The Let's Play Archive

Valkyrie Profile

by Esdim

Part 30: Emoticon Theater:

Yay, I'm back from the beach! Here's your fix for the night my goons:

Ok, one last soul for this chapter. My compass points to Flenceburg.

The scene opens with Harry Potter and his green friend making a run for it.

So that thing he has thrown over his shoulder is a woman apparently.

As big, green and ugly makes his exit Lezard warms up his awesome monologue abilities.

I am he who hath entrusted his soul to the eternal vortex of time.
Ye know me! And if ye do not, ye shall be made to know me!!
It shall be engraved upon thy very soul. Lezard Valeth!!
If ye shall accept the brand of Hel upon thee, thy sanctions shall in turn be lowered.
I shall grant thee thy deliverence of thy soul and ye shall come now before me!

And just as the calvalry arrives they run in to this.

Lezard summons a harpy to make his escape.

And beats a hasty retreat.

Back at fun castle...

Igor is on guard duty.

Elf girl tries to use a little magic on old greeny.

Unfortunately she fell asleep during Jedi Mind Trick 101, and Igor goes a little bit batshit on her.

Lucky for her Lezard steps in and switches Igor into off mode via some lightning.

Yeah Lezard is basically an enourmous dickhead to anyone he's not working with. He's still a badass though. Again, to keep me from posting forty or so pics of dialogue I present to you another episode of Emoticon Theater: dare you!

I thought so. You can speak the human tongue if provoked. Ah well.
Of course, if a human were to couple with one of you elves it would be little different than engaging in a liason with a doll.
But then, since Bellion here is a homunculus, you two puppets would be perfect for each other! Ah ha ha ha ha ha!

Go to hell!

Heh. Do you take offense at being called a puppet? Then perhaps I should call you...

-dramatic pause-

-Vessel of the Gods.


Suprised, my dear? Then listen well.
I have found the "Philosopher's Stone". Even you must know what that is.

The Philo...sopher's...Stone...!!

However, the wisdom sealed within the Stone cannot be gleaned so easily. sadly the legends were a bit off... the Stone does not transmit all the world's knowledge instantaneously.

How did a devil like you...!!

*Brief note - Jesus lady, ease up on the exaggerated punctuation before my one key breaks*

Silence, puppet!! Stop assuming the human tongue!

Perhaps it was being irreverent in its way, but the first thing the Stone told me was this... Anything which claims to be "All" is nothing more than a deception, it said. Yet still, my seeking out of the Stone was quite worthwhile indeed. You shall become a sacrifice, a sacrifice to satisfy all my desires!


Ok that was fun. So as you can see Lezard is kind of a prick but whatever. Back to Flenceburg.

It's a party

As much as Lorenta likes to party out, after a bit she calls it a night heads for home.

Aww it's a kitty cat.

Lezard lives in the most hauntedest windmill-castle-thingy ever.

Practicing CPR at this time of the night? What's your game Lezard?

Ok, so Lezard is a bit cold-blooded as well as being an asshole.

Oh man what awesome spell is he gonna cast?!?

Face the fury of my TELEPORT!!!!!! It kinda kills me that everytime I think Lezard is gonna lay waste with some magic he ends up just teleporting somewhere. And who the hell says "NOW YOU DIE!" and then leaves the scene?

One thing I've learned from TV, When someone asks you to kill them it's usually a good idea to listen.

Lezard looks hardcore with the glow of WoW lighting up his face.

Back with the lovebirds...


Yoink. She won't be needing this anymore. Hmmm, perhaps there's more to this tower...

Which brings us here.

Ok we got all our souls for this chapter. Now we get to go do the man dance with Lezard. This is the last major seal reducing event for this chapter, so after this is a few dungeons. Kashell already went up for this chapter, so I'll just be training the others up in case.

More to come tomorrow!