The Let's Play Archive

Warcraft II

by Azzur

Part 4: Mission 4: Gruntinator

Episode 4: Assault on Hillsbrad or Gruntinator

: Hahaha, that's a good one, Maggy!

: Is true, mon! Da whole goblin! True story!

: Ahem.

: Ugh.

: Eh? Dis orc drink be stronga den I thought.

: No, that's just-

: My name is Gul'dan, troll. You would do well to remember this face.

: Ah.

: Er... so what can a humble orc like myself do for you... your, uh... magical greatness or whatever?

: Doomhammer wants the nearby human settlement razed completely to the ground.

: Uh huh. And you're here... why?

: Because I want you to take along one of my experiments in this battle.

: Dis mon crazy, mon?

: Not like there's any point in arguing. I swear, I don't even get to make decisions anymore. Where is this "experiment"?

: Me experiment!

Later, atop a frozen island south of Hillsbrad...

: ...and that's when Gul'dan released Vilefeast into our custody again.

: It's great to have you back, Vilefeast! I can't believe that Gul'dan is finished already.

: Me glad be back! You make new friend, too! Silly hair like bird!

: So dis guy be ya soldier ya lost before? Don't seem like much, mon.

: Well, you'll get to know him. As a matter of fact, I want the two of you to scout this island. Don't want any human settlements cropping up around here.

: So... ya name Vilefeast?

: Yeah. You name Maggy?

: Is Mag'fon, brudda.

: Magron?

: Mag'fon!

: Mega fun!

: ...ya, mon, whatever.

: Dis seem like a good place ta watch for da humans, Vile.

: Me like humans. Squish like snow in feet. Tee hee!

: Ya... ya...

: Alright, Bloodgut, now that Vilefeast is back, we're going to need alot more food. We've been able to ration with him gone, but now...

: Already on it, Chieftain.

It's good to fall into a habit of constructing farms as soon as possible, since the game typically starts you with more units than available resources. It doesn't hurt to make a few back-ups either...

: So what do you think Gul'dan did to him?

: Ha! Vilefeast is too dumb for magic to affect, even Gul'dan's. He probably gave up on the big lug and shipped him off to us. Not that I'm glad to have him back or anything, just good to have another blade on our side.

: Indeed, Chieftain. Speaking of which, I have constructed the lumber mill for our ships. Something I assume we'll be needing since the town of Hillsbrad lies across the sea.

: On that note, our shipyard is nearing completion as well.

: Your words are saying only one thing to me.

: Chieftain?

: And those words are: "Take the death boat and go joyriding."

: Wait! Chieftain!

: I can't hear you over this death boat!

: ...I liked it better when water scared him.

: Well, at least there's some nearby oil. That should get our rescue party well supplied for when Nigel doesn't make it back tonight.

: Hmm... oil. I think I recall a number of goblins speaking about it before...

Getting a shipyard also opens up two more advanced buildings to construct: the foundry and the oil refinery. One can only guess to the wonder that they will bring to us!

Further north...

: Boring... boring... trees... islands... ho, hum.

: Now we're talking! All hands, open fire!

: You just got chieftain'd. Now to assist your little platform here. Heh heh.

Back at base...

: 'Ey, Vile! Dere's humans along our coasts!

: Me axe!

: Wat? No, mon! Ya need a boat ta reach those humans.

: If boat can reach humans then...

: Me need boat.

: Given our current situation, I believe it would be wise to avoid conflict in our shipping lanes. I've just the solution...

: And of course I went through the trouble of making this-


: Well, Vilefeast, I was just saying that this was a-

: Yo, Bloodbelly, dis ting look craaazy! Wat is it?

: I'm trying to tell you two!

: Well tell us den, mon.

: Yes. Me made all of ears.

: ...It's a foundry.

: Fasc'natin'

: Facilitating.

: I can't believe I actually miss Nigel.

Foundries are like the blacksmiths of the sea. They upgrade ship weapons and armor as well as allowing access to the second tier of naval units. Unfortunately, we only have one of those units open on this map, but it's pretty much the core "tutorial lesson" for this level.

: And not that the two of you care about the economic end of things, but we have another oil platform built, which allows me to show off the second stage of my planning.

: With the construction of a refinery, he can simply drop off his cache there and return to work. All this is done without disturbing the human blockade.

: Ah! There! The refinery is complete and will allow easy access for our tankers. Impressive, yes?

: What's boat?

: ...Ugh. Fine. Fine. I'll get back to balancing the coffers. Mag'fon? Deal with the blockade how you see fit.

: Aye, aye, Bloodbelly! Alright, Vile, lemme tell ya how to work a destroyer...

A few moments later...

: Git 'em!

If an enemy ship is close enough to the coast, a few ranged units can actually deal significant damage to it with too much harm to themselves (assuming they have a destroyer to take the enemy ship's attention).

: Wooo! We chased 'em off, mon!

: This dumb! Me thought boat be used different!

: I suppose that our armada is coming along nicely, so I may as well set about training some new troops.

: Perhaps even consider working on some better weapons. I certain that Nigel will be glad when he returns, and a happy Nigel is a quiet Nigel.

Also pointing out that we can now construct a third vessel at the shipyard; the transport. This is exactly as it's name implies: a transport across the sea. I'll delve into this more when we actually use them.

: Huff... hu... Someone say my name without saying Chieftain first?

: Chieftain! Where have you been?

: ...Funny story.

A few hours ago...

: Hahaha! I'm untouchable! Oh, you want some? Let's dance, human! None can compare wit-

Back in the present...

: You swam here?

: What are we stating the obvious today? You've gotten fat. And your hair is more stupid than Mag'fon's.

: ...That was uncalled for.

: No, we're stating obvious things, Bloodgut. The obvious thing to say would be, "Let's get a bunch of death boats together and kick some human ass."

: ...Am I really getting fat?

Later, in the sea south of Hillsbrad...

: Ah, now this is the life! Open sea before me, heavens above me, and a weapon of apocalyptic power beneath me.

: Vengeance is a dish best served immediately with a cannonball.

: Oh, hey, I even secured one of them oil thingies.

Back at base...

: Yo, Vile, me mon! Git up! Da humans be here!

: Vile! Brudda! Talk ta me!

: You wan' some o' me, elf? I... I... Dis is fer da Amani! 'Dis is fer Vile!

This is why it's always good to upgrade your weapons when you can. 1 v 1 turns into your favor very quickly.

: ...Vile. I dunna know wat to tell Bloodbelly.

: Erm... Bloodbelly, can we talk about da Vile mon?

: You talk about me?

: Vile! Brudda! But I saw ya die, mon!

: Me no remember. Sound fun though.

: But... I... I can no figure it out.

: Mag'fon, it sounds like guard duty has stressed you out some. It's understandable. We'll be moving out to take Hillsbrad soon, so you can get some exercise.

: Ya, that must be it.

: Foreshadowy!

At the shores of Hillsbrad...

: Heh, human technology is no match for orcish... uhh...

: I guess I can call it technology... I think these armor plates are held on with spit.

: No matter! Fire all cannons! I don't want a single human to tell the tale about to be recorded in their blood!

: Heh, "a tale in their blood"... I'm adding that one to the Tome of Chieftainisms.

: Hm?

: Well, hello there, Hillsbrad! What's that? Bombard your shipyard with death boats? Why I'd be glad to!

Meanwhile, at base...

: Everyone in the transports. We move against Hillsbrad tonight, and we'll be drinking dwarven rum by the morning!

Here we have a full transport. As you can see, it only holds six passengers, which makes it somewhat frustrating. However, those of you familiar with Starcraft mechanics will note that each unit, no matter what, only takes up one space. That means you can have a transport with a full six catapults/death wagons. Always good to know.

: Me thought you no drink?

: Bwahahahahaha!

: Well... I, uh, of course I drink!


: Just get in the boats!

Meanwhile, at Hillsbrad...

: These humans wouldn't know how to defend a city filled with knights, much less a shipyard.

: Heh... A city called Stormwind.

: Now to start causing some general chaos and mayhem.

: Hahaha! Make me swim in a frozen sea, will you!?

Back at base...

: Are we all in? Alright! Let's shove off!

: Me hungry!

: I gotta go to da bathroom, mon.

: We there yet?

: Vile be pushin' me!

: Nuh-uh!

: I hope I never have to do this again...

I wish all landings were this smooth.

: Haha! Battlefield! Weeeeee!

: Wait, Vile mon! Move together!

: The two of them working together is... scary indeed.

: Is that all of 'em, mon?

: Life detected.

: Me find them! Humans here!

: Good work, mon! Can you hear 'em breathin' or somethin'? Haha!

: I can feel them living.

: Wat was that, mon?

: Smash!

: Well good evening, everyone. Did I miss anything important?

: Chieftain, look at the two of them. They're communicating on a subconscious level. I think the humans may be in more trouble than even the First War.

: You take care o' da troops, Vile. I got their structures!

: Mmm... like old times!

: He's right you know. This is just like how we were... back then. When times were simpler.

: Haha, like when Vilefeast tore the head off of an ogre?

: Exactly! Old times!

: Me glad to be back, Chieftain!

: And I'm happy ta work with ya orcs! Ya good folk!

: Y'know... I think I'm actually... happy. Let's do this one altogether then.

: Victory!

: Victory.

: Vilefeast! We were doing it altogether!