Part 31: Page 31
Hold-on tight, kids - a ridiculously![](emot-words.gif)
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Throughout this whole meeting scene, you can see Roger through the windows (presumably) sliding around the hallways in his socks.
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Some guy : Huh? What was that?
Some guy : Excuse me, Captain, but you didn't raise your hand.
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Amdiral somebody : Now, as I as saying, Ambassador Wankmeister, we are a fairly remote installation and I simply can't spare the ships to launch the kind of operation you suggest.
Beatrice : I'm afraid you don't understand the potential ramications of this problem, Admiral.
Beatrice : If the sludge bandits continue to illegaly dump toxic waste whenever and wherever they choose, the environmental consequences could be staggering.
Beatrice : Entire planets could be devestated!
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Admiral : I think you overstate the issue, Ambassador. Even so, we have more than enough ships on patrol to put a stop to these 'sludge bandits', as you call them.
Quirk : Look, Ambassador. We have top-notch ships staffed with the finest crews in the galaxy. Starcon accepts only the best and brightest for fleet training.
Beatrice : YOU look, rug-head! Illegal dumping is going on in this sector right under your poly-weave. Our patrols have located dumping sites on four planets in the G6 quadrant alone.
Quirk : Hey! This is made from real hair! Er, ahem...
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Quirk : In any case, I'd like to hear more about these alleged dumping sites. Perhaps over dinner this evening?
Beatrice : I have already transmitted the coordinates to Starcon central command, along with the list of suspected sites that we haven't been able to check out yet.
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Admiral : Well then, that settles it. Captain Quirk, you shall go to these sites and investigate Ambassador Wankmeister's allegations.
Beatrice : Admiral, I'll be going along as an observer.
Admiral : I'm afraid that's impossible. Regulations strictly forbid civilian participation in military operations.
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Beatrice : Admiral, may I remind you that I am an OFFICIAL representative of the people of quadrant G-6 with full Ambassadorial status and as such not subject to...
Admiral : ... Now, now, Ambassador. I'm suire Captain Quirk will do everything necessary to resolve the situation. There's no need for you to hinder him on this mission.
Quirk : Uh, Admiral... I think having the Ambassador along would be a good idea. I'm sure the two of us could develop a productive working relationship.
Beatrice : This is MY system and MY people we're talking about here! I'm going on that ship and that's all there is to it! CASE CLOSED! WE'RE ADJOURNED! GOOD DAY GENTLEMEN!
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There was, but then the masking tape fell off
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Totally worth it.
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Smart guy : Yeah, I caught the jerk trying to sneak some answers off my test.
Some guy : Shhh, here he comes.
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And so, having undergone an intesive weekend captain's training seminar on oakhurst, roger is shuttled to his new command - the SCS Eureka.
Wilco : Hey, that's not a starship, it's a garbage scow!
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The first glimpse of your crew. He's either playing a gameboy, or having some type of seizure. Or both.
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Wilco : Hello crew, I'm your new commanding officer, Captain Roger Wilco.
Wilco : I know some of you may not be as excited to be serving on the Eureka as I am, but I promise you this : We are going to be the BEST darn garbage scow in the entire Starcon Confederation!
Droole : Hello sir, I'm subcorporal droole, your nav and weapons officer in this heap.
Flo : Flo's the name. I'm your comm specialist - Grade 4.
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Wilco : We have nothing to fear but fear itself, so hold your heads high men, we shall overcome!
Wilco : All we are is dust in the wind : Born free, running wild, with liberty and justice for all! So let's be all we can be. Remember, it's not just a job: it's an adventure!
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Give me a break, I don't have my sea-legs yet!
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Wilco : It was the chair, really!
Droole : Looks like we got a live one here, Flo.
Flo : You said it, Droole.
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Weeeeeeeeeeee!!!