Part 6: And Freedom for All
Update 5: And Freedom for All
Greetings once again, people of the world! Juanito must apologize for the bomb scare last February. Thanks to the quick responses from the world, the bomb was found and dismantled, and the cigar factory is back up to regular production. One of the inspectors was kind enough to give El Presidente his monthly case of cigars during the downtime, so no one had to experience hard times!
The world is not in such a good state, from what I hear. Two of the kind fellows who were willing to take over Tropico, Fidel Castro and Che Guevara, have instead gone to Cuba, which they have taken over instead. The government of Iraq which was set up by the British has been overthrown, and some fellows calling themselves the “Viet Cong” are terrorizing the South Vietnamese people. No one has attempted to attack Mr. Pizzaman, but revolutions seem to be in style at the moment all across Latin America.
Unfortunately, in spite of the constant support of El Presidente and Juanito, it seems that the cabarets are not getting many non-tourists to come by! Because of this, El Presidente has decided to build a restaurant closer to the downtown region. The girls are not quite as exciting as in the cabaret, but Juanito must admit that he enjoys dining out almost as much as dancing girls.
Since the cigar factory is not expected to have very much input, El Presidente has decided to only allow four workers to have jobs there. This was before the bomb incident, of course.
Also, following up on El Presidente’s campaign promise, he has commissioned a church to be built. The cathedral is certainly all well and good, but having only one cardinal means that only so many people can go in and pray at once. The people cannot be trusted to not take things at random, after all! As the church only requires high school education, it filled up with priests much faster than the cathedral has with cardinals.
In the June of ’58, the global economy stabilized once again. Juanito did not think you had it in you, but thanks you all the same.
It was especially nice how you timed it to just before the cargo ship arrived.
With both the church and the restaurant finally finished, perhaps people will stop complaining quite so much. Oh! That brings me to the next announcement.
Toussaint Louverture has long been a citizen of Tropico, but recently she began acting strangely. She declared herself a “trans-sexual”—
¿“Transexual”? ¿Cómo “trans” los relaciones sexuales?
¡Yo qué sé!
She also started to make very strong demands for things like “gay marriage” and “sensitivity training.” She even wants to see a newspaper set up immediately!
Yo pensaba que todos eran felices bodas.
A mí también.
Ms. Louverture ended by making some reference to disappearing chickens. While this has been a problem, Juanito did not think it was important enough to bring up.
However, when brought to El Presidente’s attention, he determined that a simple solution was best.
In unrelated news, one resident of the island, known only as “The All Saint,” has been accused of aiding and abetting the rebels of Tropico.
Sadly, she resisted arrest, and had to be shot before she could warn her confederates.
Just after the bomb threat at the factory was dealt with, work was finished on an immigration office.
This will help very much in the future by regulating who we let in and out. The office can encourage immigration, encourage emigration, prevent immigration, prevent emigration, or favor those with high school and college educations with immigrant visas.
Many people seemed to want a college to be built on our island, even though this was not the question provided by El Presidente. Although Mr. Pizzaman considered using simple solutions for all those who asked, his advisor, Penultimo, convinced him that doing so would not be so simple after all. So in the end, El Presidente chose the simplest solution of all: ignoring the requests entirely! Setting the immigration office to seek skilled foreign workers will certainly be sufficient for now, I think.
However, no one seemed to want to work at the office, so El Presidente had to encourage two of the teachers to give up their former jobs. And since there were so few students, he also decreed that no one should replace them.
After this, of course, the two former teachers were perfectly willing to embrace their new positions.
It was not long after this that the first Tropican rum distillery opened, providing many jobs for all kinds of high school graduates. El Presidente would rather that anyone could join the factory workforce, but after Penultimo explained to him that workers without hands do not get much work done, he relented.
Also, after the bomb threat shut down the cigar factory for three months, Mr. Pizzaman became convinced of Tropico’s need for a police force. Four soldiers can only oppress so much, after all.
In fact, El Presidente has determined that we need even more police than what one building can provide, and has decided to spend 1960’s financial aid money on “extra” police.
However, he does not want to wait for the builders to get around to building a location for the extra police to stay, so he wishes for the people of the world to determine where to put them! I will list the options at the end of this broadcast, but for now, here are the special segments!
Today’s subject is one of our elders here on Tropico: Media Direct Canon!
Ms. Canon is 68, and not very good at moving quickly. It is believed that she has been walking along the beach between the dock and downtown since before the garage in the background was set up.
For just as long, however, people have been coming to her in search of leadership. Much as the Nationalists refuse all outside help, however, she has decided to make the journey on her own and without any assistance.
When we caught up to her later in ’58, she had made it onto the grassy area beyond the beach. She was quoted as saying how much more comfortable the sun was in the trees’ shade.
Several months later, she had made it to the edge of the town.
By the time 59’ rolled around, her destination was in sight.
Go nana, go!
At last, in September of ’59, she made it to the parking garage and retrieved a car so she could finally make it to the doctor’s office.
She was still quite capable of holding up traffic, however.
Today, we look at the faction dearest to Media Direct Canon: the Nationalists!
The nationalist do not have much power in a nation full of immigrants, but they are held in high respect by those of us who were born on this island.
The Nationalists are one of the hardest factions to please, though they are easy to understand. The Nationalists believe that Tropico is the greatest nation God has ever given the Earth, and they resent it when El Presidente acts like this is not so. If El Presidente has to call in an aid corps, if he allies with either superpower, if he encourages immigration too much or even calls for too many foreign workers to fill local jobs, the Nationalist become upset. In fact, they would love it if El Presidente closed Tropico to immigrants entirely, and they want higher wages so they can boast to all their Caribbean friends.
Now, at last, I shall tell you the options for El Presidente’s extra police. The buildings which are available to be taken over are the police station (though this seems rather redundant), the immigration office, the church, the restaurant, and the two cabarets. Sadly, the building will be unavailable for its regular functions, so all except the cabaret will need to be rebuilt if that is the people of the world’s decision.