Part 181: Shiina Mayuri talks to a dead relative

Of course, the corporate booths and the cosplay grounds are still thriving, but there aren't as many people as there were lined up for admission. I've been calling Mayuri and sending her texts, but she hasn't responded. I asked Daru over the phone too, but he said he hasn't seen her today, either.

Cosplay ends at 4PM. I focused on searching the cosplay grounds during that time, but I couldn't find her. Maybe she finished early and went home. I try calling Mayuri's home phone with that thought in mind, but she apparently hasn't gone home yet. Just where is she...?

It feels like she'll disappear if I take my eyes off her.



That's how I felt, although that may not have been the case. That might have just been what I thought, because we've been thoughtlessly together. Because she's been close for a long time... Because I saw her when she was that weak, I might have just been overprotective of her, but I don't care how other people see us.

Anyway, it's my nature to not leave Mayuri alone.





The final resting place of Mayuri's beloved Granny. How long has it been since I've been here? Ever since Mayuri became my hostage, I've tagged along with her periodically, so I'd come here about once a year, but I haven't come here once since entering high school, so it's been about three or four years.

When I get close to the grave, a voice reaches my ears. It's Mayuri's voice, without a doubt. It sounds like she's talking with someone, but...

I approach without calling out to her, and peek in on her condition from some distance away.



Mayuri is talking to the grave. I'm relieved to find her. I'm glad she didn't disappear.

"Lately, I've been having some scary dreams.

I thought she had finally mastered the ability to talk to ghosts, but it looks more like she's just talking to herself.

"And in those dreams, Mayushii always gets hurt. I get shot with a pistol's bang, or get involved in car accidents, or get run over by a train.

Eh...? Could that mean...

"They seem so real, it's really painful, and really sad. I try to shout 'Someone save me' for dear life, but I can't. Why could I be having those dreams?"



Her memories continue, just like with my Reading Steiner?

"And you know, those dreams always end the same way. Mayushii's crying, and Okarin comes to save me. Mayushii always says 'thank you, thank you,' to Okarin, but Okarin can't hear her voice. Okarin embraces Mayushii, and makes his very sad face, like he's about to cry, but absolutely doesn't cry, you know? But I know he's trying his best to hold himself back."

...In retrospect...



I thought memories couldn't be shared between world lines. I thought my Reading Steiner was special. But maybe that isn't true. Maybe everybody has the same power as me, but to varying degrees. It might even be to the point where it can't be called a power.

"So Mayushii also gets sad, and says 'sorry, sorry', but her voice doesn't reach him after all. And then I always wake up. Why could I be having these dreams...?"





I kept time leaping to try and prevent that, but were Mayuri's memories tormenting her as dreams in other world lines? Without calling out to Mayuri, I stay hidden, biting my lip tightly. Now I've lost my way.

Should I save Mayuri? Should I save Kurisu? There's no convenient option where I can save both. One or the other. If I choose Kurisu, then Mayuri's dreams will become a reality... I don't want to give Mayuri a painful time. Until now, I've only ever thought about saving Mayuri. But even so, it's not like I can just let Kurisu die... I'm lost at another dead end without an answer.

Without noticing me, Mayuri looks up to the sky, just like the time before she became a hostage. She keeps talking to her granny in heaven.

"Ah, that's right, you know, lately our lab mem count has increased! There's Cris, Moeka, Ruka, and Faris. Also, she's moved away, but there's also Suzu. Eight people! Amazing, huh?"

All of them became lab mems in this world line, but there's still one person who has yet to send a D-mail.

"Even though at first, it was just Okarin and Mayushii. When the lab was just formed, Okarin really wasn't that interesting, though. But lately, he looks like he's having lots of fun."

Is that how she saw it... But that's not necessarily wrong. Just as I thought, she really observes me well.

"When I see Okarin like that, Mayushii also gets happy and smiley. Also, it gets busy and exciting. Especially Cris, you see. She got her thesis published in a famous American book. She's really smart. Mayushii admires her. She even made a time machine! Ah, she made it together with Okarin and Daru too, though."

And then Mayuri becomes silent. Her eyes become distant. She looks at the sky, standing still. What could she be thinking?

"But you know, sometimes I think..."



"When the lab was just the two of us. When school ends and I come to the lab, Okarin isn't there. And so, I tidy up the room, and decorate it with small cute things, and finally Okarin comes back a bit late. Mayushii says 'welcome home', and Okarin proudly answers 'good work' without saying 'I'm back'. After that, every day, for about two hours, the two of us would spend our time idly, and then go home together on the train. Those two hours, we mostly don't talk, but it's not an unpleasant silence. Just a feeling that we're next to each other. We sit next to each other on the sofa. Okarin writes some things like the lab's strategy protocol, and Mayushii reads manga, or plays games. I remember every now and then, we'd eat sweets together. Time would flow very slowly and gently, but I still thought that was okay, too. Mayushii would feel like she's really become a hostage, and would laugh 'ehehe...' alone.
When Okarin would see Mayuri smiling, he would say this:"

Mayuri's words touch me. I remember that time too. About four months ago. Back when it was still spring. Instead of the livelihood our lab now has, it had a leisurely time isolated from the outside world.



"Yup. Well, something good didn't happen, but it happened."

"I see, you saw an illusion, huh. Perhaps that was an attack from one Organization leader, known as the Illusion Conductor."

"I see. Well, gotta be careful, then. But I'm sure that Illusion Kidhugger is a--"

"Not Kidhugger. Conductor."

"I'm sure he's not a bad guy"



"That was really pleasant for Mayushii. So happy that I could cry. I wanted to stay like that forever. Ah, but it's not like I hate the livelihood now, okay?"

Mayuri explains to her granny in heaven. Then, Mayuri stops looking to the sky, and hangs her head down instead.



"..."

"So, Mayushii might be getting a little lonely."

The reason we've had less time to talk is because I've been keeping Mayuri's dreams from becoming reality. Frantically evading that result.

Because I want Mayuri to always be smiling.

Because I don't want her to make the same sad face as when her granny died.

"But you know, I don't want to be a burden for Okarin."

Burden... Mayuri used that word again. Even I don't feel that way, one bit.

"Mayuri’s always, always nothing but a nuisance to Okarin... Hey, granny."

Mayuri raises her head again.



"You can."

"Hmm?"

I call out to her when I've had enough, and Mayuri looks back at me blankly. On that face where innocence still remains.
Slowly.
A smile spreads.

"It's Okarin♪ Wow, how did you know I was here?"

"I always know where my hostage is."

"Hostage..."

"So you can't escape my grasp. Ever."

"I see... But you shouldn't overdo it, okay? You know, Mayushii's just a little worried."

"...Hououin Kyouma is not weak enough for you to need to worry."



"...Howha?"

"So until then, act like nothing's changed."

"...Okay."

Mayuri stands up and looks at the grave once more. She gives a brand new white lily and a dango as an offering.

"Okarin. Let's go back."

"Before we go back, we'll eat some dango, okay?"

Coming for worship and eating dango from a nearby stand on the way back was a daily routine back then.

"Ehehe, of course♪"