Part 199: Okabe Rintarou receives two emails

Someone is pulling on my shoulder.

"...Stand up! Uncle!"

My body is being dragged.

At that moment, the knife I was tightly grasping comes out of Kurisu's chest. Even more blood flows out. It still has body warmth.

"Kurisu... open your eyes... wake up..."

"Keep it together, uncle! If we don't leave right now, people will come!"

"I'm sorry... I didn't mean... to kill you... I tried... to save you... Why... did this..."



I have no energy to resist.

While I'm being dragged, feelings of regret and guilt revolve around my head.

I killed... Kurisu... twice...



"Uncle, you can't give up yet. It's okay. Everything will surely be okay. Hold on tight!"



The knife is snatched from my hand. Each stiff finger is forcibly opened, almost torn off.

I couldn't save her after all. Far from saving her... world line convergence... made me... kill Kurisu.

The past has been decided. It was impossible to change from the beginning...



I just crouch there, unable to stand.

"Woah, you're already back! It hasn't even been a minute."

"...Okarin?"



Mayuri rushes over to me. I look at her concerned face. Now, even that concern is annoying.

Please don't talk to me.

Please let me be alone.

"Hey, Okarin, you're all bloody! What happened?!"

"Dad, get a towel and some water, and some clothes! Get them now!"

"Eh? Eh? Please, explain what's going on!"

"Just go already!"

"O-Okay!"

Daru rushes back inside the building.



"It's okay. It's not like he's injured."

Stop.

Don't care about me.

Please leave me alone.

"Save Kurisu?" Please. Far from saving her, I took away her life with my own hands. Here, three weeks ago. I killed her. I murdered her.

"It was useless... anything I do, useless... Ha, haha... Everything has already been decided... The same... as with Mayuri, the same... No matter how much I struggle... the result will be the same..."

Since we have a time machine, shouldn't I time travel once more? No, it's not that simple. Just like what happened with Mayuri, no matter how many times I retry, it will all converge to the result "Kurisu dies". Even if I acted prudently that time and threw away the knife, Kurisu would die for some other reason.

Will Nakabachi kill her?

Will I kill her with something other than the knife?

Will she bang her head on a wall and die of an accident?

The means don't matter. The end will always be the same. Whether I time leap or time travel, I can't change the result by going back to the past. We could possibly change the past by changing the divergence and going to another attractor field, but I don't know how to control that. Changing the past via D-mail is pure luck. There's no way to aim. It's a waste. Even if I try every means at my disposal, it's all meaningless.

"It's useless... It's all useless... Every single thing is useless... I can't save Kurisu after all... Ha... haha, hahahaha... I get it... I expected it would turn out like this... I'm already tired... I want to rest forever... So, that's enough... Haha, ha..."

"Okarin!"



A hot numbness spreads.

"What...are...?"

This is the first time Mayuri has done such a thing. I'm so shocked, I come to my senses.





Her small body gently embraces mine, drenched in Kurisu's blood.

"Okarin... isn't the type to give up halfway... Mayushii knows. You never, ever give up until the very end."



"Okarin would also come every day to see Mayushii... Even on rainy days or snowy days, you would never fail to come beside Mayushii, and keep calling out Mayushii's name... You know, it's because Okarin was always there for Mayushii... that I was finally able to say farewell to granny. So that's why, Okarin, Mayushii doesn't quite understand, but you mustn't give up... I wan't you... to cheer up..."

Mayuri's gentle warmth embraces me, but no matter how much she clings to me, strength still doesn't return to my heart.

"But... I killed her..."



The person who asked me to save her...

"I... killed her..."

"Okarin..."

The knife I stabbed into Kurisu's chest. That cruel sensation still lingers in my hand. I look over Mayuri's shoulder, at my own hand. A hand stained blood red. A hand wet with Kurisu's blood. My fingertips shake, and don't stop.



My heart seems like it will burst from despair. Feelings of guilt crush my chest deep within. If Suzuha hadn't taken the knife away, I might have slit my own throat.

This reality is too harsh... but this is retribution for obtaining and using a godlike ability to control the past. It was wrong to use a cheat code, an ability unavailable to normal people - a godlike ability.

Kurisu can't be saved. That's been proven. At the very least, I can't do it. No matter how much Mayuri encourages me.

"It's useless..."






Right after, Suzuha murmurs this in a voice full of conviction. A familiar mail tone melody goes off close by. From her pocket, Mayuri takes out my cell phone that she's been looking after.

"Okarin, a mail..."

Mayuri gently puts the phone in my hand. I don't have any energy to look at the mail, but for some reason, Suzuha urges me to look at it with a gesture. I reluctantly open up the mail arrival screen.





"Watch TV"...?

Nothing else is written. I've never seen the sender's address. A prank? Spam mail? Bewildered and not knowing who sent it, I casually look at the send time--

I gasp.

The send time:



Eh? No way, then this is...

I don't think something's wrong, or that this is a misrepresentation, because I already know this phenomenon.



I unintentionally look up at Suzuha's face. Suzuha notices and looks at my cell phone.

"Just like I heard...! It really reached...!"

Seeing her open her eyes in surprise, it seems like she doesn't know the details. Suzuha leapt from 2036. There's about an 11 year difference... meaning this D-mail is unrelated to Suzuha?

"What does it mean by 'watch TV'?"

"It says to watch it, doesn’t it? It's trying to tell us something!"

"Heeey, I bought the stuff!"

Right on time, Daru comes back, carrying a convenience store bag.

My phone has 1 SEG capabilities. We can watch TV with that. When we get a signal, what's shown is some foreign airport. Parked there is a jumbo jet. On closer inspection, the plane's tail is burnt black. The subtitle sais "Fire Accident on Russian Airplane".



"Russian Airline flight 801 departed Narita Airport at 11:05 Japan time, but just before arriving at Moscow, a fire broke out in the cargo hold. The flight made an emergency landing in Domodedovo International Airport, and the passengers were evacuated. There were no casualties. On Russian Airline flight 801, where the incident occurred, was a Japanese scientist who had declared emigration to Russisa--"

The screen changes, and the camera cuts to what appears to be inside the airport lobby. There, I see a familiar face, and stop breathing.



"--Doctor Nakabachi, otherwise known as Makise Shouichi, earlier made these comments to the press."

Emigration to Russia? Nakabachi is emigrating to Russia...? I don't think I've ever really heard the word 'emigration' in Japan in this day and age. I mean, you can just go to Russia any time you want without bothering with that mess.

Still unable to stand from the shock of killing Kurisu, I merely gaze at the TV as if watching a dream.

"I'm truly delighted to have been able to safely emigrate here to wonderful Russia. I deeply thank the Russian government for accepting me."

"How was it inside the plane during the accident?" Read the subtitles, in vertical writing on the right side of the screen.

"Inside the plane, it smelled like something was burning, but I was completely calm. Some passengers were panicking, but I stayed quiet throughout."

Nakabachi responds with a face full of confidence. He seems like a completely different man from the one who lost his temper against Kurisu on that day.

"Send my compliments to the pilot for his safe landing. He is a hero, who saved not only me, but the historic thesis written by me."

The subtitles change to "Is that thesis related to your current emigration?" Nakabachi makes an overemphasized nod.

"Indeed. If I were to lose this thesis, it would delay humanity's scientific growth by a hundred years. It's such a serious thesis that it will decide the fate of humanity's future! This is it!"

"What's the thesis's contents?" read the subtitles.



Nakabachi's tone gradually heats up. He starts talking directly to the camera. Moreover, instead of talking about the airplane accident, he's just promoting his research.

And then, what he shows to the camera is that envelope - the document Kurisu put together about time travel.

"In here! Packed in here are the dreams of humanity I have put together! Before long, I plan to announce it to the scientific society. Then, all of humanity will be in fear, and will finally praise my name!"

I'm not worthy to criticize Nakabachi, who abandoned Kurisu's stabbed body and escaped with that envelope. But at the same time, I recall from the back of my mind, the words Kurisu had said that enraged Nakabachi.



Even though he was accused as such, Nakabachi is now claiming his deceased daughter's thesis as his own. "Dead men tell no tales," is it...?

I grind my teeth.

"I originally planned to put this envelope in my checked suitcase. But if I had, the thesis would have burned in the argo hold, and that would be the end of humanity's dreams. However! As if God had declared 'Let Doctor Nakabachi's greatness be known the world over,' fate played a fortunate prank on me."

Nakabachi approaches the camera more and more, presenting the palm of his hand.

"The work of God is this! Because this was inside the envelope, it set off the checked baggage metal detector. I had to take the envelope out of the suitcase and bring it on board! Not too long ago, I called the pilot a hero, but the true hero who protected the dreams of humanity is this small figurine!"

What was placed on his hand was a round lump of metal with a black luster. Its size was no more than five centimeters.

"Aaaaahh!"

Beside me, Mayuri points at the LCD.

What is projected on the screen...

What Nakabachi is holding...

If you take a good look at it, it isn't a mere lump of metal...



"Upa" is the mascot character of the card game "RaiNet Access Battlers", popular not just in Japan, but among children worldwide. There's an Upa cushion placed in our lab. That was something Mayuri received from a regular customer at MayQueen+Nyan². All over Akihabara, you can see them in capsule toys and on cell phone straps. But among all of them, the Metal Upa is the most rare.

What Nakabachi was presenting to the camera on screen was that very same Metal Upa. And, on the butt of that Metal Upa, written with cute characters in gaudy red magic marker, was "Mayushii's!".

"Geh, seriously?! Why does Nakabachi have that?"

"I dropped it in the assembly hall during the presentation. I searched for it, but gave up when I couldn't find it... so this old man had it... I can't go all the way to Russia to get it back..."





I'm getting goosebumps for some reason. My body is shaking. I notice the cause of the goosebumps.

"The Butterfly Effect..."

In Akihabara, Tokyo, in the assembly hall at the presentation we went to three weeks ago, that piddly little character strap Mayuri lost ended up deciding the fate of the Nakabachi Thesis that caused World War III. In the end, it was that Metal Upa that protected the Nakabachi Thesis from the fire. And consequently, the world ends up wrapped in World War III...

"Suzuha, did you... know this?"

Suzuha answers me with an apologetic look.

"That last D-mail from 2025... who sent it?"

What it meant by "Watch TV" was clear from the news regarding Doctor Nakabachi.

"Sorry..."

Suzuha apologizes with a meek face. What does she mean, 'sorry'? What is she sorry for?

"Sorry for not clearly explaining things."



What the hell...

"I've... been tricked...?"

"It's not like I mean to trick you. Apparently, it was necessary for the plan. That's what I was told."

Told... by whom?

"I'm sorry for giving you such a painful memory, uncle Okarin."

"I don't understand. Explain..."

"No need."

Suzuha points to the phone I'm clutching.

"Listen and you'll understand."

"Listen? ...to what?"

"It should already be in that phone."



"...eh?"

"A video mail. Your phone received it, right?"

"Ah...!"

I certainly did receive it. When was that? July 28th. That day. Right after I first met Kurisu. Right when I tried calling Mayuri, I received a mysterious movie mail. The sender was an address I've never seen before. Is she talking about that?

"But there was nothing in it. All there was was noise..."

"If you try now..."

Suzuha's lips twist into a grin.



"You should be able to see it."

...Are you kidding me? Is that even possible?"



Just one saved movie mail. When I check the sender again, it's the same address as that D-mail earlier. Meaning, it's the very same person. So basically... is the owner of that address me in 15 years?

Speaking of 2025, Suzuha told me that's the year I die. Right before dying, I sent this message to myself in 2010... The plan to reach the unknown world line called the Steins Gate.

Could the answer to that... be in this movie mail...?

Mayuri and Daru surround me, watching over my shoulder. I take a deep breath, and press the play button with my wavering fingertip.



Nothing changed after all. There's no message in this movie mail--

"...?!"





Perhaps it was shot in a dimly-lit area, but I can't clearly make out the person's face. Unkempt hair. Wearing a white robe. Are those the only traits?

"Is this guy Okarin in 15 years?"

"It probably is! You know, he kinda feels like Okarin."

Is that so. Is this guy really me...?

On the other side of the phone's small screen is the world of 15 years later. Even if you tell me that, I wouldn't believe it at all. I can't believe I'm looking at my future self, either.



So that last mail was this guy after all...

This guy is me. It doesn't feel real.

"Nice to meet you, me from 15 years ago."

"..."

"Waah, Okarin 15 years from now sounds so dandy!"

"I'm sending this movie mail from 2025. It uses the same principle as D-mails. Upon reaching this β World Line, you dismantled the Microwave Ophone (Temp). Correct? But I... you will, not even in one year, turn back to time travel theory. And you'll stick to it for 14 years. That's where I am now. Along the way, I succeeded at making a device that surpasses the D-mail's limit of 36 bytes.
The fact that you're listening to this movie mail means that you've failed to save Kurisu, doesn't it. Painful, isn't it? I know how you feel. After all, I am you after 15 years. That's right. I also failed. After I failed, 15 years have passed.
You do understand why I made you fail, right?"



"You tried to save Kurisu, and failed. You yourself killed Kurisu. That bitterness. That guilt. They tied you to me, who completed this plan in 2025. Its because of that obsession itself that I'm able to send you this movie mail.
Just as you know, the world converges due to attractor fields. Normally, if you just time traveled, you would be unable to save Kurisu. That's why you had to fail once, to create cause and effect. Preparatory measures. Because you failed, I've been doing nothing but studying for these past 15 years.
Doctor Nakabachi started a worldwide controversy on time travel, and the world ran to war. All the while, I survived underground, continuing my own time travel research. The time machine Suzuha uses was created using my and Daru’s research, but the basic theory was constructed by SERN - "



"The model number is 'Type C204'. The C stands for 'Cristina'. I think you understand what that means.
Anyway, cause and effect has been established. Let's talk about the final stage of the plan. The plan to change Divergence and reach the unknown world line - the Steins Gate. By the way, the one who named it the Steins Gate was me. You of all people should understand why it's the Steins Gate. 'It doesn't really mean anything'. Right?
There are two requirements to reach that Steins Gate. One is to save Makise Kurisu's life. The other is to consign into oblivion the Nakabachi Thesis that Doctor Nakabachi brings to Russia. 'But trying to change that past was pointless' - that's what you should be thinking now. The world will converge. That force didn't let you change the past. Correct?
But without a doubt, there is a way. You can save Kurisu. Listen well.
On that day, July 28th. The first you should've come to Doctor Nakabachi's presentation without knowing anything. You must not undo what that first you saw himself, because that's the decided past, the world line's convergent result. But..."



"You want to say 'What does that mean?' don't you? Calm down. I'll explain now. Who you'll deceive is you yourself. The first you witnessed Kurisu collapsed in a puddle of blood. If you hadn't seen it, then everything you've done until now, and everything I've done until now would become a time paradox. Understand? Upon witnessing Kurisu's death, you sent a D-mail, which was intercepted by Echelon, which tipped off SERN.
Remember what you experienced in the α World Line. All that happened there was Mayuri's death. You met again with the living Kurisu. You forcefully made her a lab mem, and together you made the Time Leap Machine. It was only three weeks, but for you, that was the time you spent with the person named Makise Kurisu.
The you there now. The me here now. Neither of us is the Okabe Rintarou who only lived in this β World Line, where Kurisu died on July 28th. You remember going into the α World Line, living with Kurisu, sacrificing many memories to save Mayuri... But you still kept struggling for those three weeks. That's the sort of being you should be. If you didn't see Kurisu collapsed in a puddle of blood in Radio Kaikan's dim passage, you wouldn't have sent Daru a D-mail, and Echelon wouldn't have intercepted it. You wouldn't have spoken strangely to Kurisu when you met her again afterwards. Kurisu wouldn't have gotten interested in you. And then... you wouldn't be standing there right now, thinking 'I want to save Kurisu even if I have to time travel'. The me in 2025 wouldn't have made the plan to reach the Steins Gate. The me in 2025 wouldn't have sent you this movie mail. Daru wouldn't have perfected the time machine in 2036. Suzuha wouldn't have appeared to you with her time machine.
You mustn't deny those mere three weeks you experienced drifting through world lines. You mustn't undo them. You are right here, having traveled through many world lines with the strong desire to save Kurisu. I am right here, having spent my whole life until 2025 developing the time machine with the desire to save Kurisu. Where you're standing right now is the arrival of the moment we wished for to save Kurisu...!
I, who did not move a single world line, never arrived in that moment. Everything that happens has a meaning. The preparatory measures of my plan are complete. Everything else depends on you."