.



It feels like my insides are being torn apart…

And frankly I couldn’t blame them if they held me responsible for all this.



I’m trying my best to live up to the promise I made myself yesterday to be a whole new person starting today.



We’re trying to live our lives the best we can, and…
…it’s all going to end now? Come on! Get real…!

It’s just so hard to live up to that in the face of someone telling you that you’re certain to die before the spring.



We’re all going to die…?
Regardless of how much we want to live?

And it seems like we’re in danger of cracking and breaking apart when we should be coming together.



This can’t be happening…!

It’s all just so murky right now, and without some kind of clarity I risk losing this fragile new self I’m trying to build. My friends need me to be strong even if they don’t like me anymore. So, I’m going to do something fear’s been holding me back from. At the very least, it’ll be one less thing I regret not doing when Nyx kills us all.