Part 63: Governor Boris And The Distressing Fact Playing Melee In This Game Fucking SucksGovernor Boris And The Distressing Fact Playing Melee In This Game Fucking Sucks
Last time on Tyranny, Antio and Bitter Quip made us do all the work again.
Blah blah blah river blah blah blah penis.
The sages have some pretty vicious spells we're too broke to grab right now.
We intimidate one of the men into fleeing because I sure as hell don't want more Tyranny combat.
People aren't happy to see us.
I don't think I grabbed this last time I was here. It's in the upper right hand corner of the map.
Sybil gives a speech about how the guard won't abandon the village, blah blah blah.
This never gets old.
Remember when I said we were going to be more cruel this run?
: This village is an accessory to sedition. Surrender or perish.
The village is harboring stolen iron and you literally lured us to it.
: They knew the cost of defying Kyros.
So...when we were a mage with a ton of AoE disabling blast spells, this fight was a breeze. Now? Now it sucks!
That Sage has a decent lineup of control spells. Now, we don't really have a lot of spell slots - I've got three attack spells on Lantry, so we're just getting the melee guys confused and frightened. Boris is running a new talent I forgot to screencap - it's a battle stance that AoE taunts enemies every six seconds, making him the only tank in the game worth a damn. Of course, this means Sybil and the entire front line is wailing on Boris, so, uh....
Yea. We can't really do much about this!
I do discover that enemies have a fixed threat range and they will auto-retreat to their spawn point, so I try to run Barik off in the hopes of ending combat and getting everyone back up like you can sometimes do in Pillars of Eternity. It doesn't work.
After five tries I finally figure out some way to win this fight. I think it involved Boris in heavy armor and microing Lantry to actually cast his damn spells. The AI in this game is really bad and for some reason the devs think Lantry should be autoattacking with his quills. No.
: Well done, Fatebinder! If this one survives its wounds, we even have a fresh present of the Archon of Secrets - he did request a personal audience with any leader we can take alive.
God damn Antio is a worthless dumbass.
: I say give her to the Scarlet Chorus, see if she survives the trip back to camp.
: So if she lives, this fanatic will be trusted with a weapon. Lovely.
: And what of this village? The locals could have trapped the houses, so too risky to commandeer the site. He shrugs, his tone becoming matter of fact. We should burn the town. It'll cut off support, send a message, and the smoke signal will give the others a visible rallying point when crossing the Matani.
As the villagers are all still here, the choice to burn the down isn't just burning buildings but burning people alive in their homes.
We took the slavery choice last time.
: Burn the town with everyone in it. Let us send a message the rebels won't soon forget.
That message is "Kyros is fucking insane and you need to resist at all costs."
Funny how Verse, despite supposedly being a psychopath, is subtly encouraging mercy here. Sure, it's forced conscription, but it's a damn sight better than being burned alive in your home.
: Very well. Whoever remains in Echocall will be a slave or conscript to the Scarlet Chorus.
As much as I hate to say it, Barik's not entirely wrong. The standard practice for violating a surrender oath and launching an insurrection against the Roman Empire (for example) was exactly the kind of shit Verse just talked us out of. Of course, this will do nothing to actually quell the rebellion and will just piss everyone off by turning a crappy reactionary faction into pop heroes.
: That would only prove our point - these are competent fighters who are better put to work in Kyros' army. No boss who falls to a simple villager deserves to live anyway.
: Kyros' Edict looms overhead - have we nothing better to do with our time? The Disfavored warrior shakes his head in a huff, and turns to his squad. Hear that? The Chorus just made this town their headache. Now start rounding up your gear, there's lots to do before we rest.
: A sensible decision, dear Fatebinder. If we hold to the Disfavored' pogrom of razed soil, what will remain for us to rule?
: Bitter Quip claps his hands, raising his voice to address his gangs. Seize this place! Search the homes, take all that you can carry! Give each survivor a chance at the Voices' mercy, but to the ungrateful, be brutal!
TheGreatEvilKing summary posted:
: Could you take mercy on the villagers? They're not warriors?
: No, but they're traitors. Maybe don't break your oath and rebel against Kyros?
: Ah, you're playing melee... have fun, fucker!
: Ooooh, a prisoner with valuable intelligence!
: You should kill her, because I am dumb.
: She's all yours, Quip.
: I want a thing! Burn the village. Burn it! Fire! Fire! Heh-heh-heh!
: What? No, we should loot it and enslave the inhabitants instead.
: These fuckers made me reload five times, burn them all!
: Hey, boss, maybe we could get more use out of them as conscripts? We need armies to take the citadel.
: Sure, why not, do that.
: I'm taking my ball and going home.
We find the missing iron and threaten to tell the Disfavored.
Blah blah blah ambush blah blah blah recruitment.
Return the iron because I need the cash for sigils.
I buy and have Lantry learn the Sigil of Guarded Form, as Boris is too dumb.
Dodge the Vendrien Guard/Brotherhood combined encounter, because holy shit are we going to be slaughtered as a melee PC.
We punch Death Knell for not warning us of an ambush. Boris is a mean man. It's kind of weird that we get wrath for punching Death Knell, but favor for shoving the gate guard around. My guess is that we're supposed to fight her instead of hiding behind Fatebinder status? Who knows.
It's time to chat with Sirin.
Um, kid, what the fuck?
: Do I look like I can hurt him? She returns her gaze to you and leans forward as if to share a secret.
: These... good people aren't for my protection. Apparently I'm dangerous. But I guess you already knew that. Can't have me collecting followers again like I did in Lethian's Crossing, can we?
: If some people started worshiping me. Is that really such a bad thing? Is Kyros really so insecure to worry about a little competition?
Yes, yes, and yes.
: Look at me! Do you think I seem dangerous? What harm can a fifteen-year-old girl cause? I'm only a child. The smile falters. She looks down, her hand moving to the headdress, her thumb tracing the edge of it along her jawline. She looks back up, the hard look back in her eyes. She regards you for a moment before continuing.
: So, Tunon's Fatebinder in the middle of a battlefield... Kyros must be desperate. You were sent to shame Ashe and Nerat into action, weren't you?
: Ashe certainly needs someone to dig a heel into his back, if only to distract him from his problem. She purses her lips in thought.
: Oh, I'm sorry - is it my turn to talk now? I thought this was 'listen to Sirin blather' time.
Wow, we sucker punched a woman and now we're being a dick to an abused teenager. Good job, Boris.
Yes, I clicked the buttons. Shhh.
I'm not sure how actually manipulative Sirin is being and how much of this really is a desperate cry for help. I know one of the devs said Sirin was his favorite character to write because of how screwed up she is, but Sirin is literally a friendless child kept enslaved and under constant armed guard trying to find someone who won't treat her like shit.
: Things never change, do they? The faces are different but the words keep repeated. 'The girl has such power!' 'Use her voice - it can bring down realms!' 'Such might in one so young!'
: No one gives a claw about me! I don't know wh you would be any different. Everyone wants the same thing - my help. My power. My voice!
Not animated: a wave of power from Sirin knocking people down.
: [Leave.] I must go.
Well now, that's just rude.
: From the corner of your eye, you see Verse cup her hands to her ears, turning her head away from Sirin.
: Sirin's mouth opens in a perfect O-shape, and the sound that pours out is captivating, entrancing. It dampens the ambient bustle of the camp, until it seems that nothing exists but her voice.
: [Lore 40] What are you trying to do to me?
: You will answer some questions for me first.
: Oh her? We go way back.
At least Lantry thinks we're cool. What if we pester Sirin again?
Sirin accurately identifies the dumbest member of the party.
: [Athletics 34] Restrain Barik.
: Thank you. I don't know what came over me.
: Archon, with all due respect, we will keep our distance from each other. I would not engage with you again - accompanied or no.
Jesus Sirin. If we talk to her again, she just tells us "You are not welcome here".
TheGreatEvilKing summary posted:
: Oh, look, it's the Fatebinder. Are you here to punish me, or do you just need my power? Huh?
: Remember me? You took my cult and sent them to die. Was Kyros jealous? Huh? Let me tell you a secret - these guards are to keep me in line. I'm only 15! I'm not a threat to anyone! I'm guessing you're here for Ashe and Nerat?
: Holy shit, I can talk now, after all those words? What are you, a Numenera character?
: That was mean and low, Fatebinder! I'm crying now! How could you compare me to one of those trolley loving freaks? NO ONE CARES ABOUT ME! They just want to use me for my power!
: Um, I'm gonna leave like an asshole before you and Death Knell form the "women who hate Boris" club.
: No, you're not going to do that, because I have mind control powers. Now, remove my helmet.
: Nope. Now, as penance, I demand exposition.
: Fuck off.
: You know the Archon? Sweeeet!
: Actually, Barik, you look like a dumbass, you remove it.
: Nope, Barik, I'm grabbing you so you can't do that.
: Thank you, Fatebinder. Now, Archon, with all due respect, I'm getting a restraining order.
: Lol good luck bitch.
A lot of people in the thread pointed out you can actually help out poor Vittles here.
: You there - what's your name, lad?
: New to the Chorus? Captain is a southern term. Kyros' armies have Commanders. And I'm neither.
: And just why is this a mistake? Did someone take the vow for you?
: Never served in the watch... how old are you?
: That makes you too young to be in the Chorus. Summon your gang leader, and I'll solve this.
Oooh, sassing the Fatebinder...not a good move.
: This boy - he of a proper fighting age?
: You are aware that under Nerat's own law - Honor and Guard the Young - this boy is exempt from the battlefield.
This really clashes with Sirin being legally a child, but you know what, I am totally ok with keeping fifteen year olds as children in a fantasy videogame.
: [Lore 34] Southern tradition requires all non-seafaring men to take arms for their village watch upon 15th year of their name. This boy had not yet served his watch, which means he's not of age.
Boris is about to ruin this man's whole career.
: [Lore 34] Aren't you forgetting something? Children are a valued and protected commodity in the Chorus. As he's a member of your gang, you'll need to properly serve and protect him until he comes of age.
I see this young man is a Fatebinder in the making.
: Hit him all you want, kid. But be careful - in the Chorus, the minute you murder someone, you come of age.
TheGreatEvilKing summary posted:
: Hey, important looking dude, can you help me out? I'm not supposed to be here! I'm just a kid, dude!
: Oh, yeah, that's super illegal. Let me speak to your gang leader.
: Hey you dumb fucking Fatebinder I was getting high and gambling what's this bullshit?
: You know this kid's not 15, right? That means he can't fight under Nerat's laws.
: Cool, he's a slave now.
: Actually that makes you his bitch.
: Remember how you used to hit me all the time, asshole? Ha ha sweet I can hit him and he can't hit me back! This fucking rules!
There's a Lore trainer in the Chorus camp, so we raise Lore on Boris and Lantry before wandering off into the wilderness.
I love that even Tunon knows these two Archons are complete fuckups.
Fake Limp here gives us the assignment to go capture Florian while he fucks around.
We just murder his ass. It procs a trap where some Vendrien Guard guys hit us from behind.
It doesn't save them. In my defense, for some reason I thought you had to have saved the brother for Florian to surrender.
That's great, I don't take orders from Fifth Eye.
: I tried my best, but he didn't seem to like the Chorus much.
: Then you should have argued harder! Or knocked him over the head and carried him against his will? Fatebinder, is this really your first abduction?
: Not sure I like the tone of your voice.
: Not sure I like the tone of your face!
TheGreatEvilKing summary posted:
: You killed Florian? BAWWWWW!
We go round up the Earthshakers and accuse them of treason, then go back to the Disfavored war camp. I turn in that quest offscreen, and show off one adjudication I didn't show off last playthrough.
: Something wrong?
One of the Disfavored soldiers turns to you, looking weary from debate. This one here stole from the legion and thinks he can get away with it. She points to the Chorus warrior clutching the helmet. If he takes one more step, we'll be forced to violate Kyros' Peace.
Wrong thing to say!
: Fatebinder! Can you hear me out? I'm being accosted by these Disfavored thugs!
: Upon noticing Verse, he blinks and regards her with a respectful nod.
: Someone mentioned Kyros' Peace being violated. This involves me whether you like it or not.
: We can make this a trial of who stands here the longest! And when our bladders loosen, at least I won't be the one wearing an iron diaper. But I'd much rather let the Fatebinder settle it... seeing as there's no other way out of this impasse.
: May I see that helmet?
: [Inspect the helmet.]
: Battered and corroded, the helmet has chipping along the left parietal and rust blossoming all about. It's likely been separated from anyone who knows the first thing about maintaining iron equipment for many weeks.
: [Conquest] The owner's insignia is lost, but this was forged by Agni, Master of Fitting. It belonged to an Evocatus - someone of many years in the legion.
: [Leave] My work here is done.
TheGreatEvilKing summary posted:
: It's my helmet, I found it!
: Give us the helmet or we're gonna break Kyros' Peace.
: I'm sorry, did someone say "break Kyros' Peace?"
: May I see the helmet? Oh, yes, this is a masterwork forged by the Forge-Bound Master of Fitting.
: Shit, really? Here's some money, pirate guy, now fuck off!
NOW we can deal with the Archons.
: Oh you're so young, we can forgive you for being stupid. Without your Archon of Stone to bring down those walls, you're out of your element. Only the Chorus has the numbers required to storm the walls from all sides - WE will lead the vanguard of this battle!
: The best the Chorus could accomplish would be leaving a ramp-shaped pile of corpses propped against the walls for my warriors to use. Their fortifications are not a concern. Even under-staffed, my Earthshakers could breach the masonry in short order.
: I trust them more than I'd trust your circus of rapists, sellswords, and turncoat Tiersmen!
: Archon Ashe turns his head and, upon seeing you in the tent, relaxes his posture.
: Our operations in Echocall Crossing and Tripnettle Wilderness were successful, why aren't you two marching toward Ascension Hall?
I dunno dude, maybe because you're a god damn moron who marched his troops into first a fuckoff Edict we personally warned everyone to stay away from, and then into an obvious trap river?
: Now that we're all assembled, I want reports. The Scarlet Chorus was going to resolve the oathbreaker presence in the outer valley. What became of that?
: Yes... what DID become of that? We should know already, yet we do not. If we are not mistaken, the Fatebinder played a pivotal role in this operation. Fifth Eye, shed light on this baffling question.
Look, man, you were just gonna stick a spike up his ass and turn him into an ineffectual boss fight summon.
: They are oathbreakers, they've abused our mercy once before and we're idiots to think that'll change.
Look, Nerat, it's not our fault you didn't commit sufficient forces to capture Florian.
: Securing the Matani was a gruesome affair. An agent of the School of Tides still lives, and the river was turned against us. Despite our losses, the day ended in success at Echocall Crossing, though victory came at great cost.
Specifically, the Fatebinder did most of the work with an assist from a few Scarlet Furies.
We're just not making friends today.
: Their leader, Captain Matani Sybil, was bested in combat but taken captive by the Scarlet Chorus. Despite the Disfavored taking the lead on this operation, the Fatebinder felt it necessary to apply Chorus doctrine to the captives.
If by "taking the lead" you mean "drowning because the local commander was too inept to recognize a feigned retreat", I suppose that is an accurate statement.
Nerat's writing the reddit post as we speak.
: Odd, you think the Tiersmen so pathetic and harmless, yet you seem pathologically afraid of what they might teach the Chorus.
Remember when Eb said that the Disfavored had a prisoner swapping agreement?
That's not a denial!
Nerat's as quick as Boris.
Of course, he's been playing Ashe like a fiddle this entire time.
: A truce with the oathbreakers? Is this true?
: Enough bickering. We are running out of time to take Ascension Hall.
Ashe is desperately trying to change the subject right now, because Nerat is going to pounce all over him.
: You will do as WE order, you are not to take orders from this addled ponce.
The only thing that could maybe salvage this situation right now is Tunon showing up in person, and he's not going to work against Kyros' magic to get into the valley.
: Then the impasse is clear. We both wish for the honor of leading this final assault on the Vendrien Guard. Since Tunon is not here to select the rightful bearer of this honor, we must turn to the Archon's proxy.
Decisions lie before us!
Are we going with Ashe and the Disfavored, or Nerat and the Chorus? Choose wisely! Whichever one we select is going to be our new BFF/inadvertent power base for the rest of the game, no betrayals or take backs!