Introduction
Who are you jerks?
Really? You don't know us? We've done two Ratchet and Clank LPs already. Fine. I'm kalonZombie, the informative one, and he's Ape, the funny one.
What is this game?
Ratchet and Clank was a game for the PS2 released in 2002. It's made by Insomniac, who originally made the Spyro the Dragon series on the PS1. This was their first game for the PS2 and on it's own merit, is pretty good. However, compared to later installments in the series, it's actually the worst game of the lot. Well, okay, maybe not the worst...
Really? Why's it so bad compared to the other games?
It's not BAD, it's just really, really different from the rest of the games. The weapons don't gain experience, Ratchet only has 4 hits through a good 2/3 of the game, voices and characterization are vastly different from the rest of the series, you can't strafe... It's a good game, and fun too, just not what most people are used to when they think Ratchet and Clank.
What's with the thread title?
Near everyone in this game is a jerk or an asshole in some way. I'll actually be keeping a running tally of Ratchet's jerkisms, and be keeping a list of EVERY major and minor character and listing how big of jerks they are.
Videos
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Bonus Stuff
EpilogueTV Commercial 1: Decoy Glove - Youtube Hosted
TV Commercial 2: Devastator - Youtube Hosted
TV Commercial 3: Morph-O-Ray - Youtube Hosted
The Making of Ratchet and Clank - Youtube Hosted
New Game +, Gold Weapons, and Cheats - Youtube Hosted
Sketchbook
Bearded Lizard Facts with resident scienceman, Ape!
Other things Ratchet and Clank related
Let's Plays
Moominbiscuit beat me to this game, and his LP is really hilarious.
THE FOLLOWING LET'S PLAYS ARE SEQUELS AND AS SUCH CONTAIN SPOILERS FOR THIS GAME (like who lives and such).
It's my and Ape's first real attempt at an LP. The first few videos have really weird ducking because I didn't know what I was doing and was using callgraph, not audacity, but if you can get past the initial hump, I think it still holds up.
A solo, mini-LP I did for the DLC game. I did the best I could given the game, honestly.
The best goddamn Ratchet and Clank game ever, and it's another LP by me and Ape.
Official Ratchet and Clank stuff coming out
Ratchet and Clank: The Movie, a movie based off the events of the first game. Looks... okay I guess?
Ratchet and Clank: Into the Nexus, a new PS3 game coming out soon. Looks good. Like, REALLY good.
WHO ARE THE JERKS IN YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD?
Voiced By: Mikey Kelly (AKA Michelangelo in the CGI TMNT movie, Alastor in Viewtiful Joe)
Who?: The main character of the game, you play as him. He's a lone lombax living on the planet Veldin, and when he meets up with Clank, he goes on a road trip across the galaxy.
Jerk?: Oh HELL yes.
Why?: Jerked the ship to interrupt Clank telling his serial number. Did not correct the chancellor about NOT being there to kill him for an infobot. Not agreeing to help Skidd until a hoverboard was in it for him. Refuses to save the galaxy and just wants revenge on Qwark. Insulting Clank at any moment he gets. Only saving the galaxy because Drek was going to blow up his stuff.
Jerk Level: Almost villainous levels. Don't worry, he gets better later.
Voiced By: David Kay (AKA Nathan Hale from the Resistance Series, Recoome from Dragon Ball Z)
Who?: The other main character of the game. Clank discovers a plot by a bad man and flees to find Ratchet to help him. He'll come in handy later!
Jerk?: Nope, not at all.
Why?: He's the only one in this duo who seems to be honorable.
Jerk Level: Absolute zero.
Voiced By: Kevin Michael Richardson (AKA the Shredder in the new CGI Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles show, Captain Gantu in Lilo and Stich)
Who?: The bad guy! He's an evil CEO of... some sort of company.
Jerk?: He's the main villain of a cartoony video game. So yeah, a jerk.
Why?: His current plan is to rip planets apart to build a new planet for his species, causing the death of millions through the galaxy, as opposed to just... you know... finding a new one. Also he had his cronies beat up a mayor. Then tried to blow up Ratchet's planet because it's in the "perfect orbit".
Jerk Level: His jerk is maximum.
Voice Actor: Jim Ward (AKA Orsino the Mage from Dragon Age II, XLR8 and Wildvine from Ben 10)
Who?: He's the dude Ratchet and Clank are on a road trip to find. He's a big hero in the galaxy, apparently.
Jerk?: Ayeup.
Why?: He didn't let Al get any lines and barely any screen time in his own commercial. Is working for the villain for the chance to be a spokesperson for the new world. Tried to shoot us down in a ship, then sold bogus Gadetron stuff to us.
Jerk Level: Almost Drek level.
Who?: The mayor of Novalis. C'mon, try to keep up!
Jerk?: Nah.
Why?: Because he gave us an infobot AND a ship. Dude's cool in my book.
Jerk Level: Nonexistant.
Who?: Some dude who works for a living. Also see: God.
Jerk?: Nah, not really.
Why?: He was cranky, but it's understandable since his planet was being invaded. Also he's pretty much one of the only people who sell us something and has a reason other then he's a jerk who wants money.
Jerk Level: Cranky, but not a jerk.
Who?: A SomethingAwful goon. Likely posts mainly in Inspect Your Gadgets and Batman's Shameful Secret.
Jerk?: Little bit, yeah.
Why?: Does that sarcastic "You're welcome" thing that I can't fucking stand.
Jerk Level: Minimal, but annoying.
Who?: Captain Qwark's fitness trainer.
Jerk?: Oh, the biggest one we've met in person so far.
Why?: She made us buy a gadget we rightfully earned, despite she KNEW she was supposed to GIVE it to us.
Jerk Level: Extremely high.
Who?: The embodiment of most things '90's.
Jerk?: Ehhh, kinda, yeah.
Why?: Fakes an injury to get out of trying to do things.
Jerk Level: About the same as those people who use handicap parking spots without the tag.
Who?: A slime ball who cares more about his cell phone than his clients.
Jerk?: Oh yeah.
Why?: Didn't even care that Skidd might be dead, but he DID care about his phone reception.
Jerk Level: Used car salesman.
Who?: Honestly I have no idea.
Jerk?: Yeah, I guess.
Why?: Working for the bad guys and beat up a mayor (maybe).
Jerk Level: Uhhhhhh... middle?
Who?: C'mon, we saved him from goofrogs.
Jerk?: Yeup.
Why? WE SAVED YOUR LIFE AND WE HAVE A FLAME THROWER JUST GIVE US THE BOOTS Also tried to mind control us. Twice.
Jerk Level: Capitalist pig and failed magician.
Who?: Can you seriously forget THAT MUSTACHE?
Jerk?: Hell no.
Why?: Because his entire battalion abandoned him. Of course he's gonna be a bit cranky.
Jerk Level: None.
Who?: A little shithead who's trying to dodge his responsibilities.
Jerk?: Yep.
Why?: Son you signed up for the army, you best not try to get out of your job.
Jerk Level: Draft dodger.
Who?: The guy who runs the Jowai resort.
Jerk?: Affirmitive.
Why?: Promised us an O2 mask if we took care of his problem, neglected to mention that we couldn't exactly solve his problem right away.
Jerk Level: Timeshare shiller.
Who?: Al's brother.
Jerk?: Not really, but his voice is annoying.
Why?: Idjit OH MY GOD I FUCKING HATE THAT PHRASE ARGH.
Jerk Level: Southern bumpkin.
Who?: A super chill guy who is the nicest dude in the game.
Jerk?: Hell no.
Why?: He's the only guy in the game who gives you something and doesn't make you pay or go on a side quest for it.
Jerk Level: Less than Clank.
Who?: Al and Bob's sister.
Jerk?: Only to Ratchet (which hardly counts).
Why?: Tells him to shut up when he makes fun of Clank (about time someone did).
Jerk Level: Hero to the people.
Who?: WHAAAAAAAAAAAT?
Jerk?: I CAN'T HEAR YOU.
Why?: DON'T YOU TALK ABOUT MY MOM LIKE THAT.
Jerk Level: THANKS FOR COMING.
Who?: A guy who looks like Adam Savage and invented the thing that makes Clank giant.
Jerk?: Former jerk, I suppose.
Why?: Invented a machine that made killer robots giant, but then made it so only Clank could use it.
Jerk Level: That guy who made fun of you in High School who you meet like 3 years after graduating and apologizes to you.
Who?: The guy who owns Gadetron.
Jerk?: Naaaah, he's cool.
Why?: He's like... a 9 on the grandpa scale (10 being Santa, 1 being Dick Cheney).
Jerk Level: Bunyon on the ankle.
Who?: The tutorial lady I disabled because seriously I know how to play the game.
Jerk?: No, not really.
Why?: She gives helpful tips and then a thing to help you find secrets.
Jerk Level: Bobble head.
Who?: When a Boy Zoni and a Girl Computer love each other VERY MUCH...
Jerk?: Hell to the no.
Why? Without her, there would have been no series, and Drek would have won.
Jerk Level: I made you bologna for lunch, sweetie, have a good day.