Part 17: The boring update
This page takes ages to load!The boring update
Why lie about it?

Last time we learned that everything we know is a big lie and that the Shadows are real nice guys. We also learned that President Hayes is pretty racist and a badass.
In equal amounts.
This time we will make our way towards the Shadow cavern - By crossing through another cavern with different Shadows. Wohoo!


This map is very straightforward. Kill everyone -> Get out.

This is actually a good thing. See, NPCs in your group are rubber-banded to Seagull. Which makes them get in your way when you move in tight areas.
They are also terrible for your cars. When Seagull gets in a car, NPCs will come really close to it, making you crash into them a lot. I already said that you can't drive through persons, right? They are rock-solid. The best thing is when they clip into your car, stopping you from moving altogether.

Can I make killing a bunch of guys interesting? Nope! But the game also can't, so bear with me.

In other news, Keno's new rifle is hella loud despite being nearly similar to the PSG-1.
There are a lot of locked containers around, but most of the items are trash at this point.

But G11 ammo is another matter.
When you have moved into the caves a bit, cutscene happens.


It happened. Seagull has gone soft.

Fine! Be that way..

The map itself looks fairly good.

The ceiling is a bit high, even for a cavern. But the Shadow dwellings are neatly designed.
Speaking of which, they have one major camp in the area.


Yep, nothing to see here.
In the other part of the cavern, Seagull finds something of interest.

This is a small armory and you have to find the key for it. It's literally the only reason why you should play this map instead of the other.
So, have a look at what one of the Shadows dropped.

And now guess what weapon was removed from the game?

Back to the killing.

Done with the killing.

We could just leave now, but let's look around a bit.





Grey power!


Attaboy!
Next up is the Armory. You can just pick up the key from a table but you probably won't.

Because it's mislabeled.



Laser ammo and grenades for the auto-launcher? Yes, please! The C4 pack at the top is also interesting. It has been combined with Nails for a greater effect. We can't build this though, probably another cut.

I don't care for the medkits, but the M46 boots are nice.

And that's it! We can be on our way now.
But what kind of LP would this be, if I wouldn't show you the alternate map?a shorter one


Nothing much to see here. So let's get to the matter at a hand.


Just for reference, look at this mighty ravine that we could never ever climb.

Fuck video game logic.
Wanna see what happens if we do try the rickety bridge?



To solve this conundrum, we have to look around in the village.


To fix the ballista, we have to find three items.
A chain, that the blacksmith will fix for us.

Part of a car.

And some wheels.


Here goes..



This is so ridiculous. You can see how close the ground is! They didn't even try some tricks to make the ravine look deeper than it actually is.

If anything, it's unbelievably dumb!
Next time: How fortunate that I brought a Sapper...
Authors Note: Sorry for the delay, but besides being busy I also picked up FTL. But we only have three story updates left, so we'll manage, right? I'll post another, and probably the last, Intermission tomorrow and tell you about the awesome sequel of this game.
Please try to contain your excitement.
