Part 23: Big Man With A Big Gun

Theo calls the jortsman to bring him up to date, and he'll come right over to give us something.


Fuck-

Fucking goddamn-

Okay so Gyarados's mega evolution is Water/Dark, but the best physical Dark move Gyarados had in X/Y was Bite. OR/AS changed this by giving it Crunch through level-up. Uranium does not do this.


I don't know if Dr. Jorts means this in the usual sense of emotional maturation or literally, since Theo sort of did age like 15 years all of the sudden.


Theo's dad possibly dying, being constantly turned down for being a kid, and constant losses to Good Human Hokage Dick Solomon have made him mature as a person who accepts being almost the best because, hey, he can make his fire yoshi turn around and make the sun shine even brighter, somehow.


That is the explanation Uranium uses for the power of Mega Evolution, so yeah we have a bond with Nuke-Nuke, a monster driven insane by nuclear radiation.


This is something about form changes? I don't care really.


Well I was wrong. Bamb'o acknowledges that we were captured by thugs and learned that Larkspur killed Mom more or less.

But it doesn't change anything.


Angelure isn't in the game. It isn't the location of the one gym that remains. It was planned for that, but then ninjas happened.

It's ostensibly planned, but the main team disbanded after the C&D and the new guys are more focused on bugfixes and quality of life improvements.


There's one power plant that hasn't exploded, and it's near Moon Wave. So we're going there-ish.


This requires yet another HM that isn't Fly.


Dig but Water, ho-hum. Every physically-slanted water-type in Tandor has picked up Aqua Tail by this point.


Tsukinami has the actual 8th gym, and it's south of Venisi.


You know what that means? Backtracking! Woo! I love doing sliding puzzles in reverse! Just kidding I hate it.


As I vaguely hinted earlier by getting his mega stone, My Fursona can mega-evolve. It gains a hefty boost to attack and fair boosts to defenses and speed. Its ability becomes Blood Lust, that draining thing that Vilucard has. This is fantastic, really. I can get a Moxie boost then mega evolve afterwards to enjoy +1 Drain Punches with extra drain.


In Silverport there's a suspicious boat-haver.


What a nice guy, that's where I need to go!


Unfortunately he says a pirate thing, and only pirates say pirate things!


No seriously he couldn't contain his swashbuckling and let slip he's a pirate.

I'm fine with this somehow.


Pirates use the same music as ninjas, which is a phrase I'm glad I could get to type.


This is a double battle so Duke Nukem yells it to death. New things: Mega Gyarados besides the whole "nuclear abomination" thing. Water/Dark, gets Mold Breaker to nail its nemesis, Rotom-Wash.

Swabone, ghost/fighting peg leg pirate ghost.


Haagross is some sort of eel. Posion/Electric, uses Goodra's hidden ability and Scolipede's sprite.


They have the most generic pirate name, sadly.


Well......





I finally checked the GTS and I did indeed get a Raptorch for my shiny Barand.


Of course it's evolution. Camerupt is slow while Archilles is fast, and Primal Groudon is the second best Pokemon in the univesre while Archilles is merely good. A non-mega Archilles has equal offenses but Flame Impact/Earthquake vs Fire Blast/Earth Power is a little lopsided in physical's favor, especially considering Belly Drum, Swords Dance, and Knock Off. Mega Archilles has +45 special attack but a sun-boosted Flame Impact is still completely bonkers.


I forget which day of the week I did this but it has the mega stone for my starter, and leftovers.

I bought the stone and a ton of leftovers.


The tinkerer's new item is the surfboard, which replaces Surf's out-of-battle function. Surf is at least a good move.

Unlike Dive.


Also Dick Solomon fuckin' surfs.


So My Fursona is now a woman with special attacks.


At least it still deals physical damage, right?


Just kidding, it's my own Dramsama, The Queen!


The Dramsamaite I got over a dozen updates ago goes to this thing. Since Illusion is one-and-done replacing it with a new ability is fine, and having a ton more special attack and speed is good.


Its new Ability is Bad Dreams, which deals 25% HP to sleeping opponents at the end of turn. It's Darkrai's signature ability in the official games, for good reason.


These darker spots that aren't forbidden to us by rocks are dive spots. It's like a weird door in the water that needs a bad move to navigate.


The underwater music is a weird distorted version of the Surf music. It's not its own track, the engine distorts the music. I imagine it sounds interesting with the normal surf music but I'm using Little Fury Things so it just sounds really fucking weird.

By the way, there's two pits in the Labyrinth, and this route and those are the only diving spots in the game.


The guy there is an underwater trainer, and he has some sort of worm sticking out of a hole. Lavent is... Lavent. Fire/Dragon.


Dramsama's only sleep-inducing move is Hypnosis, and that accuracy means you're taking a gamble on getting Bad Dreams to work.


Bug report: Bad Dreams displays the afflicted Pokemon's ability name.

Incidentally, Magma Armor halves the time it takes eggs to hatch. Flame Body does the same thing out-of-battle. Lavent, Raptorch, and Archilles are the only things with these abilities, so if you don't pick the fire starter, you have to wait until now to get something with a useful utility ability.

And it's a weird noodle.




This guy gives us this TM after beating him. It's like Psyshock but Water, because why have just Scald as extremely useful moves for water-types?


Snail Time is here and an Escartress now, by the way. Her entire job is to know Dive and Coral Break.

She does a great job.


This coral is indeed breakable with Coral Break. Breaking the coral with Coral Break gives you some items.


Like the four colored shards.


Or fire/water shrimp things. The name is because...


Its evolved form, Krilvolver, is a shrimp holding a gun.

In terms of designs that would never fly in official games, a Shrimp holding a gun probably is not kosher.

Two types and tiny special defense mean Hyper Voice obliterates it.


There's a tiny hole to the surface in the middle of this stuff.


It's to this island. It's not the only grass in the route but it is the only bell in Uranium.


And the only Poison Jab TM, unlike my two Toxics.


Good poison move. Poison guys without Gunk Shot take it, and it's useful coverage for things that really, really despise Fairies. Like My Fursona.


The grass has our own swabone.


Floatzels at a decent rate, and getting this thing to have a baby is a lot faster than the 1% rate at route 3.


And like the name indicates, Stenowatt is sorta here. It has Speed Boost, Tail Glow, and Baton Pass so it's also broken, but it's just so incredibly dull I can't really care.


Trying to go too far south gets us caught between two pirates.


The pirate we beat remembers us, and his ally is surprised that a kid blah blah blah


MORE PIRATES


Using two things that mega evolve at the same time seems like a bad plan, since I only get one a battle, but consider: I don't give a fuck.




I special attacker with a high power spread move? I am being defeated by my own technique!!




Foul Play is a good for things with low attack, but that's not My Fursona, who is a muscular baphomet of punching.


And then our ninja flunkies (because Dick Solomon is the new Hokage you understand) tell the pirates to fuck off. Dick Solomon and the ninjas are all on surfboards, by the way.





Tsukinami's map space square is a lot bigger than the actual village.


But here's the dock, and... well that's next time.