Part 105: Fake Update #22 - The Treasure and Super-Secret area
Fake Update #22 - The Treasure and Super-Secret area
Music - "Those Whom Have Left Long Ago"
Download (Thanks to Grawl)
Previously on Divine Divinity:
Finding the treasure maps...
I have found this strange scroll with a mysterious drawing and runes written upon it that make no sense at all. Have you ever seen its like?
Hmm... It's a map with strange scripting upon it maybe? I am not sure. As a matter of fact I have seen such a scroll myself. Here, let us compare them... hmmm... No, they are not identical, but maybe they come from the same source? They appear magical though, which is why I have never thrown my scroll away.
So it is almost worthless to you?
Er...yes, but now that you ask, maybe I could let it go for...
Spit it out man, how much do you want?
A mere 2... er, no... I mean 500 gold pieces.
200, and not a penny more!
In the far north-eastern room is this dead body. When you search it, you find...
Fake Update 22 - The Treasure and Super-Secret area
The first step is preparation. The treasure cave comes in two parts: The treasure cave itself, and the super-secret hidden bonus area which is accessed through the treasure cave. Accessing the super-secret area requires you to have a few items on your person.
Go to the Dwarven Halls - to the house on the map I marked as "Rimmer's Brother".
Tell me about your brother.
His name is Rimmer. Since he left for Glenborous I have not heard anything from him. I really miss the old fellow. I'm not quite sure if he's still alive.
If I see Rimmer in Glenborous I will give him your greetings.
Thank you human. That is very kind. Just tell him that I miss him.
Rimmer's house is in Glenborous just north of the town crier.
I met your brother Strobur in the halls of Karanamix. He sends you his greetings.
As a reward, Rimmer gives you 5 bottles of his special ale. Keep those, you'll need them. I think buying 5 of his bottles through the regular conversation option works fine as well, but this way you get 5 bottles for free.
Before you start to look for the treasure cave, you need two other things. The silver armor from the Stalker's cave is one of them.
The Silver Armor
Go to the Stalkers lair.
Things you need:
- 2002+ Gold
- 5 bottles of Rimmer's Ale
- 4 Treasure Maps
- The Silver Armor from the Stalker Cave.
- DROP any ropes you may be carrying.
- Save your game
Alright, now on to the treasure. Here's the completed map:
Follow the road to about this spot and head due west until you hit the cliffs.
Even with the map it's hard to find the entrance.
Hard to spot, isn't it?
The stairs are your way back out. Without having completed the map, you couldn't go any farther than this room. But with the map done, walk north through the spiderwebs to proceed.
Your enemies are mostly more Insane Skeletons, which you should know how to deal with by now (lightning).
Here is the bowl the map mentioned. We need to find three special gems to put in it. Thankfully, they're easy to spot. This place isn't that big, although you'll need to find some levers to open doors, there aren't really any puzzles of note. Or anything of note, actually.
I found all the crystals, time to use them.
Place all three into the bowl and they vanish, revealing a door.
gee i wonder what will happen if i touch this
OH LOOK A BOSS I AM SURPRISED
I WANNA OUTA HERE... MOMMMMYYYY...
Wait! Maybe there is an alternative...
There is no alternative to death, mortal! ... Die!!!
Don't be too disappointed if I survive...
You're not the first one who's been trying to bury me...
He immediately attacks.
Anyway, now we fight it. He's level 35 (wimp), does 28-92 damage (hits like a girl who is not good at hitting things although I realize that many girls are good at hitting things my point is that this guy sucks) and he has under 1400 HP (pussssssssssy) and no resistances, so...
Done, gone, can we have cake now?
Once he dies, the wall to the south vanishes, releasing a room full of bats (seriously they're all level 4 and can't even hit me, what's the point), and then comes the treasure.
It sucks. You make money faster and quicker by picking up and selling magical items the enemies drop. I have 500,000+ gold, so really, any amount of treasure would be pathetic. But the treasure is not why we're really here.
At this point, pick one of the chests and put in all your gold EXCEPT for 2002 gold. You need to have exactly 2002 gold or else this won't work. It's 2002 gold because that's the year the game was released. Make sure you have ONE and ONLY ONE teleporter stone, and you have saved your game. If you're carrying any ropes, drop them.
You can walk through the wall here.
I took a video of the secret area to make sure I got all the names and faces matched up. Even so, I missed two. But I'm probably not going to put it up without a request, since it's not that interesting.
Pick up all 4 ropes, you will need them.
This is what the monument says.
If your inventory looks like this, then when you step on the portal stone in that room, it should work...
Welcome to the game's super-secret area. Because all the headshots are recycled, I'm putting the character's name in bold above the portrait.
Give up, oh thou servant of evil! The forces of good always triumph over wickedness
Ha! 'Evil' is just the name that pompous bigots slap on anything that doesn't fit into their narrow moral strictures! Enlightened self-interest always wins through!
Don't try to worm your way out with weasel words, sinner! Self-interest is selfishness and selfishness is evil!
Over-simplified philosophy is worse that no philosophy at all, dullard! I stand for individualism and self-defined morality! You just stand for religious zealotry!
It's not too late! You can give up your foul ways and join me on the road of righteousness. Think of your grey-haired old mother!
My mother sold me into slavery at the age of five and died in a knife fight at the age of eighty-six.
Ah! Like all shirking miscreants, you eventually blame it all on your up-bringing and society!
I blame nobody. I'm proud of standing up for ruthless individualism. There is no justice, there's just us!
You are an unrepentant heretic! I'll send you to Hell to discuss your theories with the Lord of Chaos!
Let's see you try, milksop! Maybe you'll see Hell before I do!
These guys are the personification of good and evil and they will battle constantly, neither will win. You can't aid or hinder either of them, but they will talk to you.
Don't be afraid friend. In the end... good will triumph
Stop fighting guys!
Don't get yourself involved. This fight is a personal matter and will never end.
If you say so!
Don't disturb me, hero. I'm quite busy trying to get rid of this piece of light.
Why are you constantly fighting?
This conflict is the foundation of the universe...
Continuing on are four hatches in the ground. Each is labeled with a sign nearby.
Story Department (Psychiatry/Imaginary Diseases)
Graphics Department (Plastic Surgery/Intensive Care)
Programming Department (Neurology/Toxicology)
I think you get the idea where this is going, now... This is developer self-insertion!
Actually, Story Department comes before Sound, but Sound would have required two screenshots. Open the hatches and drag a rope from your inventory onto them. Then you can climb down.
This is a novella about an adventure, written in German. It was never localised because it's not important at all, and it would be far too expensive, and that makes sense, it is about 250 in-game book pages, and 54 pages in Microsoft Word. It's huge. Two posters from the Larian Forums (AlrikFassbauer and Raze) provided me with an English translation of the text, so thanks to them for their help.
It has nothing to do with the Divinity universe or game, but if you want, you can read that here: Tales from the Lost Kingdom - Rescuing the Princess (although be warned it's very long, so read it later if you're interested).
There is a lever in each department which opens up the cell with the trapped developers. You can refuse to open it in conversation, but they don't mind. There are also locked doors connecting all the sections, so you only really need one rope if you have high lockpick skill.
Last week I beat Lar at Starcraft.
Did any of you guys work on Divinity?
Divin...? Ah, yes, Divinity... of course.
Do you want to buy some 'beer bottle objects', hero? I asked the graphic guys to make me two versions and they made me 21~
What can I do with 'beer bottle objects'?
Hm, don't know... But what should I do with them?
Thank you, hero. Now I can go home to my family...
Home? Family? Then how will you be able to do your work on the game?
Ah, don't worry. I'll take my PC home with me...
My family asked me if I had to work on Christmas, and I said, 'I don't know...'
But not in the Holy Night...
I'm not sure. Lar will find something for me to do.
If Divinity is going to be as successful as Diablo II, I swear I'll try everything to gently caress Jordan! I SWEAR!
Good luck then!
Have you already read my new book? Der Hüter des Taermons. You simply must read it.
Sorry, I couldn't send the translated files in time. It wasn't possible...
And what's the reason?
Ah, because they changed some things in the British ADSL system over here, nothing is working anymore...
Thank you for releasing us... especially me.
Why are you locked in here with the sound guys?
maybe I should have spent more time in Belgium. Then they might have asked me where to sit...
Stefaan: Yesterday I saw a new animation from the graphic department. Man it's really so cool! Amazing!
Really? I was told, it was only a pre-version and they had to overwork it because it looked so bad...
Stefaan: Oh, yes. Hmmmm, maybe I should have stayed with SOULWAX...
Oh! Good to see you, maybe you could help me. I need a new graphic for the sound system, could you please?
Yes, er, I mean no, I'm the hero in this game, I haven' t got the time.
Yes, yes, but maybe you could make it this way, it's really not that difficult.
It's not fair! They say I messed up the kitchen and the bathroom. But it's not true! I didn't do it! Honest!
You're sure? I saw you...
Really? Ooooh! I'll never do it again!
But I've heard you've already said that a thousand times before.
But this time... I really won't do it again... Really!
Yeah right! If you say so... *sigh*
Yesterday night I was a little bit drunk, I believe... I hope, there were no complaints about me...
Yes, I believe there are some good jokes floating around... Trying to get back into the house through the window and such things...
What? How embarrassing...
Andre: Thank you. I really have to check the story guys...
Why are you so mad?
Andre: Story editors! *hrmpf!* We make thousands of objects for them and they keep on cutting the story. And the objects they are actually using are set completely wrong. The statues weren't meant for the REDACTED ...
Fabian: I really hope Swen removes the OINK! It's everywhere, even in the spell effect sounds. If not, I'll hit this doggy all around Belgium. *meow*
And why don't you chase him now?
Fabian: *Yawn* It's not so easy... By the time I wake up, he's already gone home.
Wouter: If I have to make another die animation I'll... oh, sorry my mobile phone... please wait a second.
What did you say?
Wouter: Yes, the die anim... oh bugger... my mobile phone again... Sorry about this.
Kurt: Why should I re-do the recent characters. They are fine. I've done them with Release 4.
But I've heard, Release 4 is a DOS program. At least six years old!
Kurt: Yes, as I said. Everything is perfect.
Swen: Thank you for releasing us! Have you brought us some cigarettes and some Red Bull?
What's your motto, Swen?
Swen: Work faster! Work harder! Sleep less!
That's a good one!
First I wanted to be a game developer but then I changed my mind...
And why is that?
As a full-time tester I can always complain about their mistakes...
Have you visited the Larian webside lately. I really should update it with some new material. But the question is, what?
What about the new animations I saw in the other room?
Oh yeah, cooool! They are so nice! But I better ask Swen first.
If it's that dangerous why didn't you barricade it?
Well, actually... if you say that's really necessary, we might possibly consider... eventually... - oh, you're still here? All right, I'll put it on my list...
If you go down, you find the problem...
That shouldn't be too difficult...
It appears that this game is full of bugs!
VIDEO: Debugging Divine Divinity
This fight isn't that hard, Rank 5 Hell Spikes is perfect here, but pay attention to your health. I didn't, because I had minimized the HUD to look for the last bug, and almost died. Once they're all dead, return to Swen, and he has a surprise for you...
I will, Swen! I swear... ;-)
Swen: Richtich! Look in your inventory, hero... I think I have something interesting for you...
The silver armor you were carrying has been transformed... into...
The armor of Larian! Going by a ratio of Protection to Weight, this is potentially the very best armor in the game, even better than the DragonHeart breastplate. But I'm not using it because it is invisible once equipped.
Now you're done here. I hope you brought that teleporter stone to get out, because the portal stone which is -SUPPOSED- to take you out of the dev area doesn't work.
I believe this is what you call, 'irony'.
Next Time: The Ritual
Behind the Scenes
You can actually see the secret area on the overworld map.
EDIT: Now that it's no longer a secret, I made this special image I hope I never need to use again:
That wraps it up for side-questing. Next time, we start the journey to the end.