Part 14: Turn 9Turn 9
(we return to your regularly scheduled clowns)
Once again no "accidental" clashes with Eljudnir (or anybody else) to report. Looks like they're going to be our third neighbour pushed right up to their cap circle which is really nice to see.
First up, we stomp all over some indies in Darwin's End. Once again 5 enormous clowns kill 60+ humans with zero losses. They're so good, I'm feeling very vindicated in my bless choice right now. Look at all those numbers!
In our second indie stomp in Dragon Dreamcatcher there's fewer enemies and we have both more clowns and some of the unicyclists too. Surely this would be even easier?
Here's our brave boys - the clowns will fight the militia and the unicyclists fight the heavy inf. No problem at all.
Hmm the unicyclists were on attack rear and have gone zooming off, looks like I'm going to lose some jugglers unfortunately. Luckily some of the clowns have gone after them too and will clean them right up.
god fucking damn it
A nearly flawless victory! Clowns: 37 kills, humans: 1. It really sucks when you get random troops snaking through your blocks right into your back line and that really puts the dampener on fishing for bumps with the undead especially since winter has arrived now. We'll go for it anyway into Dikankan since there's still 8 enormous clowns, as well as 15 assorted humans, and I can't actually see any of the undead forces nearby. Maybe they moved back to the cap. It would be really nice if we got this province too as it would cut Eljudnir off from that little peninsula to the east.
U did actually take their cap circle province back this turn, but still was 119 gold so it was well worth it. Their force was a priest and a small amount of sacreds. I was actually pretty tempted to increase the PD again but that'd be grounds for hell-war for sure and 1) I want to maintain my reputation as an honest neighbour, 2) I don't want to discourage U from fighting the real enemy, Karanaac.
We did however get to see their bless:
That's hilarious, just +10 strength! This makes it pretty clear that U is going for the strat with just hordes of blessed freespawn feet (but more on that later). Their attack and defense is still pretty shitty though not to mention that they die in droves so I'm not sure I rate this especially highly. It's especially poor against the fire shield that Karanaac has almost certainly taken.
As a matter of fact U saw Karanaac's bless this turn and informs us that it is: shock resist 15, fire resist 20, heat aura, charged bodies, and reconstruction. That's...not good. Fire/shock resistance and reconstruction sure, everybody needs those. Heat aura is pretty suspect as it's surprisingly easy to get draws when your rock is surrounded by sleeping people that it just can't kill quickly enough. Charged bodies is just right out. You often have only one rock per fight and charged bodies triggers only once per unit. It is just a terrible choice. The lack of fire shield makes expansion pretty difficult and
We got our first Ancient Clown this turn! Pongy didn't roll fire but A3 is real nice for storm and thunder strike which will be a lot of my mid game battle magic. He doesn't actually have all that much research but we don't need/want to risk him in fights just yet so he's off site searching. First up will be the wastes (Land of Milk and Honey) south of my cap since they have many more magic sites than normal provinces. Plus it's an auspicious name for finding sites.
The Emerald Impaler also heads north out of the cap bringing another 10 enormous clowns and the other unicyclist force with him to reinforce in case of war with Eljudnir. The lack of mage support is annoying but not too bad this early on.
We can't afford to buy another Ancient Clown this turn and we don't need any more Thirteenth Clowns for expansion so despite our unfortunate loss we get started on a First Clown instead. Air 1, aStral 1, and then one more of air/astral/fire makes them my main choice for evocation casters. The air 2 ones can storm power/thunderstrike, the astral 2 ones can soul slay, and then fire is a bit unfortunate honestly but has its uses (site searching mostly) or will come in real handy if we fight the frost skeletons.