Part 104: Okabe Rintarou begins to lose hope

I didn't notice any signs at all. Someone is behind me...



A man's voice. Moeka's comrade...?

"That's dirty, Kiryuu Moeka!"

Regrettably, I was still about to pull the trigger.

"Didn't we promise to meet alone?!"

Moeka doesn't answer.



"I'll give you the time machine. Just don't kill anyone."

"Even then..."

Even though I'm still thrusting a gun at her, Moeka ignores it and looks back at me. Expressionless. Cold eyes.

"You'll be confined... and never let loose."

Moeka takes the gun from my hand. She takes it back while I'm unable to resist.

"Please... I apologize for hacking... so please don't kill anyone..."



My consciousness fades.

"Target B secured. Retrieval please."

I knew it was useless. Even if Moeka's group doesn't kill her...



That's surely what the world has decided. That's Steins;Gate's choice.

...What do you mean, Steins;Gate? You retarded? There's no such thing. There's no meaning to those words. It's just my catch phrase.

But...



The will of the world. Natural providence. In other words, an absolute force that humans cannot oppose.



I'm lying down in the rear seat. The windows are all coated with a black film, so with a single glance, I can't tell where we are or what's inside. I feel a throbbing pain in the back of my head. My hands are tied behind me.

What time is it now? How long have I been unconscious?

Aside from me, there's another man inside the car. I recognize him from a previous time leap. He's the one that stabbed Mayuri to death when we tried to escape by taxi. So he was one of Moeka's comrades after all.

The man seems to have noticed I've woken up, but he doesn't call out to me. He just wordlessly shows me his gun. 'As long as I have this, you can't run away.' It's like he said that.

The car's clock says it's past 7. I look out the window again. It seems the car's parked on Kuramae-hashi Dori, meaning we're close to the lab. Has Moeka already attacked? I told all lab mems, including Mayuri, to escape beforehand. She probably won't be killed by Moeka's group.

While that might be true, I don't know if I saved Mayuri or not. At this rate, Moeka's going to take the Time Leap Machine away. What'll happen then? I'm fine as long as Mayuri is saved...



Since I have the Time Leap Machine, I can still do trial and error. I plan to keep time leaping until Mayuri is saved, but if they take away the machine, then the future will be decided. The future without Mayuri.

As long as I can time leap, I can undo everything. Even if I get shot here and now, there's no problem as long as it's not an instant kill.

"Aaaahhhhh--!!"





I got hit by a bullet. The bleeding in my neck and chest won't stop, but neither will the adrenanline. I don't feel that much pain. Since I can move, I guess it's not a fatal wound.

I go to the lab with my hands still tied. I'm afraid I might not be able to input the Time Leap Machine's settings in this condition.



So are Moeka and her fellow men. When I open the door and rush in, everyone looks at me in surprise.

"Okarin!"

Mayuri sees my tattered body, rushing over to me while shedding tears.

Stop... I try to stop that careless action.



I force my way through the trajectory. I cover Mayuri.

But a man pulls me down from behind--



Mayuri's small body collapses before my eyes.
Her widened eyes look to me.
Her eyes, wet with tears, have already lost their light.

This result again...
Again...
Again...!



Suzuha defeats all the Rounder men that appeared, and Kurisu helps me time leap.









I'm in the lab development room when I calm down. It's before 5 o'clock. A little more than two hours until Mayuri dies.

The Time Leap Machine is in front of me. Moeka's goal is to restrain us, and to retrieve this.



If only we never sent a D-mail, then that absurd future would never have happened. Would anything change if I broke it?

I lift up a pipe chair as if levitating it. I'm about to swing it down on this infernal machine...



Kurisu grabs my arm.



"Even if you don't break anything, we won't time leap. Since that's what we decided, it's fine like that, right? Anyway, put the chair down."

I slowly put down the chair. It's not that I'm obeying Kurisu. It's that it's frightening to think what would happen after I break it. This thing is to blame, but on the other hand, it's because of it that I could return here to the time where Mayuri is alive. If I lose this device, I can never start over again. It's that fear that caused me to stop.

"You look pale. What's wrong?"

"..."

"Are you listening?"

"..."

"Ah, wait!"

I rush out of the lab since it's annoying to get involved with Kurisu.





Walking on unsteady feet amongst the crowded Akiba streets, I surely have a dead look on my face.

In the end, I get fed up with the crowd in front of the station, and escape to the pedestrian path. I squat down on the bridge.



That's when I first notice that today's Friday the 13th. Is there no way to overcome this day of nightmares without Mayuri's death?

It's already 5:30. The time of Mayuri's death comes ever closer. The lights around Akihabara Station begin to light up as day turns to night. Even in the new Retro Electric Town Akiba, the station's style hasn't changed. I feel the evil of comfort.

Couples appear here and there. They gaze at the completely uninteresting scenery below without tiring of embracing each other's bodies. The bridge I'm sitting on has become a date spot for couples.

Why am I at a date spot... Mayuri's about to die.