Part 28
Great. First it was illegal waste disposal. Now it's the black market. What next? Contract killing?
Oh, Slev. You and your slippery slopes.
Hey, if you're interested, I can think of a couple of folks I could do without.
...
Just thought I'd put it on the table.
Yeah. How about we all pretend that was a joke?
Sure. We can do that. I'm a pretty funny guy, after all. Get that all the time. People are always like "Scooter, you're a pretty funny guy. You should try stand-up."
Uh-huh.
I'll throw in an extra hundred grand.
We are not having this conversation anymore.
So what do you think my prison tattoo should be?
...
I was thinking about a kubar sign. Or is that too obvious?
We needed the money, okay?
Oh. Well, that's different, then. No judge would convict us with an excuse that good.
Except there won't be a judge, because we're not gonna get c-
This is the Galaxy Police.
...
Okay. Go with the kubar sign.
Can we help you, officer?
We've had reports that a Pata Pata Pitan smuggler has been active in this area lately. We're alerting everyone who passes through, just to be on the safe side.
A smuggler, huh?
Apparently he passes himself off as a Kukubian businessman who buys cargo directly from merchant vessels to avoid export taxes. Have you been approached with any offers of that nature?
No. No. Not that I recall. And I can recall pretty well.
Hmm. Well, if it does happen, we ask that you report it to the Galaxy Police immediately. And do not, under any circumstances, do business with him. I'm sure I don't need to tell you that trading with Pata Pata Pita is strictly forbidden.
Right. Sure thing.
We appreciate it. On your way, citizen.
You win. No more smuggling.
Thank you.
Right. First things first; I gotta make a quick call.
Greetings.
Mr. Zinn! Glad I caught you. You'll be pleased to hear that things have been going a little better for us lately. I reckon we're about ready to start repaying you.
I am indeed pleased to hear it. Will you be making a payment this week, then?
Yeah. I was thinking, say, two hundred grand.
...200,000 kubars?
Right.
The full amount, then.
Oh, hey! So it is.
...
That was...remarkably quick. When I extended your credit limit, it certainly seemed as though you would need the extra time.
Guess you just underestimated us.
Quite. Quite so. Bravo. Well done indeed. You're a reliable man, Mr. Tark'la. I'm sure you'll do very well in your future endeavours.
I'm sure we will. But hey, we gotta get back to work here, so I'll catch you later. Peace.
Hooooly shit.
I can't believe you spoke to him like that.
I am on top of Adrenaline Mountain here. Holy shit.
You don't think he'll make an issue out of it, do you?
Honestly? I don't give a fuck right now.
Holy shit.
Damn it. There goes the trend. And here I was gearing up to toss some more money into it.
I suppose it couldn't last forever.
Suppose not. Let's give it another week to see where it goes. If it's still on its way down, we'll get back to Bass and sell. And then I'll chew out our broker for giving us bad advice. And then I'll chew you out for hiring her.
Something to look forward to, then.
Incoming transmission, sirs.
Yo. Hey man. Hi.
This is Stubbs.
How you doin'?
Um...fine, thanks.
Listen. I'm jonesin', man. I'm jonesin' BAD. You got any water? I need your water.
I need it right now.
Water? Er, yes. We have plenty. I'm sure we could spare some for you.
No no man. No. Man. "Some" ain't gonna do it. I need all of it. I NEED.
All of your water.
All of it? I'm sorry, but that's not really-
I CAN PAY YOU MAN
What?
41000 KUBARS
Look. We can't just-
Whoa. Forty-one thousand? Seriously?
We can't, Tark'la.
For forty-one grand? I think we can, Slev. It's easy money. We'll just restock as soon we get to the next planet.
Okay, and how are we going to explain to the passengers that they aren't going to have any water until we arrive?
Well now. To that end, I think it's time we introduced you to two of the most useful words in the Kukubian language.
"Technical. Difficulties."
Oh. Of course. "Due to technical difficulties, we sold all the water on the ship." I'm sure that'll go over well.
You know what I mean. Besides, it's only a day or two. It's not like anyone'll die.
Am I getting my goddamn water or not holy fuck