Part 11: Nelde Ruins, Part 3

oh way to bury the update you blunderous oafs

IT'S ON PAGE FOUR, FOLKS. WE FOUGHT A BOSS AND STUFF IT WAS TOTALLY SWEET.

Edit: Actually, I'm just going to move it forward, because that's quite a lot of images on one page. POST RESERVED. BEAR WITH ME.




I apologise profusely if any images appear to be missing from this post. It's that time of the month and WaffleImages is acting up. I think I caught all the broken ones, but just be warned.




There was a glint of light over there.
Where?
Maybe it's a jewel!
Maybe.
Let's search the floor!
We should really keep moving.
Let's search the floor!
No, let's not.
Let's search the floor!
Listen. We've already wasted enough time getting through that stupid maze and making our way back here. We need to-
Let's search the floor!


So, yeah. Every time you try to leave this area, be it by moving forward or going back the way you came, Lina just interrupts with "Let's search the floor!" because she has an obsessive need to hunt down anything and everything that could reasonably be considered loot. Which, on reflection, I'm kind of a hypocrite for complaining about.

Let's search the floor!



The ground is shaking!
It's because we all stood in the same place. The floor is weak here.
Lina? Whatever horrible event is about to transpire here is entirely your fault. I just want you to know, before you die a miserable death along with the rest of us, that our blood stains both your hands and your soul. You are literally a murderer. Take this knowledge with you to the abyss, and let it be your torment.





Wow, Ein. Overreact much?
This means nothing. We are already dead, riddled with a thousand lacerations betwixt us, and it is Lina's hand that holds the dreadful knife. It is only a matter of time, and time is as ephemeral and fleeting as our lives have become in the face of her avarice.


Oddly enough, the results of failing this minigame (and thus falling through the floor) aren't all bad; on one hand, you miss out on a lot of goodies, but on the other hand, it's quite a shortcut, and you also get the following CG to add to your collection:



I love this picture. Lina and Serene are screaming at the top of their lungs, but Fia's just like "Oh hey, I guess we're plummeting to our deaths? Alright then." Furthermore, if you look closely at Cierra, she seems to have an eyebrow raised at Serene, as if to say "Wait, what are you worried about?"



I'm also dubbing this the "Monroe knee-drop". OFF THE TURNBUCKLE! OOOH YEAH!





This egg looks different. We should take it with us!



Must...destroy...shiny egg...
What is wrong with you?!
Someone just take the damn thing before Ein snuffs out yet another life for no discernible reason.
You're one to talk, you-
THAT SQUIRREL HAD IT COMING. GET OFF MY BACK.





By the look of this statue, this is the Royal Tomb.
So it was a pretty important place, huh?
The kings of Binon were laid to rest here. See? Here's the royal seal.






...

See, this is like something *I* would have written, except it's actually in the game. Stop stealing my thunder, Ein!

The chest is trapped, but it also contains either a Rose Whip, a Harpie Talon, an Ogre Blade, or a FlamBERGE.

(i'm sorry i thought i wouldn't have to do this anymore i SWEAR there'll be no more flamBERGES after we're out of this dungeon)



Incidentally, the traps start to get significantly worse at this point. The regular stuff (arrow traps, poison gas and freeze gas) just damages you, and, in the case of freeze gas, makes you lose several turns; you can still get the treasure afterwards. However, it's now also possible to come across "magic locks", which will permanently seal the chest unless you disable them in time. Worse yet, the chest can explode, which damages you AND deprives you of the loot.

The next trap up deletes your saved games, and the next one causes your GBA to melt.



OK. First of all, those "Things" are quite obviously pink, not white. Secondly, how come all these statues are of dragons? I thought this was supposed to be a royal tomb? Or were people just dragons back then? Are you trying to suggest that people evolved from dragons, Sting? Because I refuse to believe that anything could conceivably evolve from a dragon. Once you hit "dragon", the only way to move forward is "cybernetically enhanced dragon".


Look! Butterflies!
These are Amberets. They like to bathe in refracted light. There must be a crystal around here.



Let's catch one.
Are you gonna ask them where the crystal is?



Sometimes you need to do things like this, not for some future purpose, but simply for the poetry of the moment. In capturing this tiny, delicate creature, I am making a bold, yet subtly profound statement.
What's that?
Butterflies suck. I rule.







I eat so much goddamned spinach. So much. Butterflies haven't got shit on me.
Truly you are the William Wordsworth of our generation.
haha this butterfly doesn't even know WHAT THE FUCK


(If you choose "Search" instead, the butterflies disappear, but you find 50 Ruby Staffs. Not a bad reward, but we've already got enough of them to last us for this dungeon. And then we will be getting a better staff. So there.)



Look, a statue.
Should we check it out?



Really, if ever you're trying to examine something and are subsequently asked "Are you sure you want to do that?" by way of dialogue, you should just go ahead and assume you're going to get fucked.



It's safer in the long run.



I want to S-rank the skeletons, so I need to make sure that those ghosts die first. To do that, I will need long-range attackers. Thus, Lina and Cierra.



However, in terms of actually winning the battle, this is not a good strategy. The skeletons are the real danger, because they love to poison you. Poison is BAD. No matter how weak your enemies may be compared to you, poison will always knock a steaming great wodge of health off the victim every turn.



But hey, we have the Rosary. That cures everyone's status ailments, so what's the problem?

The problems are twofold. First, you're just going to get poisoned again immediately after you cure it, so it's an exercise in futility. Secondly, each turn you spend curing status ailments is a turn you don't spend attacking, and you can't afford to waste time if you're going for an S-rank.

The rancid dressing on this awful salad is that the ghosts' attacks can put you to sleep, rendering you unable to act. Again, very bad when you need to finish your enemies off as quickly as possible.



We still pulled it off, though. Partly because Cierra is crazy powerful, but mostly because I'm just awesome like that.

A book also appears on the ground after the battle. I don't know if I mentioned this already, but I have a RAPACIOUS, GARGANTUAN BONER FOR BOOKS.

You know, figuratively.






I forgot to take a screenshot before I opened the chest here. You'll just have to take my word that we got a Harpie Talon from it!


The wall's cracked here. Someone hand me a bomb.
...we don't have any bombs.
Someone hand me a bombchu.
We don't have bombchus.
Someone hand me a bomb flow-
look it's not going to get any funnier just stop



Don't quote me on this, but I think this is the only point in the game where you have to beat a minigame in order to progress.

And it happens to be a button mashing one.

A CONVERSATION AT THE OFFICES OF STING ENTERTAINMENT:


(Actually, to be fair, you can still beat this one even if you press at a fairly leisurely pace.)





The floor's all sticky here.
That's because it's made of hyphae.



EIN IS A DICK: Really, with all the deadly poisonous crap we've come across thus far, it's as much Lina's fault for believing that the potentially toxic fungus strands are a sort of natural candy floss as it is Ein's fault for saying it.

Still, though.


I wanna try some!
No, don't!
Ein! That was spiteful and uncalled for!
High five!
No, "hyphae."
Hifay?
Hyphae.
Hifi?
Hyphae.
Hyphae?
Hyphae!
HYPHAE



Unfortunately, our cruelty does end in us having to fight a couple of Acid Jellies. Karma strikes!



Fortunately, these enemies go down like a cheap, gooey, highly corrosive hooker as long as you use ice attacks, and we happen to have just the tools for the job.






oh look another egg
Don't break it! I'm serious!
but moooooom
No! No more egg-slaying!
man



Oh hey, another applecot. We don't want or need it, but hell, let's have Serene fly up and get it anyway.





HOW IS YOUR BUTT SERENE
...what?
YOUR BUTT
PLEASE APPRISE ME OF ITS CURRENT STATUS








I...








OK, I'm just going to pretend I didn't hear that. And that you don't exist.
INQUIRING MINDS NEED TO KNOW SERENE
I'm more angry with the bird than I am with you. That's the only reason you're still breathing.


(seriously ein what the hell

i mean there's being a dick and then there's being a fucking creepy troglodyte)



Anyway. In a battle with a single enemy, you can pretty much just use Disaresta right away and win unless it's a really tough one. And it wasn't. So we did!

We can't go any further in this direction, so let's backtrack to the hyphae chambers.





I don't know why these enemies are called "Giant Beetles" when they're obviously woodlice of some description, but alright.



Oh, I see. Gonna play it like that, are you? Think you're clever? You are not clever and this is why.





Honestly, Cierra's Over Skills might as well all be called "FUCK YOU."



What's that up there?
I'll take a look at it.
And by "take a look at", I mean "bisect".


(I know you're probably thinking that I'm exaggerating Serene's violent tendencies for comic effect here, but I'm not. She seriously just flies up and slices the damn thing with no prompting or provocation, before anyone can even protest. I'm telling you, she's nuts.)



Is that a beehive?!
For god's sake, Serene! Could you possibly think before you murder just for once?
OK, so we'll get stung a few times. Boo-frickety-hoo. We'll live.
Actually, these are Kredna bees. Their sting is often fatal.
...oh.



Succeeding takes us back to the previous screen. Oh, most insignificant of annoyances!



REWARDED FOR STUPID CRAP: OK, so after angering a swarm of killer bees and narrowly escaping a horrible death-of-a-thousand-stings, the first thing we do upon coming back is pick up their hive and put it in our pocket. And somehow this doesn't end in a tragic re-enactment of Nicolas Cage's finest performance.

That said, I am admittedly hesitant to call the Beehive item a "reward." Let's take a look.



Everyone has the same skill; "Bee Assault". This has the Fix-DM property, which means that each hit will always inflict the exact amount of damage that is written. 8 hits, 8 damage = 64 total damage.

That in itself is pretty awful, but it goes far beyond just being useless. On top of that, it has the "Revolt" property, which means there's a decent chance that the attack will hit the character using the item, rather than the enemy.

The only thing the Beehive is good for is comedy value, because everyone says a line before they use it which is something to the effect of "These things had better not sting me" which will inevitably be followed by "OH GOD WHY ARE THEY STINGING ME"

With that in mind, unless you're in dire need of some laughs or just plain suicidal, it's better not to use the beehive. Therefore, we're just going to have Cierra burn the damn thing and get rewarded for sensible crap for once.



No! Not the bees!
It looks like these bees...
...just lost their sting.
That was average at best. And those are MY sunglasses.





Ahhh! I'm falling! I must articulate this because it is happening offscreen!
Cierra!



Oh, thank you. I wasn't paying attention.
I was just worried that you might cause an earthquake when you landed.
...
Because you are extremely heavy.














that is the joke










Once again, Ice attacks are very much the order of the day here. Basically just spam the Ogre Blade until the two lizardmen are dead, then hit the wyrm with a Disaresta.


Easy!

Also, I was curious about what you got for S-ranking the lizardmen, so I tried it out. Turns out they drop Ice Javelins and I was wrong about it being a unique item.

I am terribly sorry for misleading you all in such a fashion, and I hope you can find it in your hearts to forgive me.


Let's hope the wind doesn't pick up again.
Don't worry. I can catch anyone who falls.
Yeah, but will you?
Maybe.
But what if we all fall at the same time?
Then I guess you're screwed.
And I do mean you. Specifically.



A mana wisp!



You get an affection boost from whichever girl you assign to the task. Note that Ein refuses to do it himself despite the fact that it's right in front of him. (It's a little hard to see against the backdrop, but trust me, it's there.)

Incidentally, as nice as it is to receive universal stat boosts, it is a little annoying how the game thinks it's necessary to tell you about each and every one of them individually. Imagine reading this:


Except you have to press a button to move to each new line, and you can't skip over it. That's what it's like.






The empty shell is...well, empty, so let's take a look at that ivy.


This is Kerlu, also known as Slumber Ivy. One whiff of its sap can induce sleep.



Oddly enough, the second option doesn't raise Cierra's affection. Here is my theory as to why.


You're really smart.
It's common knowledge. Don't be a brown-noser.
But-
SYCOPHANTS BURN NICE AND PRETTY



See, this is why I don't bother trying to be nice.
We should take some with us. It might be useful.
Good point. Hold on.



HUUUUUURGH!
No good. I can't pull it out with these roots in the way.
What should we do?
Um...just cut it off?
An enemy could appear at any moment. Maybe we should just move on.
OR we could just cut it.
Maybe if we all pull at the same time, it'll work!
It's worth a try.
Seriously. I have a scythe right here. It'd take half a second.
Let's do it! Team spirit!
Yeah!
wait NO
GOD DAMN YOU





I know I said in an earlier post that the Slumber Ivy isn't really worth bothering with, but that was before we had Cierra in the party. Now we can put every enemy in a battle to sleep by whipping the shit out of them. I like that. I think I'll keep this.



Someone needs to tell these guys that garbing yourself in the pelt of a dangerous beast only makes you look intimidating when you aren't a skinny girlman.



Anyway, this battle's easy enough to S-rank. The two dudes in the back are weak to Lightning, so have Fia and Lina stand in the back and pelt them with the Lightning Bow while Ein whacks the ape. Once you've whittled them down a bit, a Disaresta can finish them all at once.



Next screen!



This shell isn't empty and the game is a liar. However, it might as well be, because it contains the Harpie Plume item.

What this does is raise the Wait gauge of a nearby party member. Not an enemy; a party member. As in, someone on your side. Someone whom you want to be able to act as often as possible.

What is the point? At least the Beehive has a chance of working in your favour, for all the difference it makes. This thing literally has no purpose but to sabotage you. Why create an item like that?! Nobody would ever use this unless they completely misunderstood what it did! And that is entirely possible because the descriptions are so short and vague! It's terrible! Sting is terrible!



Another empty shell. It's much larger than a Pelga egg.
Maybe it's from a really big Pelga?
Oh, did I not explain? These are wyrm eggs.
You mean one of those flying creatures?
Yes.
Those carnivorous, Sprite-eating...
Yes.


This conversation actually happens. The bird eggs were bad enough, but now we're expected to believe that these things:



Were laid by one of these?



Do they have a TARDIS in their cloaca or something? What the fuck?

Chest contains an Ogre Blade, Harpie Talon or Rose Whip, by the by.





Let us sing a song of ice and fire! The wyrm is vulnerable to the former and the harpie is weak against the latter. Thus, Serene and Cierra are your go-to girls.



It's so shiny and pretty!
It is an unusual feather...
Lina wants it!



Doesn't matter which of the first two you choose, because Lina and Fia will do it anyway.


Almost there...
Lina! Don't stand so close to the edge!
I got it!
Waaah!
Aaaaah!





Ugh...I'm cold, and covered in mud.
You dragged me in too.
Sorry.
I hate to say it, but Ein might actually be right. Your greed really is going to get us killed one of these days.
My only crime is loving loot too much!





You know, one would think Fia's talking about a bath here, but to me, this sounds (and looks) way too much like a threat for it to be something as innocent as that.



Oh, you're ba-
...um. You know, if you're going to take time off to mud wrestle, that's fine, but at least let me know in advance. I could have sold tickets.
Take feather. Shut mouth.



Just one more screen to climb. Nothing more stands between us and the boss.

Let's get it done.



Sprites? Awooooo...and that scent...one from Asgard?
Prepare to be sealed away, demon!
And by "sealed away" I mean "killed", because that's what we're actually doing and honestly we're not fooling anyone.
You dare threaten me? Who are you?
My name is Ein, and I am a Grim Angel!
Awoooo...an angel has come? Why do you wish to banish me?
To protect Riviera.
Asgard moves for such foolish reasons?
It's not a foolish reason!
That's right!
Awooo-
OK, seriously. What the hell is that? Is that supposed to be a roar, or are you about to start singing Thriller? Because if it's the latter, cool, go for it. I like a bit of MJ. But if it's the former, cut it out. It's not scary. It's not intimidating. You just sound like a Chihuahua getting an enema. Stop.









You will die first, mouthy one.





Viddler-type Boss Battle | DailyMotion-type alternative








We came all this way and we still haven't found Gateau. It might be too late...
Don't say that! We'll reunite you two! Right, Ein?
We'll take another look on the way down.



Hm? I heard something! Gateau, is that you?!



Gateau! I'm so glad you're safe!
Rose?!
Meow?! (Ein?!)
Holy crap! It IS you! I-
...wait. When did you start calling yourself "Gateau"? And more importantly, when did you start saying "Meow"?
Meow-meow! Meow! (It's that crazy broad with the hat! She force-fed me some weird potion and now I can't talk properly!)
I found the poor thing injured in the forest, so I nursed it back to health. Since then, we've been best friends.
Meow! (No, see, best friends don't ruin each others' larynxes with vile alchemy.)
That's great, Cierra.
*hiss* (Nor do they plan to scratch out each other's eyes as revenge.)
Wow! It's like you're talking to the cat!
...god, now I'm going to have to pretend that I can't actually communicate with you, aren't I?
Meow, meow me-ow. (Ask the wicked witch over there how long my voice is going to be like this.)
Um...Cierra? About that medicine you gave "Gateau"...how long is it going to last?
I have no idea.
MEOW (WHAT)
Well, to tell you the truth, I actually know Gateau.
MEOW (DESTROY HER)
We used to travel with each other.
Is that so? Well, that explains it. I'm glad that you're together again. Isn't that wonderful, Gateau?
MEOW (DON'T MOCK ME)
So what are you going to do, Cierra? Won't it be hard for Gateau to choose between you and Ein?
Meow. (Oh yeah. Lifelong friend and partner, or complete stranger who freakin' poisoned me. Real difficult choice there, brainchild.)
That won't be an issue. I'd like to come along with you all, if that's alright?
Meow. (No.)
Sounds good to me. Welcome aboard.
Meow meow. (That is a very odd way of saying "no".)






And so, a (mostly) happy conclusion to the mystery of Gateau. Where will the fickle hand of fate lead our heroes next?

Probably to the next chapter!





---NEW ITEMS---
Book of Nanai: Book-type weapon. Ice damage.
Estoc: Rapier-type weapon. Physical damage.
Wyvern Wing: Misc. weapon. Removes a single enemy from battle.


Tempest Bow: One-shot boss weapon.
Giga Drive
Effect: Four-hit Magic combo, power of 405. Lightning damage.
Target: Random enemies.
Additional: Piercing.

Gigantic Bolt
Effect: Single attack, power of 607. Lightning Damage.
Target: Enemy with lowest Wait.


Yeah, for some reason, Fia's got a better attack with the Tempest Bow than Lina. I cannot imagine why!




---NEW OVER SKILLS---

---LEVEL 2---
Un Trois
Item: Estoc
Effect: Four-hit Attack combo, power of 88.
Target: Nearest enemy.
Additional: Piercing.



---LEVEL 1---
Eis Rune
Item: Book of Nanai
Effect: Single Magic attack, power of 130.
Target: All enemies.
Additional Unavoidable, unblockable.


---LEVEL 3---
Presto
Item: Estoc
Effect: Five-hit Attack combo, power of 74.
Target: Nearest enemy.
Additional: Not-Vit.



---LEVEL 2---
Violent Blizzard
Item: Book of Nanai
Effect: Three-hit Attack combo, power of 101.
Target: Random enemies.
Additional: Unavoidable. May cause additional ice damage.



---LEVEL 1---
Hell Stinger
Item: Estoc
Effect: Single attack, power of 190.
Target: Nearest enemy.
Additional: Piercing. Low accuracy.

---LEVEL 2---
High Tension
Item: Power Wrist
Effect: Raises Strength in exchange for HP.
Target: Self.

Wind Cutter
Item: Wyvern Wing
Effect: 25% HP damage.
Target: Front Row
Additional: Unavoidable.



---LEVEL 1---
Punish
Item: Estoc
Effect: Two-hit Magic combo, power of 100.
Target: Nearest enemy.
Additional: Piercing.


---LEVEL 2---
Frigid Zone
Item: Book of Nanai
Effect: Single Magic attack, power of 186.
Target: All enemies.
Additional: Unavoidable, unblockable.

Snapping Rose
Item: Rose Whip
Effect: Three-hit Attack combo, power of 71.
Target: Front row.
Additional: Extra damage against beasts. Not-Vit.







BOOOONESAW IS REEEADYYYY