Part 31: The Microwave Ophone (Temp) is uncooperative

We carry the cardboard box to the development room, half dragging it. Kurisu follows.

"Can you show me the Microwave Ophone?"

"All righty. Want to experiment?"

"You haven't been able to reproduce it after that, right? The phenomenon of sending mail into the past. Did you find out the reason?"

I could do nothing but shake my head.

"Let's test it a little."

Kurisu looks around inside the development room...

"Man. It's full of junk in here."

"It's not junk!"



"Stored here are Future Gadgets Nos. 1-7, with the Microwave Ophone (Temp) numbered as Future Gadget No. 8."

"Future Gadgets, huh..."

Kurisu casually picks up Future Gadget No. 4: Monad Snake off the shelf and stares at it.

"Hey. Isn't this... a weapon?"

"Future Gadget No. 4: Monad Snake, built based off of a claymore land mine, is an instant humidifier."

"How confusing."

"If you insert water and turn the power on, in mere seconds, it spouts a large quantity of water vapor."

"So it's junk."

Kurisu sighs as she returns Monad Snake to the shelf.

"I'm borrowing this."



"Ohh--"

"White coats really put you at ease, huh."

Taken over by deep emotion, I take Kurisu's hand. I grasp it firmly.

"Assistant, you understand, don't you?!"

"U-Understand what? Let go..."

"White coats really are the uniform for research and development, aren't they?!"

I told Daru over and over, but he wouldn't wear one. But Assistant is different. She put it on before I even said anything!

"So I wasn't crazy after all. Cristina, you're the best!"

"You might be trying to praise me, but all I can think is that you're insulting me."

She shakes off my hand. Kurisu turns away.

"I'm giving that white coat as a present to commemorate your entry as a lab mem. Nobody's used it before, so don't worry about it. Hm, or maybe destiny decided long ago for you and that white coat to have a fateful encounter. Daru not wearing one was another inevitability. Everything is Steins--"





Kurisu thrusts both hands into the white coat's pockets, slouching to look at the time machine now placed underneath the table. The previous experiment broke the table and even left a hole in the floor. There's the danger that that will happen again if we successfully cause the discharge phenomenon, so unfortunately, we end up leaving the floor as it is.

"So, you don't tamper with anything on the microwave?"

I point to the X68000 monitor. It's displaying a program.

"It's usually on terminal mode. It can change any settings. It can do absurd things to store-bought microwave ovens."

"How was it set when the discharge phenomenon occurred?"

"Nothing in particular. It was at factory settings."

"Hmm. I'll take a banana."

The bunch of bananas Kurisu picked up only has three bananas left.

"Those are Mayuri's."

"Then I don't need your permission, hmm? I'll go buy new bananas tomorrow."



She puts the Microwave Ophone (Temp) into reverse rotation by remote control. After 120 seconds, the chime rings casually.

"...Nothing happened."

The banana's still in the microwave, non-gelified. Kurisu screams as she tries to take out the banana, quickly drawing back her hand. She starts blowing on her fingers.

"It warmed."

"The microwave functioned normally, huh."

This disproves the "freezing function" easter egg Mayuri found, though we understood that before. Undaunted, Kurisu throws in a new banana, once again starting reverse rotation for 120 seconds, but the second banana gets warmed, too. We couldn't reproduce the gelification and teleportation phenomenon, much less send mail into the past.

"What does this mean..."

"So what happened earlier was an irregularity after all."

"I don't know if it's an irregularity or not, but we ought to investigate the cause."

"I agree."

We agree for once, although Kurisu's and my motives are probably the exact opposite. This assistant wholeheartedly wants to disprove the "Microwave Ophone (Temp) = Time Machine" theory.

"In the previous experiment... after spending 120 seconds in the Microwave Ophone (Temp), the picked banana teleported back to the bunch, gelified. We should consider that it returned to its state 120 seconds ago."

"Wrong. If it returned to its state 120 seconds ago, it wouldn't gelify."

"Karaage returned to its frozen state without gelifying."

"That 'returned to its frozen state without gelifying' logic is also dubious. It was frozen, but did you examine the possibility of gelification itself?"

I... didn't examine that... Mayuri ate the karaage that returned to its frozen state.

"Salt didn't gelify."

"You mean nothing changed."

"After the discharge phenomenon occurred last time, we spent all night experimenting with cabbage, daikon, rice, konjac, melon bread, GaruGari-kun, and cup noodles. The results for all of them were that nothing happened. That also applies to liquids. On that day, the experiment success rate changed 180 degrees before and after the discharge phenomenon. Before the discharge phenomenon, everything succeeded. After, everything failed."

"Did the microwave stockpile on electricity...?"



"Maybe salt's originally simple structure had an effect on that. Electricity might be related somehow..."

"Here, we should think under the assumptions of time travel theory."

"No. It’s not good to think based on theory."

"We've already had several successful experiments. You can't deny that."

"I'm not especially concerned with whether or not this thing is a time machine. To begin with, it's impossible by definition for energy comparable to the big bang to spring forth from this tiny microwave. The discharge phenomenon, and the fractal restructuring. There should be a reason why we can't reproduce either. We haven't changed our methods. We haven't changed the settings. We haven't changed the experimental subjects. Some changing condition other than that..."

"Maybe it's who observes it."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Quantum theory. The observer is an important element to the experiment."

"There were four of us here when the discharge phenomenon occurred, but before that, it occurred when Hashida was alone. For the fractal restructuring experiments, there were either two or three people. Both of us saw both phenomena. That condition shouldn't have changed."

"In that case..."



It's on the tip of my tongue... Then I hear a rumbling sound from Kurisu's stomach.

"Hungry?"

"Sh-Shut up. I haven't eaten anything since lunch."

Kurisu turns away as she looks at her watch.

"It's already 8?"

"Just eat a banana, but only the two we just warmed. Enjoy the materials we used in the experiment. There's also our stock of cup noodles."

"..."

"Don't want any? Well, since you lived in America for so long, I guess you'd come to like fast food more--"

"Cup noodles."

"What?"

"I'll have some cup noodles. What flavors?"

"There's soy sauce and salt flavor."

"Salt."

She seems in the mood to eat.

"Also, do you have a fork?"






At 8 o'clock, the two of us silently ate cup noodles and warmed bananas - Daru said he didn't want any - and ever since then, we've been examining the Microwave Ophone (Temp). I mainly examined the terminal mode settings through the X68000. Almost all of the programs Daru had written were Wizard class, though, so I couldn't understand them.

Kurisus been examining the AC adapter and the lab's switchboard for a while, though we stopped her when she tried to disassemble them. Even though the date changed, Kurisu still didn't go home. Where is she staying in the first place? She came to Japan one or two months ago, and she did say she was going home this month. Though, the trains might not be running at this time. She might not be able to go back. I want to tell her to go home before the last train, but... don't tell me she plans to stay?!

No girls have ever stayed over at the lab. Mayuri has a curfew, so she always goes back home to Ikebukuro. Daru and I frequently stay here, though. It's not an exaggeration to say we live here half the time. Maybe it's natural for American-raised girls to stay over at labs.

"Cristina, is it okay to stay here this late? You should at least call home."

"I don't need to get in contact."

"What? Do your parents operate under lassiez-faire?"

Kurisu turns to me and sighs.



"Wha...!"

Living at a hotel? Well certainly, renting out an apartment for a month long stay is absurd, but--

"You damn celebrity...! If you're American, then you should use a motel instead of a hotel, right?!"

"I'm not American, and there aren't any motels in the heart of Tokyo."

"What sort of hotel?"

"It's a normal hotel in Ochanomizu."

"Ochanomizu? Then you can walk from here to there, can't you?"

"I guess."

I see. That's why she’s so flexible. Now I'm convinced.



"Huh?"

"You said you hadn’t met him for 7 years, right?"

"Why are you interested in my father?"

"You're the one who blabbed about your father aren't you? Isn't that basically a hidden message saying 'please give me some advice about my father'?"

"Like hell it is."

"Excellent, you are my assistant. I can't let my assistant have any worries, so talk to your heart's content!"

Kurisu quickly pouts and says no more. She glares at the switchboard.

"What's wrong?"

"I don't have anything to talk to you about--"

"I see. I get it! Your father was originally a hero, but eventually his body was stained with evil, and now he's an imperial leader wearing a black mask and a black cape, right?! And in the future, you two are destined to fight and--"

I think I heard Kurisu's teeth grind.

"B-By any chance, are you really mad?"

"People's family issues..."

Kurisu doesn't look me in the eye, but her strangled low voice shows how mad she is.



Don't tell me, her father situation is a landmine...? Maybe I should apologize. I try to think of the words when--

"It's heeeeere!"

Daru's war cry echoes.

"Daru, did you do it?!"

"Mission complete."

Daru shows his teeth in a wide grin as he gives a thumbs up.