Part 26: Yggdrasil, Part 1

I have to say, I was expecting Yggdrasil to be a little less...
Dark?
I was going to say "cramped", but yeah, that too.
Whoever's hand that is, they'd better take it elsewhere if they want it to stay attached.
I can't even move!
Please don't start, you two. We have to stay focused if we're going to catch up with Ledah.
Oh yeah, mom? Well while you're at it, maybe you can tell us how we're supposed to catch up with anyone in this state, focused or not.
...I'm still working on that.
(So. You do realise that you're in the wrong tree, right?)








You could have said something earlier.
(And deprived myself of an afternoon's entertainment? Sure. I could have.)





Ein and his companions journey to the holy domain of Yggdrasil, and in an effort to stop Ledah, the party steps into the tree of light.

While Ledah aims to actuate the Retribution, Ein struggles desperately to prevent it.

The two angels continue to walk their own paths, although those paths appear to diverge even further.





What should we do?! He destroyed it!
The black-winged angel's coming. I'm scared...



To stop the intruder, I have released the ones that destroy all.
You can't mean...?!
Yes. I'm afraid I do.
...I can't believe it's come to this.
We have little choice. We must stave off the angel until Ein arrives, by any means necessary. I just pray that he will make it in time...







Well, this is a bit more like it.
Amazing...to think that a place like this was right under our noses all this time.
You know, now that you mention it, the World Tree has always been in Elendia, right? And you obviously knew about it. So what exactly did you think it was?
I always assumed it was just a tourist trap.
Yeah. There used to be plans to sell World Tree t-shirts and mugs and stuff.
"Used to be"?
Yes. Unfortunately, it never took root.
...
Oh, come on. That wasn't bad.
No, it really was.



Demons!
How did demons manage to invade this place?
I don't think they are demons. These are different, somehow.
Wait. They couldn't be...?
ALL OBJECTIONABLE MATERIAL SHALL BE EXCISED
The Censors! I knew it!
The what?
I hear Yggdrasil has its own defence mechanism. These Sprites, the Censors, are part of that system. I never thought I'd see them for myself...
YOUR LOW-CUT DRESS IS OFFENSIVELY LASCIVIOUS
What?!
HAVE YOU CONSIDERED WEARING AN ABAYA
Pardon me, everyone. I've got some piggies to roast.



The succubus will drop a Silver Moon if you S-rank her, which is just as well considering I broke the last one in the fight against Death. We can't have Serene going scythe-less. That'd be all kinds of wrong.



Also, this guy is a turtling bastard and I hate his garishly coloured face. I almost didn't get my S-rank because that little hellion was blocking so much.



Almost.

Luckily there's only one of these in the game, so that's one annoyance we won't have to deal with anymore.



Ein? When we find Ledah, do you think we'll be able to talk him down?
Probably not. There's no worry of Ragnarok anymore, but I doubt he's going to take my word for that.
Then what are you going to do?
Beat it into him. Duh.
...well, I'm glad to see you've thought ahead, at least.
Ahhhh!
Whuh?



Someone's here!
Run! If they catch you, who knows what'll happen!
Wait a second! We're not-
Go go go!



Welp. They're either gonna run into Ledah or one of those Censor things. Either way, two less fairies in the world.
Why is that a good thing?!
'Cause I don't like fairies. Small. Annoying. Whiny. Nasally, high-pitched voices. Getting in the way and making a nuisance of themselves. Any of this sounding familiar?
I do not have a nasally voice!
Whoa there! Don't be shouting like that. You'll give yourself a nosebleed.



Hmm. If the Censors are here to defend Yggdrasil, they'll be attacking Ledah too, won't they? Perhaps we won't have to fight him after all.
Not a chance. Trust me, Ledah won't be beaten by these guys. I doubt they'll even slow him down, to be honest.



Meanwhile...




Fucking woodlice!
HARSH LANGUAGE OFFENDS MY SENSIBILITIES
THAT WEAPON IS ENTIRELY TOO PHALLIC
YOUR ANDROGYNOUS APPEARANCE MAY CAUSE PEOPLE TO QUESTION THEIR ORIENTATION
THINK OF THE CHILDREN. DESTROY HIM FOR THE CHILDREN.





Well, it was just a thought.


There are two things to examine on this screen, both of which exist solely to WASTE YOUR TP.

In fact, you'll be seeing an awful lot of that in Yggdrasil. I mean, all the dungeons contain a few things to examine that don't have any purpose, but in Yggdrasil, it seems like there's one on every single screen. Sometimes more than one. And quite often, Ein has exactly the same line for all of them. At least give us a funny conversation to read or something.

Anyway. Let's move on.



Serene? What are you doing?
Shh. I saw something moving over here.
Whoa!



Oh. You again.



Would you calm down? I'm not gonna eat you.
You can't fool us! You're a demon! Those wings and that ugly face are proof!
I changed my mind. Who's up for some fairy fricassée?
Oh, fairy meat isn't suitable for fricassée at all. It's much too delicate to withstand stewing. Completely goes to pieces.



...it's...just something I read about once.
Just ignore them, you two. We all came here to save Yggdrasil, so you don't have to be afraid of-
...I mean, there's no reason to run away from-
...
Fia?
Shh. I'm trying to think of a way to say this without lying.
...maybe we should go.
Alright, look. However miserably we're failing at it, the important thing is that we're trying to talk to you. That alone makes us less of a threat than everything else here is.
He's got a point.
Can you take us to our friend, then?
It's too dangerous to go by ourselves. Please?



Sure.
Oh goody. Everything that irritates me about Lina, now in triplicate. Just what I always wanted.
We're not going to be coming with you, lady.
Yeah. Just because we trust everyone else doesn't mean we trust you.
WHY YOU LITTLE...
...alright. I guess that's justified. But that doesn't mean I'm not angry about it.
We'll hide inside your clothes, mister, so be careful.
Uh...



*giggle* It's so warm in here.
...could we maybe bring the Censors back for a second?







YOU WILL SUBMIT TO THE ESRB
Ahhh! More Censors! Get them!












DUDE
i swear to god this isn't what you think
ARE YOU SERIOUSLY KEEPING FAIRIES INSIDE YOUR TROUSERS
THAT'S JUST
UGH
GOD
It's not like that! I'm only doing this to keep them safe from you!
SO WHAT YOU'RE SAYING IS
YOU ARE HIDING THEM IN YOUR PANTS TO GET THEM PAST THE CENSORS
Yes.
No!
Shut up!



It might not look like it, but all of these guys are vulnerable to holy damage. You've probably worked this out for yourselves by now, but that's pretty much a death sentence for any enemy given that there are so many holy murder implements.



Ooh. Nicely done.
Just...just keep quiet. If you keep quiet, maybe I can forget that you're in there.


Obviously, this is the reward for S-ranking the archers. The gladiator drops a sword that we don't have yet, but we'll have another chance to pick that up later in the level. Better to get the bow for now.

P.S. Say hi to the most powerful bow in the game!


Hi, most powerful bow in the game!



Another mana wisp over here if you examine the hole, ripe for the picking. No enemies, no minigames to play, nothing. Even better, the stat boosts are doubled! Rather than giving 10 to HP and 1 to every other stat, it's 20 and 2.

Trying to make up for Mireno, Sting? It's a start.

We also got a Phoenix Wand from the chest.



This block's unsteady. It shakes when I do this.
Well don't do that, then.
But it's fun!
It's covered in cracks. It looks like it could give way at any moment.
Lina! Stop that at once!



Keeps me dancin' all night,
'Til the mornin' light,
And I'm never gonna stop,
As long as you rock the block!
ROCK THE BLOCK
For god's sake! You'll kill us all!



Yeah, let's do it!



wait that's a terrible idea why did i just agree to it


REWARDED FOR STUPID CRAP: Hey hey, look at that! It's been a while, hasn't it?

You'll see what the actual reward is momentarily. Otherwise, I don't think I really need to explain why this qualifies as "stupid crap", do I?



Always jump on this unstable block and narrowly avoid falling to your death. You will regret it if you don't.



Well, I hope you've both learned a valuable lesson from this.
Yes.
Yes.
Good. Don't let it happen again.








...I do like that song, though.
I know, right?





Isn't that the block that just fell?
It sure is. And I know just what we can salvage from it.



Fia? Consider my apology withdrawn. I regret nothing.
Alright. This is, what, our fifth expedition so far? How come you never think to just bring some rocks with you?
Finding them is part of the whole experience! Bringing them with me would be like...I don't know. Buying fish instead of going fishing.
In that it's quicker, simpler, and ultimately more convenient overall?
In that it's for PUSSIES.






When you reach this screen, you have to play a minigame to avoid being blown over by a sudden gust of wind, which will damage you.

Can you guess what's coming up?




Yep, it's another one of these assholes that blows you away if you let them use their Break Out, and this one is the biggest asshole of them all. Why? Because he's completely immune to holy damage. No Disaresta. I also don't have a Power Wrist, which hurts my performance a bit.



Aside from that, though, the strategy is basically the same as it was last time. Just whittle him down carefully, try not to go overboard with multi-hit attacks, and then nail him with an Over Skill once he's down to about half HP. Serene's is probably the best choice, since he's vulnerable to ice damage.





If you examine "Below", you're given the option to drop down rather than moving east. However, all that does is take you to where you would have ended up if you'd been blown away by the wyrm, so it's pointless.



...right?



OH NO. Let me tell you why.

Ultimately, you will end up on the same route, regardless of which path you take. However, the "blown away" route lets you skip over a fair amount of crap, and it'll also plant you right next to a Dragon Eraser and a Mithril Sword, which is very important to have in this level. You'll see why later.

However, if you take the "normal" route, you'll instead come across a chest containing a Wind Bowgun before the paths converge.



This item must be awesome, right? Since it's so easy to miss and we worked so hard to be able to reach it?

If you actually believe that, I'd like to welcome you to the LP, since this is obviously the first update you've looked at. While I appreciate that you've taken the time to check it out, you'd probably enjoy it more if you read it in the correct order.

So yeah. It's shit, and here's why. Firstly, Lina's the only one who can use it properly. Secondly, it can't be mastered, which means no Over Skills or stat boosts. Thirdly, the base damage is lower regular weapons. Now, this is supposed to be made up for by the fact that it's effective against airborne enemies, and that might be nice if it weren't for the fact that every airborne enemy that isn't a total pansy is ALREADY DEAD. Do you know what the last point in the game when the Wind Bowgun might have been useful was? When we were fighting the wyrm that we needed to beat in order to get the Wind Bowgun.

Fourthly, even if you absolutely, positively had to have one, it's not like it's a unique item. All you have to do to get them is suck at fighting archers. By the time you get to the next chapter, they can be farmed infinitely from practice battles.




Meanwhile...



THIS IS AN UNACCEPTABLE LEVEL OF VIOLENCE
Don't worry. I'm sure your friends will be along shortly to censor your corpse.



God, this is taking a lot longer than I thought it would. I'd better be getting some decent overtime out of this.












...what the hell?



Great. I'm moulting.Thought I'd be done with this crap when I got out of puberty.








---NEW ITEMS---
Diana's Bow: Bow-type weapon. Lightning damage.



---NEW OVER SKILLS---

---LEVEL 1---
Glint Arrow
Item: Diana's Bow
Effect: Single attack, power of 415.
Target: Nearest enemy.
Additional: Piercing.

---LEVEL 2---
Frigid Shame
Item: Silvia
Effect: Four-hit Magic combo, power of 182.
Target: Nearest enemy.
Additional: Last attack hits whole row.


---LEVEL 1---
Tragic Edge
Item: Silvia
Effect: Three-hit Magic combo, power of 134.
Target: Front row.
Additional: Not-Vit.

---LEVEL 2---
Radiant Arrow
Item: Diana's Bow
Effect: Four-hit Attack combo, power of 208.
Target: Enemy with lowest HP.
Additional: Extra damage to air enemies.



---LEVEL 1---
Twinkle Tear
Item: Silvia
Effect: Three-hit Magic combo, power of 173.
Target: Enemy with lowest HP.

---LEVEL 3---
Stardust
Item: Diana's Bow
Effect: Eight-hit Attack combo, power of 194.
Target: Random enemies.
Additional: Extra damage to air enemies. Last three attacks hit all enemies.


---LEVEL 2---
Crystia Cannon
Item: Silvia
Effect: Six-hit Magic combo, power of 119.
Target: Front row.
Additional: Last three hits pierce.


---LEVEL 1---
Plasma Shot
Item: Diana's Bow
Effect: Three-hit Magic combo, power of 199.
Target: Random enemies.

---LEVEL 2---
Witch Wish
Item: Witch Broom
Effect: Random number of Magic hits, power of 55.
Target: Enemy with lowest HP.
Additional: Fixed damage.
















My Wind Bowgun rant aside, this update is a little bit short, for which I apologise. There isn't a whole lot to say about Yggdrasil until you get to the meat of the chapter, and said meat must be carefully divided up, because some shit is about to go down here.

This is your appetiser. The next two (or three) updates will be the main course. Be there.




<sub>so who's going to be the first to point out that lorelei has the xguard property and therefore technically the woodlouse shouldn't have been able to block ledah's attack








wait SHIT</sub>