Part 55: BRAINS.
--Today's Swarm!--
Dunsparce
Dunsparce has a drill for its tail. It uses this tail to burrow into the ground backwards. This Pokémon is known to make its nest in complex shapes deep under the ground. It hides deep inside caves where no light ever reaches it and remains virtually motionless there. When spotted, this Pokémon escapes backward by furiously boring into the ground with its tail. It can float just slightly using its wings.
Choro Notes: The secret to why Dunsparce is so neat is its ability. Serene Grace doubles the chance of moves' additional effects triggering. Dunsparce makes great use with Body Slam and Headbutt in this way!
Zorak Notes: I bloody love this tsuchinoko. He's a very good normal type 'mon, has a really unique moveset, and is fun. Used one in SoulSilver and haven't regretted it!
HulkaMatt Notes: Saaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaandfiiiiiiiiiiish. SAAAAAAAAANDFIIIIIIISH. The coolest snake I ever did see.
Don't sit on my sofa, Lucas.
Get out of my villa, Lucas.
God DAMN you are so lame.
Stupid Lucas. Just wanted to relax today.
AAH!
Please stop talking in unison, it's really creepy. It's like a bunch of exeggcute mastered human speak.
I legit don't even remember who gave this to me.
Technology: Open it up and touch things. UPGRADE!
Oh whoa. It's like a park full of stuff
Choro Notes: Don't listen to a goddamned word she says. Nine times out of ten the computer is cheating. Here are some things you should know about the Battle Frontier and my time with it today:
-An opponent with Confuse Ray is a game-ender. God help you if you're confused AND paralyzed because that's as good as being out.
-I missed a Magcargo with Surf four times in a row. The ONLY way this works is if the Magcargo had a BrightPowder which only gives a 10% boost to evasion.
-I was crit'd to death three times in a row by a Magneton.
-AncientPower's 10% chance of increasing all the user's stats? three times in a row. Add on my attacks missing and I was stuck fighting a Lunatone I couldn't possibly beat.
-Fissure, Sheer Cold, Horn Drill and Guillotine will hit roughly 60% of the time for an instant KO.
-Had a Bayleef dodge every attack I threw at it only to be slowly whittled down with ineffective mega drains.
-Focus Bands make your opponent's pokémon IMMORTAL.
-You are going to flinch and not get the opportunity to make moves.
-You are going to be burnt, paralyzed, frozen or confused by almost every attack that doesn't flat out kill you.
-I lost to a fucking Igglybuff
-Quick Claw will trigger 90% of the time—usually leading to a Guillotine which also connects!
-Don't do the battle tower. Just don't. It's bullshit and is the biggest example of this shit happening. Go in there if you really don't believe this shit, you'll see it around battle 15 on. Once you get to roughly battle 30 they start throwing Zapdos and Latias into the mix.
-I fully condone cheating to beat the battle tower. I've STILL lost with a hacked team of monsters. Sheer Cold-No Guard Ninjask and Wonder Guard Spiritomb, both defeated effortlessly around battle 40.
The main draw of the Battle Frontier are the fabulous prizes. A lot of items can't be gotten anywhere else.
Check out some of the wonderful TMs that can be bought with points won in the attractions~
The Battle Frontier has five attractions, the only rule shared between all five are that the following monsters are banned:
The plus side of this being that you won't end up facing against them yourself, either.
Wisdom.
Uhhhhh
Music: Platinum - Battle Factory
Huh.
Choro Notes: All attractions will lower your monsters to L.50. That is, they have to be at LEAST L.50 as they're stats aren't raised. You're gimping yourself if you enter with a L.30 monster. The Battle Factory's two options are basically "L.50 guys or L.100 guys." The selection of monsters changes for both, L.50 monsters tend to be like Misdreavus and Stunky while L.100 lets you play with Blastoise and Sceptile.
At the start of your first round, the attendants flat out tell you what your opponent(s) is/are using.
After that you get to rent 3 monsters! Check out the items and moves of each monster is really the key.
Based on the monsters I was told about and the choices here. . .
Sure why not.
W-who are you?
Choro Notes: All battles in the factory are 3 vs 3 and are in the set style. What that means is it treats it like double battles and wifi battles. If an opponent's monster is KO'd you don't get the "Ace Trainer Roxy is about to use WOOPER" message and you keep fighting with what is out. This is true for ALL Frontier attractions.
Generally you pray for a sweeper because the best strategy is really to just KO it before it can get you.
Post battle your team is healed and you're told about the next trainer just like last time. . .
But now you have the option to trade one of your monsters for a monster your opponent had. HOWEVER. You aren't told what moves, etc. the monster has, you have to either guess or go off of what you saw in battle.
God I saw Xenon here at least 30 times while playing this. I'm really not gonna sit here and show you every fight in the place but if you manage to get through 20 matches consecutively in either L.50 or open. . .
demanding a match with you.With ME~~~~?
Yes. Yes I am.
Oh well that's fine. I have a tough, Zen Headbutt using Clefable.
Whoa, jeez. I'm so glad Jorge isn't that kind of spaz.
. . . . you made a scouter.
Oh you fucking cheater!
Well yes if you're gonna just announce it to everyone who totally was watching my amazing battle streak! It's not like ANYONE is only just now starting to watch!
Oh, don't let that number concern you!I have no idea what the heck you're talking about but I feel condescended towards.
Music: Platinum - Battle! Frontier Brain
Choro Notes: Thorton
I would love to tell you Thorton's backstory, etc but. He doesn't really have one! All of the Frontier Brains except for Palmer were created for Platinum (and appear in HeartGold/Soul Silver). Thorton's monsters are always random as he's bound by the same rental rules as you are. It IS, however, heavily implied that he raised all of the rented Pokémon.
Oh. OH.
ok only 90% accuracy, it's cool.
Haha!
YEAH. ROCK ON CLEFABLE DUDE.
. . . wish I had a rock to throw at this one.
Choro Notes: Detect is basically just Protect. It's the game equivalent to the anime's "PIKACHU, DODGE IT."
Oh speed boost, you're pretty obnoxious~
OK seriously.
CRAP.
Aghghaghaghgahghghh
STOP THAT.
STOP THAT
Choro Notes: This is the most infuriating goddamned thing.
THANK YOU.
:I
:IIIII
So much contempt.
Choro Notes: Accupressure has a unique effect: It randomly raises one of its stats sharply.
Hey that's great while you were all holistic about your shit guess what
Ahem. Eat it nerd.
some useful data, I suppose.
Eh, learn from the mistakes.
Well yes, the odds are very unlikely I'd have these same three.
Points!
Great. So it's like a badge that doesn't do anything. Wonderful.
Choro Notes:
The Battle Factory's a fun timewaster and a good way to try monsters you've never used. Really fun to do co-op over wifi!
Music: Platinum - Battle Hall
Choro Notes: Battle Hall
Does anyone happen to remember a few years ago when I'd run tournaments? There was one that always got a high entry rate: the 1 on 1 Grand Prix. This is sort of that! You enter one monster into the event. Let's enter our resident helltank.
Once you enter the hall you're asked to pick a type! You'll fight a random monster of that type. Dom's immune to and can wreck Electric-types so let's pick that.
OH WELL GEE I WONDER.
Choro Notes: Now, you can't just hope to get Magnemite and coast your way to victory. Notice that the Rank went up on Electric-type.
Herpa derp! Slowly the monsters in that group rank up. Go too high and suddenly you're staring down a Zapdos. So obviously the tactic to use is mix it up a little.
Fire-types could be risky, but Dom will handle anything at rank1 no problem!
-%LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, I GIVE YOU. SHORTS KID.%-
TURTLE. BEATS. MONKEY.
Ladies and Gentlemen, Shorts kid. Let's give him a round of applause.
Choro Notes: Ghost types, sure. Dom has Crunch. This will be easy.
Lets kick some Electric-types up some.
Notice how not only are they getting better quality monsters but their levels are increasing.
THANKFULLY, you're healed after each match.
After 10 matches, that's one round. As opposed to the 7 of the other events.
Now, when you continue your streak? You keep your ranks until you actually lose. There is an interesting note about this event. If Lady were to try to enter Nevica or Campana it would give a warning that it would reset the streak. Streaks are based on the specific pokémon's SPECIES. If Lady had a second Torterra with different moves or abilities she could enter that and the streak would continue. This is a handy way of taking out problematic types.
. . . . IT'S ONE MONSTER.
Choro Notes: Shedinja
Speaking of problematic types, do NOT choose Bug or Ghost unless you have something super effective on it. Shedinja's Wonder Guard ability negates all damaging attacks that aren't super effective, however it only has one HP. Another option is poisoning or confusing it, or letting hail or sandstorm pick them off.
The game DOES like to mess with you at times, however. Say you bring a Fighting type and are beating up Normal-types. Guess what you just pulled out Girafarig. Normal/Psychic's a bitch! The Water/Grass Ludicolo likes to ruin fire-types picking on grass-types too.
After 50 consecutive wins this happens!
demanding a match with you.
Now, here's a neat quirk of the brain. You don't get to pick your type! You're completely up to the mercy of the rng!
favorite Pokémon.
Not at ALL.
Madame, if you knew how many "final challenges" I've faced you'd think of something much cooler to say.
Music: Emerald - Hoenn Frontier Brain Battle
Choro Notes: Argenta
Argenta's another one whose monster is always random, aside from the banned legendaries. You don't even get to pick the type!
Choro Notes: Sceptile
Sceptile is the final stage of Hoenn's grass-type starter, Treecko. They're lightning quick and can ruin things up with the razor-sharp leaves on their arms. Grass starter against Grass starter! Dom's at a slight disadvantage because he lacks the Grass-type resistance Sceptile has because of his ground-type!
JUST KEEP THE BITING GOING.
This is shaping up to be pretty bad.
Choro Notes: I'm not gonna lie I thought for sure she had that.
This is the first time confetti has fallen after a victory. I like this!
Choro Notes: Wisdom.
Points!
Eh.
Music: Platinum - Battle Castle
Choro Notes: The rest of the events you enter 3 monsters in. The Battle Castle is a strange one. You aren't healed after matches but you are granted Castle Points you can use to either buy items or heal with.
Nevica, Dom & Lyudmila should make a good trio.
What's with the paintings of the long-haired broad?
Oh my~
Choro Notes: Between matches you have the options to buff your own team or find things out about your opponents.
You can either identify or alter your opponents' levels. Raising their levels gives you more points and vice versa.
At the moment, all Lady can do is restore HP to a monster for 10 points. For 100 points she can rank up and unlock the ability to restore PP or rent higher quality items.
Wow I thought my place was nice.
Oh jeez, there's a voice on that one. What the hell was that accent? Where the hell is she from?
Choro Notes: SKIPPING AHEAD 20 FIGHTS. . .
This is a thing we did.
That. . . that's you, right?
I think I could take a butler, yeah.
Heya again.
Uhhh.
I've heard rumors there's a Carrie type thing going on there, any truth to th—ok that was a glare and I'm shutting up now.
How classy!
Music: HeartGold/SoulSilver - Raikou
Choro Notes: Darach
The monsters Darach uses in his rematch after 50ish battles are different from what he has here. He instead has an Entei and a Gallade in addition to his signature Empoleon.
Oh. Of course.
Please.
STOP.
I mean that was to be expected.
Choro Notes: Welcome to one of the most obnoxious items in the frontier!
OH GODDAMMIT. Reversal deals more damage the less HP it has remaining. At 1 HP, like it's at now, it has a base power of 200. Endure/Focus Sash and Reversal are a brutal combo.
I have no idea how you survived that, Lyudmila.
Oh right, penguins probably would eat octopus wouldn't they?
I was worried there, Penguin beats Turtle. D:
Your lady friend there is looking pretty miffed.
Hey wait.
Thank you
Points!
Music: Platinum - Battle Arcade
. . .
Choro Notes: Battle Arcade
The Battle Arcade is my favorite event (well it and the Hall).
Same team as last time.
Ok here's the fun part!
Random effect for the match! Blue tiles affect you, red tiles affect your opponent. Grey tiles affect both. Most of the symbols are self explanatory. The top row is "You get burnt, you get paralyzed, you get poisoned, you get a berry."
The implied affects of "We just injected your pokémon with poison/paralyzed your pokémon/lit fire on your pokémon" are kind of. . . yeah.
For the next 20 battles I just sort of got auto-hail for every match and let Nevica blizzard everything to death! Skip ahead!
a match with you.
Yeah sure why not.
What the hell was that?
What's it gonna be!
. . . . fuck I really wanted that burn or hail!
Music: Pokémon Stadium 2 - Elite Four Battle (Unused)
Choro Notes: Dahlia
Dahlia's title in the original version is "Roulette Goddess." Awesome. Fantina is a fan of her dancing! You can see her team here on the pre-battle shots. Her rematch team are Zapdos, Blaziken and Togekiss
Uh oh.
YEAH.
FUCK.
Choro Notes: Kinda annoyed I didn't plan for that Ludicolo!
Yeah whatever
Music: Diamond/Pearl - Battle Tower
Choro Notes: Battle Tower
The Battle Tower is as basic as it goes. 3vs3, Set battle. Get to 21, fight brain. I played this shit for over 2 hours because I got to battle 20 six times before I'd get fucked by the rng in the most blatant ways. Let's just skip to the end!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.
Yes. Finally.
Hey, Mr. Jorge's dad, yeah.
We're like the only people under 30 there, yes.
You got it Mr. J's D
Choro Notes: Palmer
Palmer is actually in Diamond/Pearl as well. He's Jorge's dad and he's also possibly the most unfair fight in the game. Check this out:
S-So much is explained.
This is not going to go well!!!!!!
With all due respect to my elders, Fuck you sir.
Choro Notes: Palmer's other two monsters are Rhyperior and Dragonite. I have NEVER landed a hit on his Dragonite without cheating.
His rematch? Regigigas. Heatran, Cresselia. Fuck. That. Dude.
Three out of five, I could have done a lot worse.