Part 155: Urushibara Ruka has misgivings

In the end, we spent four hours walking. We went all the way to Ueno Park and back, so that was tiring, but I was more mentally tired. We didn't talk much. We just walked.



"Ah, really...?"

She just probably said that out of consideration. Rukako tried hard to say it, but I understood clearly. When I thought about when Rukako fell in love with me, my thoughts kept spinning into a loop, so I couldn't play conversation catch with her. The manual was also quite useless.

In this world line, Rukako was a girl from the beginning, so Rukako's and my memories of when we first met might be inconsistent. Even thinking that, I still can't wipe away how out of place Rukako's words feel.

"So, well... um..."

Rukako fidgets with a small voice.

"Wh-What is it?"

"Well... tomorrow, too..."

"Ah... eh?"



I... I guess so. I mean, we're lovers, and we're going out, and going out means favoring each other, and it's summer break right now, so it's natural to go on a date every day...

"Tomorrow too, I want to be... with Okabe."

"Th-Thanks..."

"Can I..."

"It's not that you can't. Yes. Of course."

"Thank goodness..."

Rukako's soaked in emotion again. Seeing her like this makes incomprehensible feelings well up in me, too...

"Well, see you tomorrow..."

A huge weight is suddenly put on my shoulders. A date tomorrow, too...







When I come back to the lab, I'm greeted by Mayuri's smiling face, and Daru's gaze filled with pure anger.

"Who would've thought that our pretentious hipster Okarin would get a girlfriend? I'm not even jelly..."

"How'd your date with Ruka go?"

"Well, it was sort of... a Stage Clear, I guess."

I felt it wasn't.

"Hey, hey, the day after tomorrow is ComiMa, so do you think Ruka and Okarin could come as a cosplay couple? I kinda want Okarin to persuade Ruka as her boyfriend. No matter how many times Mayushii asks, she never once said OK to cosplay."
"But if lovey-dovey Okarin asks her, then I'm sure she'll say OK!"

"I refuse."

"Ehh? Why?"

Because ComiMa is on the 15th.



Just how would our faces look if we cosplayed at ComiMa on such a day...

"To be honest, I don't understand at all how dates can be fun."

"Geh?! Okarin, you... those words you said make you the enemy of virgin gentlemen the world over! Apologize! Apologize to the virgins!"

"Just think about it. All you do is fuss over your partner, take a boring walk together, eat, and go home. What's fun about that?"

"...Okarin. If you say that, it'll make Ruka sad..."

Mayuri says that with an unusually serious expression.

"Just being with the one she likes is a girl's happiness, you know? That alone is enough, you know? Is it not like that for boys...? That makes Mayushii lonely."

I don't really get how that makes Mayuri lonely, though...

"Okarin's in the minority. Anyway, dates have tons of erotic events."

"You're a real dunce, huh."



"And then at the end of the date, you kiss, right?! Goddammit! You stupid normalfag!"

"You play too many eroge."

"Hey, hey. When did Ruka fall in love with Okarin?"

"When? Well..."









I try remembering again. Something still feels off. Something's strange.

My words: "That doesn't matter."

Didn't I say those words with the assumption that Rukako is a guy?

"...Right, that's right. Weird."

I finally notice what's out of place.



Then I suddenly remember what happened with Faris.







I see. Faris remembered her memories from before she changed the past, before she sent the D-mail, didn't she?

Then does that mean that Rukako remembered the past - before she changed genders?

That would explain everything. But... she has that memory, yet she said she liked me for it, so then... Did Rukako like me even when he was a guy...?

It looks like I need to confirm this.



I head to the shrine to meet with Rukako. Rukako is already in the grounds, waiting. When she sees me, she smiles and waves her hand. Mmm, cruelly cute as always.

"Good morning."

"Ahh, yeah."

"Where are we going... today?"

"More importantly, Rukako."

"Yes?"

I make up my mind and just throw out the question.



Rukako twitches for a moment, and then hangs her head.

"N-No, I don't..."

"Really?"

I try asking, but Rukako stiffly nods. If I put out a firm attitude, I can make her talk... but the contents of the manual burn inside my head.

'Doing things that make the girl sad is absolutely no good! You might get dumped!'

If I get dumped, then what will happen to our 4-day lover agreement? If it's invalidated, then Rukako might not go back to being a guy.

...No, Rukako's not that sort of jerk. Mayuri's life hangs in the balance, so I'm sure that no matter what I say, she'll go back.

That way of thinking is kind of naive, isn't it? But, most importantly...



Rukaki and I

are unable to weave any words.

Mutual distrust? Suspicion? Discomfort? If I say something... If I just say something...

Our temporary relationship feels like it could break at any moment. A suffocating silence surrounds us.

"...I'm sorry."



Rukako bows her head and goes back into the shrine office. I feel guilty that I hurt her. At the same time, I'm relieved at my unpleasant feelings.