Part 10: Slaves to Molag Bal II: Dwarf Fortress

Slaves to Molag Bal II: Dwarf Fortress


Well folks, it's time we said goodbye to one of the oldest participants in this LP: Light Armor. The bonemold armor isn't nearly as good as our sick ninja armor, but I have a few raesons for switching to medium. Get ready for some infodump, people! For those of you who haven't played Morrowind before, the leveling system is a bit...strange. You probably noticed the x5, x3, and so on next to stats when I level up. Here's how it works. You get to tag three stats to improve when you level up, and the available increase for each stat is half the amount of increases to skills that govern that stat, with a maximum increase of 5. For example, if I wanted to get a lot of strength out of my next level, I might focus on Long Sword, Acrobatics, and Blunt Weapons. So that should explain why I've been grinding my conjuration so damn much. The medium armor will help me get that endurance of mine up for more health. Additionally, it'll be more efficient for leveling. See, Wizard Lizard has both Unarmored and Light Armor as tagged skills, and since he hasn't found a decent hat yet, and possibly due to his fancy robes, he's been gaining skill in both when he gets whaled on in combat. Tagged skill-ups lead to leveling up, and leveling up fast doesn't let us get optimal stats! So that's why we're going with this little change of pace.

There's another reason, though, and it's perhaps the most important of all:

Bitches love pauldrons.

So anyway, now that I've explained exactly how much asperger's goes into a serious game of Morrowind, I can post this.


I decided to go swimming in Balmora's canals to get a meaty speed increase. The only speed training befitting a Wizard Lizard if you ask me! Now, I don't mean to complain, but athletics training is slow as shit. I left the game running, using the autowalk function to keep Wizard Lizard breaststroking against a wall, and played New Super Mario Bros. Wii for ninety minutes.


That shit is criminal, and I just wanted to let you guys know what I go through sometimes for the sake of this LP.


SO ANYWAY, good sir Caius needs us to press this guy in town for info about the Sixth House and Nerevarine cults, whatever those are.


The guy wants us to go get him an ancient dwarven Rubik's Cube from Arkngthand(gesundheit!), a dwarf fortress. Fortunately, I've stumbled upon that fortress already!


Kinda dark in here, but as you can see, we've got a narrow footpath leading down to a pit. I'm excited!


These raiders took turns being stuck on a torch while I killed them with my SCIENCE HANDS. Man is it dark in here.


That's better.


I press onward, where JesusB challenges me to a Let's Play dance-off. I stab him thoroughly, then search the room. Lots of ancient dwarf coins to sell later.


I really hope there are some pokemon in there.


Nope, just some dead bandits!


Eventually I hit the Norfair portion of the fortress, apparently.


Oh man, this gap is way too large for me to clear with my meager acrobatics skill. If only I could make myself better at jumping by applying magic to myself somehow!


Oh geez, big guy with a hammer. Fortunately, my dagger is more than enough to whittle him down to death. Just beyond him is a little square room that appears to be a lava vent or something. This Nord had no business being here whatsoever.


Ooh, I like this part of the fortress. Very naturally-lit and spooky.


If anyone tells you cliff racers are the most dangerous part of Morrowind, they are goddamn liars. It is ancient dwarven murderbots.


Seriously, I only managed to beat Gutsman here because he couldn't fit through this door. Annnnnd I find that I fucked up somehow and didn't get screenshots of the rest of my journey. It was tedious, frustrating, and the puzzle box was in a room right near the entrance that I overlooked. So that was fun.


Welp