Part 14: Tetyth, Part 2

MY HEART CRIES OUT FOR A TENDER EMBRACE
















...yeah, I don't think anyone's buying it.
Bah.



SHIT!
(Just kidding.)
...
(We've got thirty-eight.)
...
(Thirty-seven.)
Sometimes I wonder why I keep you around. I really do.
(Noted. Thirty-six.)



Since there wasn't anything particularly interesting about this battle, I'd like to mention a little something that I noticed during it.





At this point, Ein's stats are universally lower than Serene's.

Some protagonist he is. Yeah, he's got a few more hit points, but that's balanced out by his lower Vitality. If it weren't for Disaresta, he'd practically be obsolete! What right does he have to be a mandatory character in every battle?



Anyway, there's nothing else to be had in this area, and we can get through this door now that we have the Rusty Key. Let's move.



(What's that?)
Hm?
It looks like something's being reflected in the water. It must be in that window.



Let's take a look. It might be important.
How are we to search such a small hole?
Hey Rose. Any chance you could check it out?
(No way. I don't do water.)
You don't have to "do water". Just fly over.
(I also don't do asinine errands.)
Might I suggest an alternative?
...I'm listening.




Some time later...





Serene. Seriously. It's been half an hour. If she was going to fit, it would have happened by now. Just forget it.
No! We've come too far to quit now! Hand me the Vaseline!
You already used it all.
Maybe if we cut her pigtails off...



(Oh, for god's sake. Look, if it really means that much to you, I'll do it.)
Thank you.



(There. It's a Mana Wisp. Happy? You guys want to stick around for the incoming watery death now, or should we get going?)
Damn it, Lina! You and your stupid, unmalleable skull have made me look like an idiot! I suggest you sleep lightly from now on.
For your information, I haven't slept at all from the minute you joined.
Hmph. Maybe you're smarter than I gave you credit for, then.



(Did anyone hear that...?)
Whoa!



YES INDEED THANK YOU FOR THAT TIMELY WARNING





(Wow. I never thought I'd end up saying this to you, but that was actually fairly impressive.)
Hell yeah! I'm untouchable!



Ow.
(Aaaand there's the return to form.)
Don't worry! I'll get 'em!



Ow!
Oops!



What the fuck?!
I was feeling left out.



Never?
Never!
That's odd, considering you missed Ein three times in a row back there.
...





You're good at that.
No I'm not.
...wait, wh-





tee hee
Great. Thanks. Anyone else want to maim me while we're at it? Perhaps Cierra would like to set me on fire again?
*sniff*
(I'll stick to wounding your pride. But thanks for offering.)


For S-ranking the archers, you get a brand new bow with 15 charges, which seems like a good reward...until about two seconds later, when a chest appears on the screen containing exactly the same bow with 40 charges.



Yay for loot that gets dropped in your lap being better than loot that required actual effort to obtain!

(also did anyone notice that that chick's name was cecil)



Now, what's this? It's too dark to see inside...
It looks like a small storage room. Or a closet.
I'm going to take a look. Be right back.



Welcome, child. Why not step into my sleigh? I'll give you some Turkish Delight.
...



What'd you find?
Paedophiles.


OK, so you don't really get to go to Narnia. But you do find a Crystal Key, which we'll be using to open...



...this door.

(That is, after we open the chest.)







Meanwhile...





Time to commence the plan.
Commencing our plan.
We'll beat Ein with our Golem.
We'll make mincemeat out of him!



Ahh!
What're you doing?
I dropped the manual...
Idiot! Without the manual, we can't control it!
Sorry...
Well, never mind. We've already activated it, and I am perfectly confident that this will NOT come back to bite us in the ass.
...
...
We're screwed, aren't w-
Yes. And it's your fault.





This is another one of those damned wyrms that will blow you back to an earlier screen if you let it use its Break Out. It's twice as annoying here as it was the first time, because at least in Lacrima Castle you could get an extra scene and a key item out of the arrangement, and you also didn't have an instant death timer ticking away.

We're not going to let him have his way, though. Why not sit back and listen to the miniboss music while I explain how to S-rank this sucker?



First, we use a Power Wrist to boost everyone's Strength.



After that, we start whittling him down with single-attack weapons. Weapons that deal multiple hits, such as rapiers or staffs, will just build his Rage Gauge more quickly.



If he accumulates too much Rage, we start spamming the Power Wrist instead of attacking. Not only does this give him time to cool off, it has the added bonus of giving us additional (smaller) boosts to our Strength, allowing us to deal the finishing blow that much faster.



Of course, he can dish out quite a bit of damage himself, which is why we brought some Emergency Bread. Also, since his attacks always target the nearest character, we put two people in the front row so that the damage gets split between them, rather than one character having to soak it all up.



The end is at hand! The wyrm's resistant to Physical, Lightning and Holy damage, so Serene's Burning Sun Over Skill is the best option here. Doesn't hurt that she's the strongest character, either.





Job's a good 'un!



Something's blowing in the wind.



Well caught. What is it?



TOSSED
What? Why?
Because it's an instruction manual. If I read it, I am officially no longer a man.
Just pass it here, then.
PASSED





Ropes?
They don't seem to lead anywhere.
Lina smells loot!



I guess we should pull one, then.
Wait wait wait. We're not doing that.
What?
Trust me, I'm an expert on loot and I know how these things work. If we pull one rope, we're going to miss whatever we'd get for pulling the other two.
So what do we do, then?
Think outside the box! If the three of us grab one rope each and pull at the same time, we can get triple the treasure!
That's...actually not a bad idea.
Let's do it! What could possibly go wrong?
Um...I think I'm just going to step outside for a little bit.
(Me too.)
Cowards! DESERTERS! Your shares are forfeit!











Ready?
Set...
Pull!















...nothing's happening.
...
Are you sure there was treasure here to begin with?
Yes! The scent of loot is unmistakable!



Oh hey, there we go.
Told you.



Uh...



Oh crap.





Did it work?
Run! For the love of all that is holy, RUN!





















SOMEBODY HELP!







The fuck...?







Dear lord, what have we wrought?!
THIS IS THE GREATEST APOCALYPSE EVER































So I guess we should pull one, then. Note my careful use of the term "one". As in "singular".
_{The principle was sound.}


OK! Here's what actually happens. If you pull the middle rope, a barrel falls on Ein's head and he loses some hit points. If you pull the left rope, a beehive drops and you have to play a minigame to avoid getting stung. You also get a note from the Red Sage (one of the androgynous mummies we saw earlier) that says "Bee-envenido a Tetyth!"

Kind of makes you groan and chuckle at the same time. Or maybe that's just me.

Also, if you come back and pick it up, you get the Killer Beehive item. Unlike the regular Beehive, this is actually ridiculously powerful, inflicting a total of 704 points of damage. Of course, since it can still backfire, that just makes it even more of a double-edged sword.

We opted for the right rope, which gets us...



We can also pick up the rope afterwards, which we do.



There's that villain!
Who goes there?! (He actually says this. Look at him trying to sound all dramatic.)
The Red Sage!
And the Blue Fool!
Are here!
Heeeere
You were out of sync again!
Whoops.
All that practice for nothing!
I'm sorry!
...we're going to get to kill these two, right?
What's done is done. Anyway. Villainous bully of demons! We will destroy you!
BRING IT ON YOU GIRLY MAN GIRL THING
Not you! Him!
Me?
Of course you!
Ah. "Villainous bully." I see. Well, if it helps my defence at all, I was attacked first on, oh, EVERY SINGLE GODDAMNED OCCASION.
What about that guard in Lacrima?
...thanks, Fia.
Or the ape in the Nelde Ruins?
Thanks, Fia.
Enough! Show them your power, Fool!
I'll do my best!



_{(here's the real miniboss music)}



We're going to be Power Wristing it up again here, because hey, why not.

It doesn't really make you go blind, you know.

Scythes target the front row, so the Burning Sun will take down those hammer bros. quickly enough. Perhaps a little too quickly, because we build up enough Rage to get targeted with a Break Out right away.



Fortunately, that's exactly what I was counting on. With our Overdrive bar maxed out from the assault, we can now counter with an Over Skill of our own.





That, in turn, maxes out his Rage bar again, which gets us hit with another Break out, which maxes out our Overdrive bar, and thus commences an ENDLESS CYCLE OF BLOODY VENGEANCE.



(Not really.)

If Lina uses the Blue Bomber, it does 50% damage and may remove the target from battle outright. Another item that'd be great if it worked on bosses. We won't be keeping it.

also cierra has some front row ice attack with it i guess

By the way, feel free to insert the Megaman joke of your choice here.



You are villains...you're ALL villains!
WAAAH HOW DARE YOU DEFEND YOURSELVES WAAAH
More water's coming. You can all drown!
WAAAAAH




---NEW ITEMS---
Banango: Support Item. 55% HP restoration.
Elfin Bow: Bow-type weapon. Physical damage.
Wyrm Wing: Miscellaneous weapon. May remove enemies from battle.


---NEW OVER SKILLS---


---LEVEL 1---
Rising Shot
Item: Elfin Bow
Effect: Single attack, power of 203.
Target: Nearest enemy.
Additional: Piercing.



---LEVEL 1---
Piercing Arrow
Item: Elfin Bow
Effect: Three-hit Attack combo, power of 117.
Target: Enemy with lowest HP.
Additional Extra damage against air enemies.



---LEVEL 1---
Banana Slugger
Item: Banango
Effect: 55% HP damage.
Target: Back row.
Additional: Removes all remaining Banangos from inventory.


---LEVEL 3---
Voltage Raid
Item: Elfin Bow
Effect: Give-hit Attack combo, power of 124.
Target: Random enemies.
Additional: Extra damage against air enemies.



---LEVEL 2---
Wind Hazard
Item: Wyrm Wing
Effect: 35% HP damage.
Target: All enemies.
Additional: Unavoidable.



---LEVEL 1---
Thunder Arrow
Item: Elfin Bow
Effect: Three-hit Magic combo, power of 90.
Target: Random enemies.


























Our arrows will blot out the Sun!
Then we will fight in the shade!



...on second thought, this might have worked better if we had shields.