Part 27: Flight Log 21 - Lt. Damon Lane
[Flight Log 21 - Lt. Damon Lane]
Hey baby. My man Lance said he had a date tonight (probably with Zero, if you catch my drift), and couldn't be updatin' his flight log today. So he called on all of the women's favorite pilot to update for him. Welcome to the Nomad show, ladies. Buckle up and prepare for the ride of your life.
There was some big ol' ship out there waitin' to be blown up. Normally I'd go on these missions, but this is the only time that all the pilots are on, and the CAG needs to get her groove on sometime. So where does she go? That's right, those cats might be dogfightin', but Nomad delivers the payload, if you know what I mean. Yeah, baby.
There was some sorta announcement about Spyder finding a distress beacon. I wondered if it was that courier with that batch of sex toys Stiletto ordered. I'll tell you what, that is one cold bitch. She needs a little bit of the dark meat to lighten her up, know what I'm sayin'? But she seems to be lookin' to get some from Casey. I dunno why babes would wanna go with some rookie instead of an all-star like Nomad, but that's their loss.
Maestro made a comment I've heard plenty of times in my life, but this time he wasn't talking about catching a glimpse in the locker room after playin' some b-ball in the ship's gym. And I gotta say, that was one pretty big ship. I think them bugs got some sorta little man complex.
Maniac made a comment about them Marines bein' slow. I guess they took a tip from the Nomad, since goin' slow is what I'm all about. I like to take my time when I'm insertin' my shuttle into their docking port too.
The Marines finally made their way in after letting the boys have their fun with the foreplay with the alien fighters. I would have wished them luck, but I was busy watching the CAG wrap those big lips around my......well, never mind.
While Lance was playin' around with one of the bugs' ace fighters, the Marines were rollin' through the ship up to the control deck. I can't say I'm unfamiliar with the control deck, since there was this one time that I took that new Asian pilot underneath the flight control computer and had a little talk with the canoe driver.
Dekker and his boys were worried about the main engines starting up. I wasn't worried about it, because I knew my man Lance was as good at taking ships down as I was at going downtown on the ladies. That ship would be toast before you could say "Oh my god, Damon, I've never felt like that before!"
Me and the CAG had finished up just a few minutes previously, and I was having a cigarette while she went over to the terminal and told the flight squadron to take that ship down before it could take out the Midway. It was funny watching her try to get herself in order before sending that message out. She tried to play it off like the sweat on her face was because she was nervous, but I knew the truth. A gentleman never tells, though.
Aurora had come into the room and was looking at me out of the corner of her eye while the CAG was giving instructions on what the flight squadron needed to do. Yeah, I knew that look from Finley, and realized that after this mission was done, I'd be in the science lab giving her a little biology lesson, if you see where I'm going.
Lance blew up the Ship Killer, just like we all knew he would. Those bugs started threatening the whole human race or some shit like that. They needed to chill out, maybe smoke a little of that good stuff from back in the Jinsha Valley. Whatever their problem was, I'm sure it wasn't anything that a little groove time wouldn't fix.
Finley started talking about some of her science shit that she's always yammerin' on about before I kiss her to shut her damn mouth. Meanwhile, I was over in the corner of the room pressing buttons on the computer with my johnson, which seemed to distract the CAG. It's always funny to throw those girls' concentration off when they're trying to do their job.
Lance wanted me to show his flight stats. He gets awfully proud of that, although I've never really cared too much. I figure right around the time he was checking these, I was on my way up to Aurora's room to help her "concentrate". I hope she was dressing up like the naughty college physics student. That's my favorite one of her outfits. Anyway, I gotta split now, I got Rachel coming up to "tune up my exhaust pipe", if you know what I mean. Catch you sexy ladies later.
G'mar Mission 3 *** (the Ship Killer is pretty fucking cool.)
(last chance to get votes in for the Vampire or Devastator. You have up until whenever I decide to do the next mission, which will probably be either tonight or tomorrow.)
Edit: Oh yeah, Psion gets a shoutout in the Cutscene video.