Part 17: Click That Tindeck Link, It's Seiren's Favorite Song

Hey there, everyone, and welcome back! Last time, on Secret of Evermore, a loser with a stick beat up Vigor the Indestructible and got a shiny new sword (we were the loser). We were also tasked by Pompolonius to go find the Diamond Eyes on the west bank of the river (shaddup about treasure), with the promise that the big boss can send us home. We also found out the head honcho has a face that comes out of the wall and likes cleanliness, which is kind of weird, but he might be able to send York and Zach home. And since that's better than anything else we have, may as well see if that's true. With that said, let's boogie.



We've gotta cross the desert again. Well, we could use one of our Amulets of Annihilation to pay off the skeleton and get a ride, but I don't mind crossing the desert. Helps us gain some experience for our new sword, Crush can be pushed toward another level, we can get some experience for ourselves, and we can find that Sting alchemist again.



To prep for our trip, we munch on some chicken feed. It's probably nutritious, since it helps chickens grow. And chickens are mighty tasty, so their food is probably tasty, too.





If you didn't do it before, you can complete some of the market trading here. I prefer doing it before fighting Vigor, since the stuff you get is pretty handy for taking him on. If you're playing along and haven't fought Vigor yet, if you don't get anything else, get the armor upgrades. They're the most handy. The Moxa Stick is also really handy to have for that fight.





Be nice to crazy people; they might try to eat your spleen.





And one more piece of wisdom for the road.





I'll not be showing the entirety of our trip here; just one important thing.



When coming to the desert again, track this guy down again.



And talk to him as Zach.





This is part of why I never bought that collar back in Crustacia.



In fact, if we talk to the right NPCs as the Dog, we'll never have to buy a collar for him.





Eh? Why's the camera panning over here?



Oh, hey, lookit! It's the rock that Tiny threw.







We also find 200 jewels.



Zach is still an engine of destruction, dealing tons of damage.



And Crush is getting more powerful, too.





Frankly, I'd worry more about York on his own. Zach is far tougher than York.



And then Blimp gives us a knife for Zach to hold in his mouth, boosting his attack by a solid 100 points.



...Okay, my wife and I have been playing a lot of Tales of Vesperia lately. I want more dogs like Repede in video games.



In case we somehow run out of Biscuits, we've got a backup to keep Zach going.







So, yeah, Zach can't climb stairs.



Which is where this elevator comes in handy.



This guy is all about the treasure. I can respect that; I like treasure.



See that Rogue up there? There's no way to reach him, beyond cheating. So, I'm not sure what the point of him is.



But you can throw alchemy at him.



Which is how I got Crush to level 4.



Alright, over to the west bank!





Glazius wanted us to have some sort of gadget or weapon to cross over to the other side.



Sorry to disappoint you, bud, but we just need Zach.



He can run and jump across the gap. He's a dog, so he's good for things like that.



There's a couple of enemies over here, but nothing Zach can't handle.





That 77 is a regular attack from Zach. As per usual, he's stronger than York.







We're covering new ground! On the west bank! May as well look for treasure, while we're here.





With our new sword, we're dealing respectable damage.



And I can't help but throw Crush out here and there. It's a fuck-you stone fist. How can I not use that?



Crush is probably going to be our mainstay for the rest of the game; the ingredients will be easy enough to get a hold of, it's fairly powerful, and it's a fuck-off stone fist.



Oh, Jesus, what's that horrid motherfucker!?



HE'S USING HIS POINTIES ON US



...Which looks like it should hurt a lot more than it does. It's like Fist of the North Star, but with knives.



They've got 100 HP, and drop out 70 EXP and 10 jewels a pop.



And you know what they don't like?



Alchemy, pretty much, but Crush feels that much more effective.



Shockingly, we find Water here.



Let's keep scooting along.



That could have gone better.





Oh, we've been saved by old and black Indiana Jones.





Also, be sure to click that Tindeck link up there. It's a very good song. I don't generally remember video game music, but I can recall this tune with ease.



Oh, you've no problem telling anyone else you're from Podunk, but this guy?



Hmm. I just realized that I fit all of that criteria.



...I do own either of those items, though. I mean, I have a bed sheet, so I'm halfway to a toga, but I have not owned a pair of sandals in years.



: Wait! Let me guess! You're from...Podunk!

: Wow! You're right! I'm York and this is my dog, Zach.

: It's a pleasure to meet you. I'm Horace Highwater. I, too, am from Podunk. I figured it would just be a matter of time before another Podunker arrived.



Much like Elizabeth, Horace has created this world.



He was a big ol' history nerd, so he created history nerd paradise.



I wonder if he wore that pith helmet in, or if he had to imagine it in.



Thinking about it, in video game mansions, have experiments ever gone right?



: Fire Eyes, er, Elizabeth told us about it. She's the leader of the prehistoric world on the plateau.

: Yes! Elizabeth, Professor Ruffleberg's granddaughter!



Which means that there's at least one more area to visit, but what's the theme there? We've had Stone Age and Roman Times, so what's next?



Truthfully, locking you in a world made from whatever you imagined doesn't sound that bad.



Then again, Fire Eyes probably thought so, and she had an evil twin running around.



: So, the new leader is after the Diamond Eyes, is he? I thought he would be. They do represent a lot of power, and this fellow is hungry for power. He appeared on the scene only weeks ago and took over Nobilia very quickly indeed. He's very mysterious. None of my contacts has ever even seen his face! I would suspect he has nothing but intentions.

: What should we do?

: Chances are, the leader has other people looking for the diamonds, too. I suggest you find the diamonds first and bring them to me when you have both of them! I'll make sure that they don't fall into the wrong hands! The diamonds are in the Hall of Collosia to the North and the Great Pyramid is to the South. We've dug pits to protect these sites from harmful intruders.



This is another one of those formulas that is only useful for a few different purposes. Like Levitate.





...Was he just waiting over there for his name to be mentioned?



I'm not sure if Horace and York actually discussed his adventures...



: The new leader of Nobilia does not respect the treasures of our world. We have dug pits in front of the Pyramid and Hall in order to keep him and his men away. My Revealer Formula will allow you to see the paths across these pits.



It just occurred to me, if Horace created this part of Evermore, did he create the old treasures and stuff, too? Or did he just have to give the rough draft, and everything else filled itself in? Or did he have the small details and the world filled itself in around his creations?





We don't have a use for Brimstone just yet.



However, we do have a single use for Vinegar, so next update, we'll get to some Stinging. Other than those two new ingredients, he sells stuff we've seen before. It's important to note that Madronius here is one of two ingredient merchants to sell Vinegar in the entire game. And Brimstone. He's great for some rare ingredients, and his prices aren't awful.



Sounds like we should track--



Yeah, that.

One day, these guys will stop cutting me off.



Horace! What'cha got for us?



Much like Fire Eyes, Horace here can be summoned to help us out.



His spells, though, are supportive, and better at keeping your ass alive. Fire Eyes', if you recall, were about fucking shit up.



He has two other abilities we can find, but they're of...Well, occasional use and I don't know if I'd ever use them.



Or Call Beads in general. I keep forgetting that I have them.



I'm not sure if Horace has to pay this lady every time he wants to snooze, or if he's just being a dick and letting her charge us. In either case, after shopping with Madronius, I had 10 entire jewels left to my name, so I couldn't afford to stay.



However, she doesn't charge us anything to save, so we do that.



Before I take off, though, folks, there's something I need your help figuring out.

Northern Halls or Southern Pyramid? I'm not sure where to go first, so why don't you folks BOLD a vote for where you'd like me to visit first? I'll give you until Tuesday, 8:00 PM, EST to cast your vote, and the location with the most votes is where we go first!