Part 1: SIGN PAINTER SIGNS

(no signs)



From across a small divide, another mysterious pipe appeared up in the sky.
Its opening looked warm and inviting...
The Goo Balls seemed to wonder where it might lead.
-the Sign Painter

How did I get up here?!
-the adventurous Sign Painter



This cave looks like it's been undisturbed for thousands of years...
Until now!
When the pipe broke through the ceiling above, the sunlight must have blinded these rare Albino GooBalls.
They didn't seem to notice when it began to snow.
Maybe they would wake up if they had something to jump onto.
-the Sign Painter



The Goo Balls were excited to explore the mysterious pipe system...
...even if it meant traversing ridiculously contrived terrain.
One of the goo balls seemed to say he felt like an armadillo. Moo!
-love, the mysterious Sign Painter



A new species of GooBall!
I must say, they look quite beautiful...
Maybe they have commitment anxiety, I'm not sure,
but it looks like they can be easily detached from each other
-the helpful Sign Painter

If a Goo Ball falls into a well 10 meters deep...
and climbs up 3 meters each day...
but slides down 2 meters at night...
will he still look fabulous in the morning?
...maybe if he were to brace against the walls as hard as he could, and believe in the power of friction...
...he could leave the ground behind...
-your friend, the Sign Painter



Some winners are bigger than other winners!
Look in each area's MENU for more important information.
-with distinction, the Sign Painter



The Goo Balls on this side didn't seem to like the Goo Balls over there on that side...
I don't know, they look the same to me.
Totally delicious.
-the Sign Painter



Open the gates and fly, monkeys, fly!
But don't forget about me, ok?
-sincerely, the Sign Painter



Fisty swore he would never be like those tadpoles that grow up and shoot colored gems out of their mouths.
But he wondered what it might be like.
-the Sign Painter



Go as fast as you can! They are stronger than you think...
They will have to work together to climb very high...
...a real Tower of Goo!
Some of them felt they had done something like this a long long time ago...
...but things were more experimental back then.
-peace, the Sign Painter!



As the sun set over the last of the hills, one of the Goo Balls seemed to say...
...that life sure seemed like a giant physics simulation!
...but as he fell into the spikey death pit below, he knew it probably didn't matter
-love, the Sign Painter

It says...
'Hello, this is MOM.'
'Are you there?'
'Are you coming home?'



The last of the Goo Balls didn't seem to know that they were extremely delicious
or about the nature of the smelly pit in which they found themselves.
They said something about this being the last level of the first chapter...
...whatever that means.
-the Sign Painter

You might be on to something...
It will be a tight fit, you might have to leave some behind...
but that's probably ok, we're all in it together
-the signpainter was here too

They say this is the highest point on the entire island...
As the sun rises, you can almost see forever...
...but I wonder what you might see if you floated a little higher...
-we'll meet again, the Sign Painter





I'm back! And just in time...
There's a drop of water dangling from that cliff...

And I think it might be alive.
Yuck. I'm not touching it.
-the long lost Sign Painter



For miles around, there were reports of a giant spinning wheel in the sky!
Everyone is crazy but me.
-the Sign Painter

Somewhere on this Island is a power source.
And it generates electricity for the entire World.
Lately, its output has been less than satisfactory.
...
It looks like it's going to rain tomorrow!
-the Sign Painter



The windmills were supposed to be a source of cheap clean energy...
...to power the entire world.
But they weren't enough.
And a different source of energy had to be found.
-the Sign Painter



It allows only meticulously screened Goo Balls onto the main island.
You can't be too careful these days!
Especially since the power source for the entire world is located somewhere on this Island.
But...
Try not to snap the fragile worker cable, it appears to be made from heavily processed Goo.
-the free Sign Painter

These should be used for legally acceptable fun and recreation.
Not for circumventing security systems.
It's for our own good.
-the Sign Painter

A secret disposal hole down this way!
It's good for quietly disposing of unwanted visitors...
-the visiting Sign Painter



Of all the goo, and of all the balls...
...who's the prettiest of them all?
-the Sign Painter

A red pipe!
It appears to be very exclusive.
Only certain types of Goo are allowed to enter.
-the Sign Painter



Everyone is welcome!
...they're legally obligated to say.
But she'll never get down there looking like this.
There's another pipe way up there she might enjoy.
-the Sign Painter

It's a very pretty flower.
I wonder what happens if you get a little closer...
-the Sign Painter

This pipe sure is sucking! It's probably best to stay away.
Don't forget to whistle!
-the Sign Painter



Where did everyone go?
-the Sign Painter



They seem to follow the whistle.
One day, if they ever put together a companion DVD of their adventures...
One of the Goo Balls will probably say:
We got the moves, and you got the grooves!
-the classically trained Sign Painter



We must be getting close to the power source.
But what is it?
Coal?
Nuclear?
Wind?
...
Goo?
It's probably something more elegant.
-the Sign Painter

It says...
'Be good.'
'MOM is watching.'

It's so simple.
-the original Sign Painter



Smile for the cameras!
Everyone is looking so fabulous tonight!
Does she even know where that pipe goes?
Let's not tell her.
-the Sign Painter



The last of the Goo Balls didn't seem to notice
they were in some sort of giant Beauty Pageant Machine.
Pretty ones over there, Ugly ones over here.
Personally, I think everyone is beautiful.
Mostly me.
-the devastating Sign Painter

There must be some way to cross this pit.
Maybe if you fill it with the shattered pieces of those less fortunate than you.
-the Sign Painter

It's almost winter, and there is electricity in the air!
It's unclear whether it's anxiety or...
...because the POWER SOURCE is very near.
-the tingling Sign Painter

...
She's beautiful.
I mean, I'm glad this isn't Hi Def or anything...
...she looks fantastic for something hundreds of years old.
But who is she?
-see you on the other side, the Sign Painter





This whole island is a factory!
It appears they are doing outsource work for World of Goo Corporation.
Probably building some kind of new hi-tech product.
...way over here on the other side of the world!
But where's the pipe?
Looks like that guy's giant head is in the way.
Possibly the result of poor local management.
Out with the old, in with the new. That's what I always say.
-the Sign Painter Management Supervisor

The fire flickers with possibilities.
I wonder what happens if you get a little closer...
-the Sign Painter



More mysterious pipes appeared up in the sky!
What are they building in this factory?
There is a rumor...
'Everything changes in Chapter 4'
...whatever that means.
-the intrepid Sign Painter



On a far away hill, Fisty thought he saw someone!
He waved and hoped one day they could be friends.
Oh look!
A new species of Goo Ball!
It's not immediately clear if they are...
...alive.
...or dead.
Probably polite to pretend we don't notice.
-the Sign Painter



A horrible new species of Goo Ball! It's the most vile of all...
They are extremely rare, and as a result, have become quite lonely.
I think I read online somewhere that when they attach to other Goo Balls,
they sprout dozens of 'love spikes' that can grab onto almost any surface.
And won't let go.
The other Goo Balls try to avoid eye contact.
-the Sign Painter

The prettiest ones are always the deadliest.
Her thorns are filled with poison and contempt.
-the deadly Sign Painter



...glarggf...
...glrgl...
-the Sign Painter is sinking

It says...
'Be careful.'
'Clear your cookies one hour before swimming.'
'MOM knows best.'



They can do this the easy way...
...or the hard way.
Either way,
everyone's a winner!*
*according to recent online polls.
But some winners are bigger than other winners.
-the statistically fantastic Sign Painter

I'd get out of here if I were you.
-the Sign Painter



These walls look weak.
But maybe it's because I've been working out.
I'm so firm and well-toned.
35 minutes of cardio
then upper torso
and abs
It's really hot in here.
Especially down that way.
Good thing there aren't any explosives nearby.
-the Sign Painter

What kind of factory designer would put deadly spikes all over the walls?
If only there were something to grab onto...
-the Sign Painter is dangling over the fire like a spider



These must be the robots that built this factory.
I thought they had all been torn apart and scrapped for parts years ago.
Oh look!
There's one left.
It's so cute!
But the pipe is right behind his head.
Well...
...you can't stop progress.
-the Sign Painter

Shhh...!
Sticky Bombs were supposed to have been outlawed.
They are extremely dangerous.
And stick to any surface.
Good thing it's sleeping.
-the law abiding Sign Painter



These cliffs have become extremely sticky after years of waste residue buildup.
-the Sign Painter

The smell...
burns...
eyes...
Good thing I'm not here right now.
This garbage dump must be where the whole Island's waste and evidence comes for disposal.
Judging by the buildup, we must be getting close to the launch of the new Product.
-the Sign Painter



Happy New Year!
The last of the Goo Balls didn't seem to notice...
...they were part of an internationally televised World of Goo Corporation Product Launch Event.
The color pamphlet they were handing out indicates the product will change the world forever.
Shhh...!
They are about to reveal World of Goo Corporation's new 'Product Z'...!
-see you after the show, the Sign Painter





Welcome to the Information Superhighway!
A land of beauty!
A land of science!
philosophy!
architecture!
fan fiction!
Everything you see, from the water to the leaves are made from sweet free flowing information.
See if you can catch some information on your tongue!
Of course...
...the whole place was abandoned years ago.
This must be all that's left.
-SignPaintr4evr



This place is falling apart...
But the Information Superhighway isn't all green, you know.
It used to be beautiful.
The video drivers must need upgrading.
I bet we'll be able to tighten up the graphics around level three.
-the Virtual Sign Painter



It says...
'This area is infected. Keep out.'



That must be the thing that renders all the graphics.
The creative heart of the Information Superhighway.
Once it's upgraded, the manual says it will offer 256 stunning colors!
But my favorite color will always be green.
-the Virtual Sign Painter



Everything is filled with stereo sound and hundreds of colors!
The simulated water splashes over the shattered pieces of the Information Superhighway.
-the traveling Virtual Sign Painter



It looks like this socket is BLOCKED!
LOL
ROTFLMFAF
Did you know?
Users used to wander the Information Superhighway sniffing for ports just like this
to see if they could gain unauthorized access.
But sometimes it was a trap.
...
Brute force might work.
But sometimes it requires billions of years of computation!
Maybe if you strategically slide the variables around...
...the data will fall right into place!
-the totally 1337 Sign Painter



I wonder what they are talking about...?
-the Sign Painter

An old electronic surveillance system!
These were built a long time ago
...to monitor communication between Highway Bandits.
But it was hard to know who's a bandit
and who's not.
It's probably best to monitor everyone just to be safe.
I wonder if it still works?
-the Virtual Sign Painter is Listening



I wonder what all these servers do now that nobody is here to use them anymore?
This one says it comes with a '99.9% stability guarantee'!*
That's almost 100%!
-the Virtual Sign Painter

It says...
'It's time'
'to visit MOM'



...
I scrolled up too far...
...and ended up here.
Where is this?
Some place over the task bar...?
...beyond the boundaries of the desktop...?
...do windows come here when they are minimized?
...how high does this go?
-the Virtual Sign Painter is falling, up up up

Hi MOM
Are you there?
...
...
...
-the Sign Painter



Balancing on the edge of the Big Recycle Bin,
the last of the Goo Balls didn't seem to know that they were extremely explosive
or that all the mail and files in the history of the Information Superhighway...
...were about to be undeleted!
-the Virtual Sign Painter

You're not supposed to be down here.
Where will all the spam and bad files go when they are undeleted?
It can't be good for whoever receives them.
-the Virtual Sign Painter





This is the tallest island in the entire world!
And these must be the final three challenges.
They will be very difficult.
You'll have to leave some behind.
But that's ok.
We're all in it together.
-I can see you, the Sign Painter

The telescope at the top of the island was supposed to see very far!
But it can't.
When a large corporation mysteriously exploded...
...the sky became filled with dust and smoke.
And nothing can see past it.
If only the telescope could get a little higher...
...it might see what's up there.
And discover why the Goo Balls climb higher and higher!
-closer and closer, the Sign Painter

We are very high up!
For your own safety,
and the safety of others,
please try not to drop anything.
-the accelerating Sign Painter



The raw, scientifically pure Goo is all that's left.
But they appear to be filled with hope and ambition!
I remember when I used to have hope and ambition.
Of course, they will never be able to build a bridge.
It's probably best to skip this area and never come back.
Nobody will even notice.
-but the Sign Painter will know

The pipe is over that way.
But no one will ever get to it.
-the well adjusted Sign Painter



Remember when you found your first spinning kill blade?
We were so young back then.
Not that it matters.
Nobody will ever make it to the other side.
Can you see me waving?
-the Sign Painter

I'm not waving anymore.
Stop looking.
-the Sign Painter is waiting



The last of the Goo Balls were...
...
...uh oh...
...there aren't any more Goo Balls.
They must have all been sucked away by the pipe system...
All the Goo Balls from the entire world!
...all sucked up and sent to the former World of Goo Corporation campus...
...where they have been building a giant tower into the sky!
Probably a good thing too.
The telescope is useless anyway.
It's unable to see past that layer of smog and dust.
Well, without any more Goo Balls, I guess that's it.
We'll never know what the telescope can see...
Or what's really up there.
The end.
Thanks for playing.
Time to go do other things now.
Maybe write a travel companion.
I'm going into the Telescope now.
Goodbye.
Whatever you do...
don't play with the fish.
-your friend, the Telescope Operator
formerly,
the Sign Painter