Part 2: Visit Beautiful Tropico!

Update 1: Visit Beautiful Tropico!

It is always morning somewhere on the earth, so good morning, people of the world! This is Juanito once again coming to you with a very special broadcast from TNN: the Tropico News Network! Your votes have been tallied, and let me just say this: WOWIE! The broadcast office has been absolutely flooded with letters sent from all around the world, and there are over three times as many votes as there are citizens on our island! Juanito did not even know there were this many people out there. Why, if this is just the number of you who have decided to respond to our very special broadcast, I would not be surprised if there were over 1000 people in the world! Isn’t that amazing?!

Anyway, the votes and the Adopt-a-Tropican requests have all been counted, although there was an unfortunate incident along the way. You see, a full half of the voting ballots seem to have gone missing, and before we were able to count them! The last time they were seen, they were entrusted to a newly-hired counting assistant. Efforts are being made to track this assistant down, but traces of him seem to have vanished upon his entry into the cemetery. You should not worry, however, people of the world, as the assistant tended to shamble slowly, and likely has not gotten very far.

We have, however, counted up the ballots we were able to find, and found that the Voodoo Pizzaman won with a staggering 61-22! Coming behind him in a distant second is Evita Peron, who received 3 votes, followed by El Pollo Diablo and Che Guevara with 2 each. Most of the other candidates received only 1 each. Of course, since the other half of the ballots probably show a similar number, there is no need to find the rest. Our current dictator tells me that his check has cleared, so Tropico’s new El Presidente is Voodoo Pizzaman!


Our new Great Leader tells me that his hotel company is completely legitimate, which is a good sign, and that he himself used to be a baron at some point. I do not know how he could be a baron, seeing as he comes from Haiti, but this is very exciting!


And now, people of the world, welcome to our little island paradise! As you can see, there are not too many buildings up at this point, but there are long, extensive beaches and no less than three lagoons. While there may not be as much land available as one might find on other islands, our absurd amounts of beachfront property are why our El Presidente was so interested in extending his offer to us.


This is our dock, our lifeline to the outside world. Here the massive cargo ships dock to receive what little exports we can scrape together, and here is where any immigrants who wish to live on our island will be able to land. Sadly, it is far too industrial for tourists, who will refuse to show up at this dock entirely, so a different dock will need to be built when the time comes.

At the bottom of the image, you can see the dock’s information. Like all uneducated working jobs, the dock pays at the rate of five dollars per month, and as this is a considerable income, you can see how all four positions at the dock are currently filled.


Nearby are these filthy shacks! They are built out of little more than scrap wood and steel left behind over the past few hundred years of oppression, and although the rent is free, the living conditions are completely terrible! Still, the construction shop is owned by El Presidente (along with all other important buildings on the island), so it will be up to him as to when or if any decent houses are built.


Speaking of which, this is a view of downtown Tropico. If you look veeeeerrry closely, you can see me waving to the helicopter from one of the windows in the spacious palace in the upper left. Surrounding the palace are various shacks, shanties, and bunkhouses, which are all only slightly better than nothing. The large building across the street from us is the construction office, a most important building, as no new additions can be added without the construction workers to build it! Also across the street is the long building with a tan roof: this is the teamsters’ office. Teamsters are equally as important to our economy as the construction workers, since no resources can be exported without someone to bring it to the docks.

Across the other street to the upper right of the photo is a pair of corn farms. It is not much, but just those two farms can produce far more than our little population needs for food.


And of course, who can forget our very special step pyramid? Supposedly, the Indians who lived here long, long ago had a god who demanded that they should have to walk up far too many steps before he would bother to talk to them. No one has been near it in decades, as we believe it is haunted, but El Presidente has declared that “the loas who infested this site have been cleansed,” so we will now be able to approach it safely. And while it may have been a nice place for the tourists to come and visit, El Presidente has decreed that the contents of the pyramid “belong in a museum.”


The pyramid is now an excavation site, with two full-time positions offered to any miners who wish for the job. However, El Presidente has remarked that we should not expect to see any profits from the sale of artifacts in the near future. He then laughed very deeply and called a nearby Swiss embassy. I think he is trying to arrange for a buyer.


Here is another view of the corn farms. As you can see, there are no requirements of any kind on who can work as a farmer, although other jobs are restricted based on gender and education level. The farm can be converted at any time to another type of crop, although the soil conditions will not be good for every kind of crop in the nearby area.


The first act of our new Presidente was to build a road which connects downtown with the dock. The dock has a garage built-in, which means that dockworkers will be able to come and go more quickly, and teamsters will be able to drive their trucks directly into the building without having to stop and run part of the distance. Roads are very good things, you see.


Next, Presidente decided that a certain amount of capital was needed before we could move on to building up a tourism based economy. While farms require a few years’ investment before they will start producing enough crops to ship, mining deposits (such as the ones shown here) and trees can be harvested immediately. Sadly, the surveyors were unable to find any gold deposits, but there are two bauxite deposits and one iron deposit, two of which have been overlain onto this photograph. After receiving the reports, El Presidente immediately ordered the construction of a mine near the iron deposit in the lower left.


Mines can also be connected to roads, as they are often far away from the regular commerce centers.


Sadly, all of our beaches have made our tree cover much smaller than on other islands, so there were not too many places to put the lumber camp.


Nevertheless, a location was found, and the construction workers quickly began…well, construction.

I have heard from some of the foreigners that it is generally considered a bad idea to build buildings with only an extensive array of scaffolds to hold the frame up, and that using cranes is usually preferred. We have long ago tried out the crane idea, but sadly, the necks were not nearly long enough, and the beaks were able to hold even less weight than our skilled crewmen could handle! So please, stop with the recommendations for cranes.


Instead, we far prefer the technique where every wall and surface is slowly built at once, so that the building seems to fade into existence over time.


And so, here is the completed logging camp. The symbol which was stamped above the camp’s image represents “no personnel,” but do not pay it any attention, as some other Tropicans quickly transferred over to this job after a short period, starting with the newly-renamed Zak 2k12.


Of course, given the scarcity of our trees, El Presidente was forced to build the outbuilding horticulture station, which is built instantly and applies its bonus to the surrounding area. The other building allows the logs to be processed 60% faster, but as it costs much more than the horticulture station, Presidente says it will have to wait.


The newly-built mining camp has a similar set of outbuildings, but as they all require a power source, we cannot build them as of yet. When I asked El Presidente when we could expect to see our first power plant built, he laughed very deeply and walked away. I think he is debating very strongly in his mind as to when a good time to build a power plant would be.


At last, in the middle of August, the usually semi-annual cargo ship arrived.


Sadly, we did not have any exports ready for it at the time, but three new immigrants came onto our island!


When there are plenty of jobs to be had on the island, immigrants will frequently enter the island with their jobs already laid out for them. Ciro Gonzales, for example, has just entered our island and is already a miner! Oh, wait, pardon me.


That is right, our new immigrant Walrus Pete is entering the island.


Here you can see a teamster at work. While he was unfortunately unable to secure a truck for transport, he is more than willing to cart the various resources around on a wheelbarrow.


More lately, El Presidente found himself disgusted with the lack of educational facilities on the island. When one of the young men, bunny of doom by name, was unable to name even five of the powerful loas, Mr. Pizzaman decided that a high school needed to be built, and soon.


Well, no, that is not true. First, El Presidente enacted his very first edict, which was to require a building permit for every building authorized. I am not sure why he did this, since Presidente is the only one who commissions buildings in the first place, but Mr. Pizzaman has told me that this permit will turn into a great profit and margin for use against changes in the global economic situation. Since it sounds so fancy, I have no doubt but that it will prove completely necessary!


Sadly, building the high school also plunged the island deep into debt. The World Bank is willing to lend Tropico up to $10,000 for emergencies such as this one, but the two main backers of the bank, the US and the USSR, are not happy with us when we are owing money to them.


Luckily, this does not prevent them from issuing financial aid every January, as is usual. Though the money given to us by the US helped immensely, it did not quite manage to pull us out of debt.


Meanwhile, another building, a tenement, was also commissioned. As you can see from this photo, El Presidente himself was present during its construction.


Unlike bunkhouses such as this one, tenements can hold up to twelve families, and under better living conditions. They are expensive and time consuming to make, but this expense is usually worth it, or so I am told by our neighboring islands.


It was about now that our Great Leader started to shout angrily across the street at the construction yard. “Get back to work, you lazy good-for-nothing fu—er—punks!” he would constantly shout. I am glad this studio is mostly soundproof thanks to a generous supply of plastic bags, or else my daily broadcast would have many such interjections to be heard.

I do not know what he is trying to accomplish, however. It is probably very hard to continue working in construction when you are bound to suffer chronic headaches and stomach pains.


Ah, yes, the second cargo ship held much more excitement! There were more than enough stored resources to pay off the national debt, and even more immigrants came onto our little island! There seems to be no end to the number of jobs available here right now, so they are always glad to come.


What is more, our very first high school was finally finished! Some of the construction crew commemorated the event by pre-spraying some graffiti on the walls.

Unfortunately, to use the high school properly, we need someone already high school educated to teach the classes. While a foreign expert could be sent for, this could end up being expensive to handle, plus the Nationalists do not like it when foreigners are intentionally brought in to take Tropican jobs.


Instead, the Big Book of residents was consulted, and it was found that there was, in fact, a high school educated woman already living on the island! She was currently working on a farm, but El Presidente told us he could entice her into the school.


Unfortunately, the fake pizza box did not fool Vanan. After El Presidente got his wind back and his voice returned to normal, he decided to try a different approach.


Mr. Pizzaman fired Vanan from her job at the farm. The hope was that, as she was freed from her current obligations, she would be more willing to take the higher-paying teacher position.


Although she remained a farmer long enough to hear El Presidente’s speech (more on that later on), she switched to the teaching profession immediately afterwards.


As each teacher can only teach two students at a time, the process of educating Tropico is expected to take some time for now. Hopefully it will speed up after more women are able to graduate from high school themselves, but as of yet, not enough time has passed for much education to occur.

However, this does bring me to the promised vote! You see, with both a mining and a woodcutting industry in place, we can now afford to branch out into other basic industries, such as farms. El Presidente wants to know what you, the people of the world, think he should do to expand the Tropican economy.


Our island is a very good habitat for pineapples. Not only can we Tropicans use the fruit to expand our diet, but it can be canned in a factory and sent off to foreign nations as fancy, expensive preserved fruits!


Coffee does not grow on our island quite as well, but there is a highland at one edge of the island which would be very good territory for such a farm. Coffee cannot be eaten, sadly, but it can be canned at the same plant as the pineapples.


Tobacco suffers even worse in our climate, but it is one of the most profitable crops we can plant, especially if we build a cigar factory. El Presidente has expressed a very particular interest in trying to grow these plants anyway.


On the other hand, sugar grows very well on our island! Sugar is also a good crop to have, as it can be distilled into very expensive, very fancy Caribbean rum, or the even more expensive and fancy spiced Caribbean rum.


Of course, we can also forget the whole thing and go straight to building a tourist dock to start bringing in those fat foreigners with the fat foreign checks.

And now, it is time for our special segments.



Today on Adopt a Tropican Corner, we will be following a very special Tropican indeed: El Presidente himself!


Here he is, standing outside his palace’s front door. While all the other Tropicans go about their business without interference, El Presidente is always fully in control of himself. As his needs are always perfectly sated by his living style, he is free to wander about the island, visiting various locations as he feels the need.


For instance, visiting an industry building such as a farm or a factory increases its production ability for several months after his visit, and services such as clinics and churches increase in their service quality for the same period. We Tropicans are always so happy to see him! Or we’re afraid he will come back. I forget which.


But you can always tell when El Presidente has been by, as it always seems a little sunnier after he leaves.


While the infrastructure buildings such as the construction yard and teamster hall do not seem to care about El Presidente’s visits (I believe all the yelling and screaming that goes on when he shows up may have something to do with this), El Presidente can visit construction sites, and as long as he is there to direct the workers, the buildings go up much faster than normal.


Sometimes, El Presidente feels the need to make a speech from the balcony of his palace. While the people of Tropico always love to hear a good speech, and their respect for him goes up for a while afterwards, Mr. Pizzaman should not do this very often, since everyone in the area will stop working in order to listen to him, and his speeches can take a long time before they are through.



And now, our second segment: Meet a Faction! Today’s faction: the Communists!


The Communists are a faction which you can usually count on as being big, or at least bigger than the other factions. It is often the lower classes which are its strongest supporters, although as everyone is lower class at the moment, it is hard to tell the difference. Even so, with 16 supporters on an island of 55, it is still one of the strongest factions in Tropico.


As such, El Presidente may want to feel worried about their lack of support for him. In the end, the Communists only want the basic things in life: food, housing, health care, and for the rich to not be much richer than the poor. However, the wealthy Communists do not seem to feel quite as strongly about that last one, so it is not as important. What is important, however, is that the USSR gets a lot of its opinion regarding Tropico based on how our Communists feel about El Presidente. And while our Communists may not have very much beyond their lives and a few stashed-away AK’s (and, honestly, everyone has a few of those), the Russians have many, many battleships, stocked with many, many soldiers. As such, the respect of both Communists and Capitalists is a hard-won but worthy goal.

So, what do you think, people of the world? Should we build farms for pineapples, coffee, tobacco, sugar, or build a tourist dock instead? You may also choose to write in an alternate action of your own, assuming you believe that you can run our island better than El Presidente. Until our next special broadcast, this has been Juanito!