Part 26: Final Chapter - Sprong

Sorry about that. It's Brett. I have my blackberry back.

Um.

There's a lot of reasons I wrote this thread. Part of it was to sort out my own thoughts. Part of it was to try and get an outside perspective. And part of it was to tell my story.

I... I've had girlfriends, you know? I mean... every now and again. They always got along with Becky. Not B. Becky. I guess I've used her name enough and my camera enough that you already know by now. It's hard to know what to feel. Maybe it was a stupid idea to post this thread in the first place. Maybe you had fun following along and I hope so.

But this is my life.

And I had to decide.

Did I know what I wanted? Did I know all along that Becky was the right girl for me? Did I have to bite the bullet, risk everything we shared together? Maybe, really, I was ready to have love... or at least what I thought love was... maybe I was ready for it.

Or maybe I was being too overdramatic. Maybe at the end of the day, I was still young. Maybe Kiki was what I needed. The kind of girl I could have fun with - who could show me that I was still not entirely ready to grow up... and that I should embrace that.

Or maybe Erica. Maybe I'd passed her by all along as the nerdy girl. Maybe she had something to show me that I'd missed all this time. Maybe...

But I had to decide, finally, here and now, who I wanted.

Maybes aside, it was time to bring this story to a close.

Final Chapter: Sprong

I'd called him Dickbag, but it was he who I had to face at the end.

Conor held a contest every year. The girls got these token things, and you had to convince them to give them to you. After a few hours of it, it turned out Conor and I were tied for first place. Only three tokens remained.

Erica's.

Kiki's.

And Becky's.

It was like the end of a movie, the final stage of a video game, or the last part of a song. Either way, it was incredibly cliche, even for me.



Oh yeah, winner gets a cruise. I forgot to mention that.

LP Subforum, this is where I need your help.

At this point, I need to know who I should go for. Erica, Alex, or Kiki? And also... I decided to stand up to Conor. On my own. Without the Internet's help.



... Well, OK, I'm out of ideas. Help!



You're damn right we gotta talk.
...about what...?

...Shit, I hadn't thought that far ahead.

You want to just forfeit this contest before it starts, Conor?



I'm smart enough to know that listening never killed anyone.

I'm sure that wasn't true, but whatever.



There was no need to tip my hand to him now. Wait. Is it hand? Is that the right expression?

Just give up now, bro.



Hadn't he just asked me that?

Becky.



Yeah, well, me too.
Right. Well, that means I don't rattle easy. So what say we just play nice, huh?
Whatever, don't pull any punches for my sake.



More.
$1000
More.
$2000
More.



True love... or $5000? The answer was...




Deal.




Forget that chump! I'm in it for the long haul with a wallet full of cash!

The answer was both! Man, I was a lying prick!



And then...



Moment of truth.

And with that, the ladies came in.



Three single bachelorettes, each with a token of affection, and I was ready to woo all three of-



... Jesus, Erica. Way to ruin the moment.



Conor!



But before the words could leave my mouth-



Though I wanted to grin like an idiot and say "That guy is such a jerk!" It was moot. I decided to play it cool like it totally didn't bother me, even though my intestines felt like shit-filled snakes.



Alright. Erica was first. This shouldn't be too hard.



Why don't we go back to my pl-

No! I had to remember back to my first pretend date with Becky!



Why don't we go to the Tap Room?

Yeah, she'd like that better.



And so, the final battle had begun... hey, I don't know if I can embed MP3s here, so if you can just pretend The Final Countdown is playing, that'd be great.



We're leaving together,
But still its farewell



Erica, you'll give me your Fantasy Pendant, right?



And maybe we'll come back,
To earth, who can tell?



Erica, I really want to win this contest, just give me your Token and you'd really be helping me out.



I guess there is no one to blame
We're leaving ground...



We're not breaking any rules!



Will things ever be-

Pretend you really like me, Brett ... please?

...

Oh.

My.

God.

I wasn't trying to win a stupid contest... I was screwing with people's hearts and feelings and emotions... I could really hurt this girl.

It was clear what I had to do now.

...

Actually, it wasn't. I just said that because it sounded cool, but it really wasn't clear at all what I had to do now. I guess win this contest?



Erica, I will take you on the cruise with me if you give me your Dating Token.

Hey, it wasn't a lie. I'd take her. Why not?



I promise.



One down. All I had to do was seduce Kiki and I won.



Oh, you can stop pretending with Final Countdown and all.



Damn right!



Shit. He was talking to Becky.



I got a pendant, how about you?



Kiki already gave it to him?!
'


I was upset, but I had to keep my cool.



Whatever, Kiki. Becky, let's get it on.



Sanctuary would be too loud, The Tap Room would be too weird, and I had no desire to see Conor's distended nipples.

Let's go to the Nature Trail.



And so we went... to The Nature Trail of Battle.



It's so quiet.



Well, I thought it was! How was I going to get this guy out of the running?!



Uh, never mind! You just keep digging your own grave, Dickbag!



And with that, we listened to nature. It sounded like ellipses.

...
...
...



Conor, shut up!

I said it really happily, though.



DUDE STOP IT!



GodDAMMIT, I hate that guy.



It was the best I could come up with.



I wasn't jok- oh, haha! Yeah!



Conor put on a psychotic face, but I wasn't afraid.



Yeah, I don't think I'm really into her though.

Note: I know it looks like it, but this isn't how you get the different endings in Sprung. Your object here is to still woo Becky - not decide on Erica or Kiki (or neither).



There was only one way to express how I truly felt about B.



Thank you for that, Sprung.



This was it. It was time to finally reveal how I felt about her.



But then, she changed topics for no reason.



I couldn't understand it. Why was Dickbag just chanting? It was like he was handing me the contest...



OF COURSE! Conor was hypnotizing her! I had to do something! Think man, think!



So I gave her Kiki's used earplugs.



Just ignore him, Becky.

(Wait, how could she hear me?)



No.



...No, I couldn't say that, either.



Yeah, she's nice, but I'm kind of into someone else.

(Didn't we just do this?)



I'm just going to have to wait and see what the deal with Erica is.



THAT'S DIRTY POOL, DICKBAG!



Hells yeah!



The feeling's mutual.

You're on.



While I liked my "puny-ative" pun, I had a better idea.

Pepper spray!



Damn!

It really has no use in completing the game.



Dude, you knwo those pills Elliott (was I spelling that right?) gave you are laxatives, not steroids, right?



We were doing this shit, Monkey Island style! Only nowhere near as clever.



Okay, now Conor just set himself up there.



Oh, didn't you hear? They developed a vaccine for Herpes Simpelx Idiot.



That didn't even - ugh.



If you were any stupider, you'd have to be watered twice a week.



Oh yeah?



While this one was good on a couple of levels... I didn't want Becky to know I'd essentially tricked Conor into giving me a few thousand dollars.



OH! Thanks for reminding me! I forgot to clean out your mom's cage!



I didn't say anything!



In yo face! That's the second time Conor tried to lie and got caught!



Then just choose one of us.

We both closed our eyes to await Becky's decision.



And it was...



...Are... are you fucking serious?



Becky, don't be so superficial!
Excuse me?
Nice one!



QUIT POINTING YOUR FINGER GUN AT ME!
Hey Brett.
What?!



In one deft move, he'd made me look the fool!



WHAT?!!!!! But then... why did we bother- I mean what was even the point-

Anybody have a coin?



I don't think I have any change.



...Uh oh.



I had to man up and admit it. And thereby take defeat.

Yes.



Oh, right. Becky's monstrously superficial. I was set.



This was it.

This time, really. Next update... The End.

Disclaimer: For the last time, and yes, I do feel the need to say it... I am not making this shit up and none of the screencaps below have been altered in any way.

Tails.

The coin flips. As it does, my mind wanders as to what could go wrong. What if I fucked things up and we both couldn't get her pendant?



Sure!




declined.







Wait... why the hell would that happen? Shit. That was just nonsense. Maybe I needed to see a psychiatrist or something.

...



The coin flips. My mind wanders again. What if Conor won?



Note: The Tap Room is also an acceptable scene for this.



Mankind faced its greatest crisis. No, wait...













You're right, crazy inner voice in my head!

It was time to win this...

Once and for all.



The coin flipped. Becky caught it, and I had to make the most important dialogue response of my life:



It was...



Shit. Conor only needed to win once more. No matter which you pick, you always lose the first toss.



Yes. We were tied... but... I couldn't leave it up to chance. I had to do something!



Nevermind. Give it to Conor.



Becky, I don't think that you should go with either of us.



No, I couldn't say that.



This whole thing is completely juvenile. You're a woman, not a prize.



Clearly, this is how I actually felt.



This was my final challenge. I had to piece together something relatively coherent given the random-ass crap that popped into my head.

One of these...



Then one of these...



And finally one of these...



And here's what I went with.

Becky, let's head straight to the top, it's time to get up there and snatch our dreams. Sure, we may just be a couple of punks with nothing but a nickel in our shoes and some big dreams... We'll burn garbage for warmth and live in a refridgerator outside the Empire State Building if we have to!

Yes, this is the right answer if you want to beat the game.



Fuck...

Yeah!







Why did she look so shocked here?



And with that, I had all three pendants. I could take any three girls on the trip with me.

Psion posted:

You know the real end is going to be

"So Brett, who do you like?"
-Erica
-Kiki
-Becky
-Use Item

You called it.



Here's where it got tough... choosing any of the girls would piss the other two off.

If I picked Becky...





Hmmm... That was no good. If I picked Kiki...





And if I picked Erica...







None of those were acceptable...


The answer was to go with all three!



Erica, Becky, and Kiki ending portraits, respectively.

That was my story. My crazy, crazy story about how I started on a ski trip going after the woman I loved and then learned the truth.

Love wasn't about contests, or saying the right things. At the end of the day, life is just a bunch of random bullshit that makes no sense whatsoever. I hope you enjoyed my journey!

...

...

Oh my God, I posted an E/N in Let's Play. I'm such a fucking idiot!



As has been mentioned, there are bugs in Sprung that make it impossible to get all 52 pieces of artwork, and you can't 100% the items, either. I'm not lying. Even if there were a way, I'm not ever playing Brett's fucking story again.

Concept art unlocked from getting items:





Phew.

Holy shit, that got draining toward the end.

Thanks to Tasian for all the artwork, Mr. Swoon for a spin-off Flash game, and WolfShirt for a spin-off LP thread. There's more to say, and more people to thank, but it took longer than I thought it would to do the ending, and I have to get going.

And holy shit, what's the avatar count now? 40+? Christ.

For the record, I am in no rush whatsoever to do Becky's game. Hope you enjoyed this.