Part 10: Attack of the Sand-People!

We've got two choices at the Cannon Travel Agency. We'll be visiting both, but for now let's go with the place we were directed toward. I have a save at this point if anything actually changes based on visitation order.



Before that, however, we're going to another Travel Center. I didn't highlight it before, but there's one in the summer map of the forest.




A quick visit to Gaia's Navel gets us another re-usable tool, the Midge Mallet that some people have mentioned before. In a nice bit of detail, the Elder actually mentions that they used it in the show where they tried to bilk us out of our money.



You can use it to cause or cure the pygmy status condition. This would have been REALLY useful dealing with the Great Viper. There's probably some other uses to explore with it, but one that I've heard is training magic as a pygmy. Your damage is supposedly reduced, but your movements complete more quickly.



Back to the adventure, the Cannon Brother isn't entirely sure about whether or not we can reach the desert. This isn't reassuring.



On the plus side, it looks like there's lots of soft sand to cushion the fall. It's funny when you think about it, though, because you always think of a desert as sandy. It can be rocky as much as anything, though, or even frigid.



Desert Theme: Secret of the Arid Sands

It's definitely portrayed as an inhospitable place, with Boy displaying unusual eloquence for a JRPG protagonist and saying that we need to find a town.




There's a few new monsters to play with. The scorpions aren't much of a problem although they are venomous, but the sand spiders are very annoying to try and hit. No matter whether or not they're sticking out, however, you can nail them with ice magic.



There are also self-destructing pumpkins for... no adequately explained reason. I don't know either, but they're very painful and you're unlikely to get them with weapons before they get you. Fast trigger fingers on the magic are helpful.



About the time these things show up, our heroes are about to give up until they spot a sandship.



The reception isn't exactly friendly...




But the commander appears a good bit more reasonable.



For a given value of reasonable. "Bathe her, and take her to my quarters!"



We're separated from our partners and placed in the engine room, where they spell out exactly what's happened.



Our fellow slaves are a pretty boring lot, except for this guy. I'm wondering where and when he'll show up again or if somebody just said "You know what this game needs? A random out of work pirate."



Evidently there's a Republic that's fighting the Empire. It's very Star Wars, especially since nobody bothers to name the Republic or the Empire.



Regardless of whatever other characteristics the Republic might have, you can tell that the value of nepotism is alive and well. For some reason I can't keep their names straight as they're so similar.




Our awesome pirate friend has a plan to get us out of here, but it's one that only the worst guards in the world would fall for.



Luckily the Republic was in the back of the line when it came to hiring guards. They actually both run off when Sergo shouts fire, leaving the exit completely unguarded. This will be a reoccurring theme.



We've got access to the deck of the sandship now. For some reason I was expecting a lame stealth minigame, but I suppose this game was made a few years too early for that.



"Oh shit, I shouldn't have mentioned that this was the Republic's property. And I probably shouldn't have mentioned it was a sandship. I certainly shouldn't have said it was a secret, either.."

Remember what I said about the worst guards ever?




At any rate, a bit of wandering finds the galley and that Boss is having a great time. Sprites can evidently eat several times their own body weight in food.



The guards actually tell us to take him and just go, for the love of God.



The final stop on this tour is heavily guarded, but we can definitely think of some clever plan to get around them...



Or we could just tell them about how there's no food and see them scurry off to do.. who knows what. Abandon ship and search for food? Try to get the rats to cough it back up?



We appear to have interrupted something. Or not, since Kid's not into it.



Somehow Kid not wanting to give him a handy equals being a spoiled brat. Morie's kind of a jackass.



The actual commander shows up just in time to keep things from getting ugly, and I mean that literally as Kid was probably about 2 seconds from knocking Junior's teeth down his throat.



I don't know how thoroughly the nepotism runs here, but Morie sounds like he's about 12.



It's hard to tell who Meria is more irritated at, but at least he wants us to leave.



After all's been said and done, they finally realize that we look a lot like those prisoners they picked up a few minutes ago.



Before the guards can try anything unfortunate (for them), the Empire does us all the favor of attacking the sandship. Morie's reaction pretty much says it all.



The soldiers with Morie want to surrender, but the ones on the deck have a bit more spine. One word replies to surrender requests are awesome. I'm wondering if this is actually a reference to Anthony McAuliffe's famous line during the Battle of the Bulge.




Our old friend Geshtar is leading the Empire's attack, but he's still not willing to actually throw down himself. Instead, he sicks one of his lackeys on us and skips town.*

*Actually, it turns out that it is supposed to be Geshtar based on later information. No way of really knowing that now, though.

Boss Fight: Mech Rider

Mech Rider Boss Fight Video



I'm not sure what the whole deal is with this enemy, as it looks like some kind of biker on a hover bike.. but counts as an insect/mechanical enemy for damage purposes. This makes our new sword, which is strong against insects, actually very useful.




His main attack is ramming right into you with his bike, but he also likes to increase his evasion with Speed Up and shoot homing missiles at you.



He's technically weak against Thunderbolt, but we don't have enough mana to really blow him up with magic alone. Once you do enough damage he exits by the closest border and drops a whip orb on the way out.



Our performance so impresses Sergo that he offers us pirating jobs should we ever need them.



Evidently the sandship is trashed, but some of the guards are kind enough to give us directions to Kakkara.



Meria suggests that he'd heard about us from Jema, which means that one of Jema's friends was riding around on a sandship picking up slaves in the desert. Charming.



They're not kidding about the whole "Go north." It's literally one screen away.



As you'd expect from a town full of merchant look-alikes, they don't have a shop so much as a guy selling things in front of a building. They've got some serious upgrades here, so it's worth spending the cash.




The town's got several problems, possibly interrelated. In addition to Salamando having been stolen, the Fire Seed is missing as well.



Watts, the omnipresent blacksmith somehow made it here before us. I can only imagine he's pretty miserable with the beard and being covered in layers of leather and chain.



The upgrade to our whip makes it strong against slimes and lizards, another lucky choice for our next area.



The King of Kakkara is just hanging out in the town square being mistaken for a merchant.



Somehow Jema made it out here on his way to Tasnica, after stopping off on the sandship. He really gets around.




Huh. The fire seed and Salamando are missing, and a new tropical city has appeared in the Ice Country. You don't have to be Conan Edogawa to figure this one out.



There's a cannon travel agency right next to the town, and one quick shot later..



We're in Walrusville. Looks cold enough to me, but we'll see what's up here soon enough.

Republic of Pussies