Part 32: An unexpected face
Part 29: An unexpected face!
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So, what's the situation
besides the world's first dictator and the angriest Japanese warlord ever?
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Well, we've discovered a few independent settlements who are willing to pay us for services rendered. Including
Hong Kong? Where the hell are we?
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A land where time and space are all mixed up.
![](3-Kaz.jpg)
You, uh
you're kind of rolling with this a lot more easily than I thought you would.
![](2-Snake.jpg)
Eh. You get used to it.
![](3-Kaz.jpg)
Well, phase one of our plan to restore Mother Base is done. I've outfitted us with a primitive training facility full of solar-powered dart-throwers--no poison on them, of course, they're just toothpicks-- and a boulder-outrunning course.
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that's, uh
pretty hardcore.
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We can't afford to waste time getting these people trained!
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I'd better make another speech to the guys about how we're going to be giving our clients all the help they can get. Once more from the top...
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More savages right outside Milan. We'd better clear them out before they cause us any future headaches.
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Better get to work on a sailboat so we can explore around here better, too. Hey, doc, can you whip up anything to help us?
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I'm a computer expert, AI developer and psychology major, Snake.
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Ah. So until we get electricity you know absolutely nothing of value to help us.
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The perils of an overspecialized education.
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Sir! We've just got an envoy from another civilization! They look
American?
![](7-Strangelove.jpg)
Oh, my.
![](2-Snake.jpg)
George Washington?
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Yes. My scouts tell me you're called
"Big Boss?" What an interesting name.
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It's to the point. So, seriously, you're George Washington?
![](10-Washington_(Civ5).jpg)
Of course, sir.
![](2-Snake.jpg)
So
are you going to attack us? Are you sizing us up for invasion?
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Boss!
![](2-Snake.jpg)
Because
no offense, Mr. Washington, recent events have kind of made me a little paranoid.
![](10-Washington_(Civ5).jpg)
I understand. I had to fight off what looked like a bunch of Visigoths not too long ago. I assure you, I'm too busy tending to my own business to get into anyone else's. So, you're an army without a nation
are your services for sale to
anyone?
![](2-Snake.jpg)
Not anyone. Lately I've found it's safer to contract out to smaller settlements. They pay less, but they also have less reason to stab me in the back.
![](10-Washington_(Civ5).jpg)
Well, so long as you do not turn your weapons against us, I suppose things will be all right. I've fought against mercenary armies before, and won.
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Hessians, right? Well, good. Talk to you later, Mr. President.
![](10-Washington_(Civ5).jpg)
Very well, Big Boss.
![](3-Kaz.jpg)
We just finished the Kill Room and improved the command center, Boss! Mostly it's just a place full of grass dummies that our soldiers attack with spears, but whatever works, right?
![](2-Snake.jpg)
There's some kind of huge stone structure under the base. I'm ordering an excavation.
![](7-Strangelove.jpg)
Something useful down there, you think?
![](2-Snake.jpg)
Maybe
or maybe it'll just be a place for religious nutjobs to hang out at.
![](7-Strangelove.jpg)
I could use it! I turned an ancient precolumbian temple into a computer lab before!
![](2-Snake.jpg)
Yeah, what was up with that, anyway?
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The rent was cheap.
![](3-Kaz.jpg)
Snake, umm
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What?
![](3-Kaz.jpg)
There is a literal cult of people who worship shiny things starting up outside. Pennies, pearls, gems, it doesn't matter.
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Hooo, boy. Well, let's see if we can't apply a little judiciousness to it and steer it in a more productive direction. Like, say, collecting shell casings!
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Goddamn fools, the cultists are demanding ivory now, too! We don't have the time for hunting endangered species!
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The temple of SHINY THINGS has been unearthed! Rejoice, my brothers and sisters!
![](7-Strangelove.jpg)
NO! You idiots! This is my computer lab! Get out!
![](15-Great_prophet_(Civ5).jpg)
What's a computer?
![](2-Snake.jpg)
Give it up, doc. We'll need to get another place for you.
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Well, we've made it this far. Nobody's attacked us. We're doing better than I expected.
![](3-Kaz.jpg)
What were you expecting?
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Worst-case scenario? One of us gets kidnapped, I have to initiate a rescue mission, everything goes wrong and the world gangs up on me.
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Aaahh, you could handle it.
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Not if one of them shoots lasers at me from their eyes!
To Be Continued!