Part 30: Furniture
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Back to the days when I could barely imagine the happiness I have today.
I was a middle schooler at the time. A normal girl, who imagined about love, as is normal at that age. But I really should not have seen that dream... Because I am furniture. Furniture is nothing more than a tool, and is not human. To a person less than human such as myself, just receiving my education was more than enough to make me happy. So even thinking about love was more than I deserved...
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BGM: Moonlit Night
On this day, Eva's family had visited the head family on Rokkenjima. The three people from Krauss's family and the three people from Eva's family had gathered in the parlor, and were having a friendly chat as they reported the news. Genji had supposedly told Kinzo of Eva's family's arrival, but he hadn't come down yet. He was probably immersed in his own 'research', and couldn't spare the time. This often happened, so the others waited patiently for their fickle father to come down.
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Jessica made an openly displeased face, as though she'd known it would come to this.
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A full smile rose to Jessica's face as the results of her own 'studies' were finally noticed. Eva smiled back in the same way. Then, she turned that smile towards Natsuhi.
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Jessica was still at the age where she was a novice at studying for tests. Recently, she had clashed often with her mother, who was enthusiastic about her education.
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Shannon hadn't actually done anything wrong, but Natsuhi, who felt like some shame to herself had been shown, lashed out at her emotionally. This was something that often happened in the Ushiromiya family. But it seemed that Shannon wasn't strong-willed enough to accept it that way.
She shrunk back, and prepared the black tea while cowering. She had the unfortunate habit of making more mistakes when she cowered. Her pitiful appearance dispersed the peaceful atmosphere that had been there until just a moment ago. That wasn't really Shannon's fault, but she thought she might be the source, and felt a pressure on her chest. Her shaking fingers made the utensils clang, and you couldn't have complemented it as graceful. The more pitiful everyone thought that was, the greater the silence grew, the more irritated Natsuhi looked, and the more Shannon cowered...
Shannon's thin neck felt like it was being suffocated and chocked by the death god of tension. At that time, George spoke pleasantly, blowing away the stiff atmosphere.
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BGM: Hope
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George gave her a small wink.
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The Ushiromiya family did not pamper their servants. If there was any awkwardness, they would be harshly punished. So it didn't often happen that they were given a helping hand like this.
Thanks to George's concern, Shannon was somehow able to get a hold of herself and finish serving everything safely. If she was calm when she worked, she could easily carry out her tasks elegantly and flawlessly. When the black tea was laid out on the table and the elegant scent drifted around, the room was completely back to how it had been, in a peaceful mood, as everyone praised George's knowledge. Shannon wanted to thank him for saving her, but it didn't look like she would get the chance. So she at least thanked him inside her heart, praying to God that George would hear it, and pushed the serving cart away.
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Shannon and Jessica could be seen in the rose garden. Jessica, who had gotten into a fight with her mother, still hadn't returned to the parlor, and was nonchalantly killing time like this.
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Whenever I made a careless mistake, and George was there, he would always naturally smooth things over and make things harmonious, I think. Maybe it wasn't something as direct as picking up a fork that had been dropped. But that was his way of caring. Even servants have pride. They want to fix their own mistakes by themselves. Because if a guest helped them out with that, they would lose face.
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Shannon had uncharacteristically refuted Jessica's words forcefully, so Jessica had struck back.
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Jessica loved teen magazines with this kind of story, and she was always getting excited talking about that kind of thing with her friends. She was very sensitive to these kinds of love stories. So this wasn't the first time Shannon had been exposed to this kind of story.
But this was certainly the first time she had noticed George as a member of the opposite sex. She was furniture, and George was an honored guest connected to the Ushiromiya family. She had thought that she wouldn't be allowed to even imagine any deeper relationship. So she hadn't thought of it. Jessica poked fun at it, even more happy that it was someone else's problem.
Shannon was doing her best to make sure that her blushing cheeks weren't discovered. So if George had shown up at a time like that, there'd be no way that she would be able to keep her cool.
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Shannon had to frantically try and regain her ordinary composure before George reached them...
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Eva's family had visited to apply for a business loan from the head family. Kinzo had vast resources, and he lent those out to his children. Of course, they did not borrow money because they were living in poverty.
What kind of business would they expand, using the vast amount of money that they borrowed? How much interest would be attached, and how long would they have to repay it? This wasn't a loan for those who didn't keep it. It was a loan for those who were on the offense. Kinzo strictly judged whether it was worth lending out his fortune, and afterwards, he strictly oversaw its use.
So this spectacle where relatives visited Rokkenjima and explained their business to Kinzo sometimes occurred. To the parents, it might be a situation where they were forced by nervousness to move a lot of money. But to Jessica, who lived on this isolated island called Rokkenjima, it was a precious opportunity to meet up with her cousins. So being able to talk with the occasional guest such as George like this, immediately cured her bad mood from getting into a fight with her mother a short while ago.
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As Shannon hung her head, she thought back on a scene familiar to those who worked in the mansion. Even Krauss, who acted haughtily towards his siblings, was still treated like a child by Kinzo. Shannon herself had often seen Kinzo slap Krauss and tell him to sit up straight.
It was probably very embarrassing to be coerced like that at his age. In the Ushiromiya family, taking care not to be in the same place when this happened was one of the great tasks of the servants. However, that meant that every time Shannon was in the same place, it was a mistake.
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George stretched as he said that. And he smoothly changed the subject away from something that was a little gloomy. This time, Shannon noticed it too. This person, George, could sensitively figure out the situation, and always changed the subject to something harmonious, out of concern. It had been so smooth that Shannon hadn't noticed it until today. Today, Shannon had to really admire that behavior of George's.
Almost all of the boys Shannon knew of her own age had been classmates during her education. But they were all young, and none of them had had the composure that George did. Even though he had been just another guest until a while ago, today, she couldn't describe him with just that.
But that was idle thinking compared to her work as a servant. Shannon tried to chase that away with a small shake of her head.
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Shannon was finally able to put her thanks into words. If you wrote it out, it wouldn't be very long, ...but Shannon had needed just a little courage to say that out loud. But George played dumb.
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It seemed that George's response had been more or less predictable to Jessica. Without thinking, she burst out laughing.
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Jessica made fun of Shannon as she remained silent, red-faced. George didn't know the details, but he naturally joined in, laughing the same way.
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George, as the oldest cousin, talked about his life experiences. Jessica talked about recent life on Rokkenjima. And Shannon talked about her recent work. They kept going on about these trivial things. Shannon, even if she found the others' stories deeply interesting, didn't feel particularly connected to their contents. She was nothing more than a servant, and she had no intention of delving into her master's lives. She wanted them to enjoy their time speaking with her, and was only pretending to listen intently and nod at the right moments.
But for some reason, she found talking with George deeply interesting today. Even for things that she would normally ignore, she felt like she could feel a kindness hidden beneath the words. For some reason, she wanted to know more things about George, no matter how trivial. So, she stared fixedly at him.
She thought that as far as looks went, this person Ushiromiya George... was probably, about average, and he didn't really stick out. But he was diligent, serious, and had a deep prudence which allowed him to understand people's hearts and show concern. But she had never been aware of these things until now. She might not have met him many times, but she had known his face for many years. Even so, she had not noticed once until now. So Shannon was embarrassed that she hadn't been able to notice, and she blushed. Maybe George thought that Shannon was listening to his stories intently, because he kept on talking about himself.
...But Jessica didn't miss that slight change in Shannon. So she turned the discussion around to the topic Shannon wanted to hear about most.
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Normally, just George's reaction would have been answer enough. But for some reason, as she was now, Shannon wouldn't be able to understand it unless he said it clearly.
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George looked fairly pleased about hearing his own charm described, but he was just a little surprised at this high praise. Jessica, sure now that her own imagination was right on, acted as though she could barely hold back her laughter.
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Maybe she wanted to say that there was one really close. Shannon avoided saying that much, drawing a final line as a servant.
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Maybe he had never been praised this much by a girl. George's face turned just as bright red as Shannon's.
As she watched the two of them, Jessica giggled sadistically.
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So it was probably unbearable fun for Jessica when their roles were finally reversed. George also realized that, so this time, he was content with being the one who was teased.
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When she heard Jessica's audacious plan, Shannon's face turned bright red with a 'poof', and a doughnut of smoke started to rise around it.
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Shannon's blood had all rushed to her head, and it looked like even she didn't know what she was babbling about. It seemed that Jessica, who knew how Shannon normally was, found that really comical. She couldn't hide her cackling laugh anymore.
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Jessica irresponsibly cheered the two of them on. Now, George was also hanging his head, red-faced.
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Since Eva appeared in what was already an embarrassing situation, both of them were even more flustered. Jessica watched and laughed loudly.
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Eva smiled bitterly, looking a little shocked.
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Surely, as a man, George wanted to find a partner by himself and take her back with him. So it seemed that he thought it would be a bit shameless to meet his partner for the first time in a marriage meeting arranged by his parents.
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From Eva's forceful appearance, and George's somewhat lazy one, the others could catch a glimpse of the scheme behind this marriage meeting. They didn't know who this other person was, but it was surely someone profitable to Eva's family in a business sense. This whole thing about having them have an engagement relationship until they changed registers to deepen the connection between the two families felt almost like a political strategy.
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As everyone related to the Ushiromiya family knew, Eva adored George so much that he was the apple of her eye. But that didn't mean she had pampered him. She had been strict with him, and had grown him into a handsome man who wouldn't betray her expectations. That's how he was the apple of her eye.
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George bowed to the two of them, and after bowing once more to Shannon, he dashed off to the mansion.
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As Eva giggled and smiled, she approached Shannon's ear with a hand over her mouth, as though she was trying to tell her a secret.
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BGM: Witch in Gold
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Those malicious words all poured into Shannon's ear without spilling a drop... To Shannon, it was like cold water was being poured in there.
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This was all whispered in secret. And with the same smile as before. Jessica, who could only see Eva's expression, didn't think it was anything other than Eva telling Shannon some embarrassing story about love. When their secret conversation ended, Eva patted Shannon's shoulders, as though she was urging her on.
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Eva laughed dryly and headed back to the entrance hall. Behind Jessica, who was cheerfully waving her hand, Shannon reflected very, very deeply on those words of Eva's, about knowing her place...
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BGM: Voiceless
I had forgotten. I am furniture. Furniture isn't human. So I am a being who must feel gratitude for even being treated like a human, and I am not permitted to wish for anything more. Even if people develop affection for furniture that they're used to using, that is an emotion on the human's side, and the furniture's side has no right to hope for that. They should just serve with simple honesty every day.
But that feeling I felt when talking with George-sama and Jessica-sama... is a forbidden drug for me. In other words, it may be an emotion I must not know.
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Natsuhi's words 'too distracted' were right on the mark. Even Shannon couldn't believe that she hadn't noticed Natsuhi until she had called. This was a time when she normally had to concentrate on the cleaning. But she had just kept sighing and hadn't accomplished anything...
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So she was always slow with her work. In contrast, Runon skillfully avoided important steps wherever she could. So she could compete her jobs with a result looked similar to an outsider, but in a much shorter time. In other words, she was good at cutting corners. Compared to that, maybe we should say Shannon, who talked back at Natsuhi when Natsuhi was in a bad mood, was bad at cutting corners...
Of course, there was nothing that Natsuhi couldn't stand more than a servant talking back. Her forehead creased, and she spoke sternly. And yet, her slow, admonishing style of speech was even more terrifying, and finally made Shannon realize she had said the wrong thing...
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As Natsuhi acted like her headache was troubling her, she headed off down the corridor... When she couldn't see her anymore, Shannon hung her head and sighed.
I had been careless, so something like this had happened. Even though I'm bad at everything I do, I should be able to at least carry out the cleaning as well as an average person can, right? It's because I can't even perform that well, that I'm so shameful and crying. What could be more shameful than this? Not only have I been unable to perform a single bit of cleaning well, but just now, when Natsuhi was scolding me...I was envisioning that person appearing and rescuing me.
If only George-sama were here. Would he casually step in and save me? I'm sure he would show up cheerfully, intentionally acting like he doesn't know what's going on, nimbly change the subject, and make me forget I was ever rebuked by Natsuhi... I kept envisioning him, suddenly appearing from the other side of the door, or the other end of the hallway. I envisioned the kind of person that would be an appropriate partner for him in a marriage meeting. And I envisioned how unfitting I am for him.
Eva clearly told me that. It has repeated endlessly through my dreams...
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Kanon was suddenly there. His footsteps were quieter than a cat's, and he left no trace he was there. She probably wouldn't have noticed him no matter how long he stood there...
The expression on Kanon's face was... hatred. He made that expression for Shannon, who didn't know how to do it herself...
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Kanon faced away, acting sulky. It was a dishonest reaction, very like Kanon, but I was a little happy. He was getting mad for my sake.
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Kanon then hung his head, and bit his lower lip...
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I knew Kanon's character well. Sometimes, he didn't reflect on himself. If I don't refuse forcefully, he will help me even if it means neglecting his own job...
Kanon was a little sad that his favor had been rejected, but he realized that in the end, going too far would also cause her pain, and he gave a single, small sigh.
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Kanon-kun's face showed that he still hadn't completely accepted it, but without being any more persistent, he disappeared.
...Even though Kanon-kun had given me words of comfort when I was down. Even so, I was dejected again because it wasn't 'him'. That in itself, was a sin. That went far beyond any dream the likes of me could be permitted to see, I don't know my place.
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...But if she didn't finish up cleaning the reception hall, she could not receive Natsuhi's permission to eat. That cruel Natsuhi had surely told the kitchen something to that effect.
I have to respectfully receive Madam's punishment. That's right. My position in the world is furniture, and I had been intoxicated by a dream that is beyond me...
I finished cleaning the hallway and I went to the reception hall. Maybe my hunger made my nose more sensitive. I could sense a delicious aroma wafting from the kitchen, which should have been far away, and my empty stomach was encouraged even more. Until I finished up here, I could not get any soup. I just had to prepare myself.
Several portraits were hung in the reception hall.
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...It was the portrait of the witch. That wasn't its true name, but everyone in the mansion called it that. The name of the woman with elegant blonde hair, drawn as the subject of that portrait, was Beatrice.
It was whispered that she might be the family head, Kinzo's former mistress. And also that she was the great witch who had given Kinzo the gold of the legend. The witch, Beatrice, master of the night on Rokkenjima. She was gracious to those who respected her, but she would surely curse those that made light of her. It was in Shannon's character not to neglect rules and beliefs such as those. So she thought of the portrait of her other master as that person herself, and always treated it carefully, treasuring it. And telling the witch that only existed inside the portrait the secrets of her heart had become part of her daily routine.
She was furniture. Furniture doesn't complain. Cannot complain. So she had no right to speak her mind about her difficult days. She had no right to open her mouth and say those words. So, she at least spoke her mind inside her heart. She spoke her mind inside her heart, using words she couldn't say aloud, and protested to the formless witch.
Of course, the witch didn't answer. She didn't console, and she didn't laugh it off. Shannon could only interpret that silence as she liked, as though the witch was responding agreeably.
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As Shannon wiped the dust from the witch's portrait, she spoke that inside her heart.
I certainly am incompetent and uncultured, just as Eva-sama said. I am not a person. So maybe I have no right to love... But in that case, why was I given a heart which can know love?
...At that point, Shannon held back her tears for a time. The sound of the rain, which had started falling, along with the chill air in the reception hall, made her feel as though her shabbiness had increased another level.
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The witch that didn't answer or laugh, ...answered, and laughed.
Was it her imagination? Was she hearing things? No, that's wrong.
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