Part 5: Saving the world and other boring crap.
Chapter 5: Saving the world and other boring crap.
Holy shit! What was that jar made of that a gigantic axe couldn't stand up to it! I liked that axe too...
Actually, I wasn't right. I can't believe I sacrificed my axe for a goddamn baked good. Well, time to take a momentary trip back into the mansion.
In his haste, he leaves the key which he had carried with him.
Ok, that's ALMOST worth breaking my axe for. Well, whatever. Back to the lab!
The key opens this manhole type deal. In we go!
You notice that there's about five inches of tar on the ground.
There's two ways to go here, left or straight. We go straight first.
Fuck, the spider from before. Since we lost our axe ( ) we have to resort to punching it.
With predictable results. Ok, time for a different approach.
This brings me to Mysteries of Uninvited part two. This time we profile the spell Cloudisi. It doesn't do anything that I know of. If one is to cast it, clouds form around you and then disappear. You are then given a message saying that the spell took a lot out of you. Totally pointless. But I digress. Going up just takes us back to the chapel, so we backtrack and try the room on the left.
An old man appears. But, just like other old men in NES games, he's clearly insane.
See? He's crazy! Well, it's time to thaw out this room. This part is tricky if you didn't read the servants diary. But we did so we use the star on it.
Oh god! It's gonna kill me!
Oh. Weird. I'm still alive.
So this crazy old man wants me to get rid of this guy. We'll see.
Sputtering, you notice that you are in a very small cave.
Unfortunately, I trip and fall into the menacing pit.
Fuuuck. After that, I get a bit cranky. I didn't want to save the stupid world anyway! I'm outta here!
Ok, now it's ON! Get it the hell!
Ladies and gentlemen, we have saved the world. Now let's get out of here.
An ancient staircase leads you straight to a door.
Let's try the key from that demon on it.
We're back in the mansion! Now we can finally get out of here!
Oh yeah, our sister. Forgot about her. Well, let's check upstairs.
Before we find her, I have some unfinished business to attend to.
I think I can get out of here before this thing kills me now. Now it's time to find our sister. We go to the only logical place, Dracans bathroom! Wait... that's not logical at all! Well, we go there anyway.
If this was one of "those" LP's that line would be really disturbing. Anyway, I now FINALLY bring you to the most assholeish thing the game designers did. This puzzle is so illogical that it makes my head spin. To begin, we turn on the bathtub faucet.
And now we wait.
And now open the light fixture.
There. I mean REALLY. When I need to change a lightbulb, I don't FLOOD THE FUCKING ROOM to reach it. Well, let's see what's up in this weird room.
We try to talk to her.
Is she ignoring us!? How dare she! We punch her in the face!
The thing begins to speak in a low rattle. "This little one is too weak for me. I need new blood and a stronger body. I need you. I will have you. You will join us... NOW!
Our sister busts a window and hauls ass out of here.
Yeah! We'll fuck your shit up!
Well that didn't work. Let's see, what kills a demon... Hmmm, those religious types keeps going on about holy water. Let's try using our goblet full of that.
Alright! Now let's get out of this hellhole before something else kills us. But still, I don't want to go out that window. I mean look at it! There's broken glass all over! What if I cut myself! Let's go back to the bathroom instead.
Oh right. The water. Fine, I'll go out the window. But if I slash myself to ribbons it's YOUR fault!
You are surprised that the air is so mild. In fact, a warm pleasant wafts past. A bright, warm sun begins to shine through the clouds. Then you see your sister. "Sis!! Sis!! You're okay!!" You shout as you hug her!! "Of course I am, silly" your sister replies, "I just went into this mansion a couple of minutes ago." At least it seemed like a couple of minutes ago. I guess I fell asleep. Boy, what a nightmare I had!!" You hug your sister again thanking heaven above that it's all over. Your sister is now herself again. You are aware of a sense of peace and triumph. "It was a nightmare, wasn't it?" She asks hesitantly. You see fear in her eyes. With a smile, you reply, "Of course it was, sis. Just a real bad dream. "Let's go home." You say as you and your sister step into the warm, golden glow of the summer sun.
What? That's it? Nonono. That's far too happy for me. Time for me to show you the ending that Kemco-Seika was TOO AFRAID TO SHOW YOU!
I said that I'd end every update with a death and I'M NO LIAR!
And so ends Let's Play Uninvited. I hope you enjoyed it! Because if you didn't I'll have to kill myself after posting a suicide note on GBS. Anyway, my next project will most likely be Deja Vu or Shadowgate. Most likely Shadowgate since Umbilical Lotus seems to want to do Deja Vu. Hell, less work for me! Anyway, see you then!
Ah yes, almost forgot.
Death Total: 23