The Let's Play Archive

WWE 2K18

by IGgy IGsen, The LPFWA Universe

Part 8: Losers Prepare Fireworks; Winners Asplode

Episode #8 - THE END OF THE WORLD - Losers Prepare Fireworks; Winners Asplode - (Twitch VOD)
As of the time of this posting the YT version is still uploading, but the twitch version is live. If you want slightly better quality and timestamps in the description you gotta wait for a bit.

We had quite a few Title Acronyms this time, I probably missed some but here's the ones I could still find.
Losers Prepare Fireworks; Winners Asplode (Rather Watch Them)
Lesbians Power Flirting With Attacks (DCB)
Lady Prevents Finishers. What an Asshole! (Rather Watch Them)
Last Performance For Wretched Annum (nine-gear crow)
Leathery Pomp Fondles Wiseau's Area (nine-gear crow)

IGgy IGsen posted:

Next show will be on the 30th at the usual time.
It will be a PPV called THE END OF THE WORLD (tm)

You can get in predictions and vote who gets to go against Ric Flair

#1 Hardcore Match
Link vs. Lore Convoluter

#2 Table Elimination
DCB vs. Lady of the Lancet vs. Samus Aran

#3 Bunny Championship :3
Schir vs. Palpatine

#4 LP Superstar Title Match
Toad vs. A tree

#5 Co-Comm Title Match, No Count-Out.
Frederick Hope and Flamander vs. oRa 66

#6 Last Man Standing
Dash Rendar vs. IGgy IGsen

#7 Kawaii Title Match Hell-Ena in a Cell-Ena
Hell-Ena vs. Valerie Easton

#8 LPFWA Title Match
Fruitsniffer vs. nuffkinsVEVO

#0 LPFWA vs. The Universe
Victim of the Vote vs. Ric Flair

Rather Watch Them posted:

"Hell-Ena... I'm going to be honest, you seem really upset. Is it because you don't have this belt? Because you do have your own belt, and have defended it many times already. Why don't we talk about it? I think what you need now is some free expression."
And I'm going to cast Charm Person on her.
(sigh) Roll for it.

We see Valerie and what appears to be actor-turned-wrestler-turned-staff Rather Watch Them playing Dungeon's & Dragons. Val takes an impractical-looking die and casts it over the map laid out on the bench.

Plus eight... 21!
Hell-Ena's eyes soften. "Raaaaugh. Valerie, I didn't think you understood. Does coffee sound good?" But, y'know, backwards.
"It would be my pleasure." Wow, that turned out better than I thought. Now I just need to lure her to the trap and she'll be defeated for good.
Just make sure she hits the mark. I can't make the X any bigger or the audience will see it.
I don't need an X. It's magic.
And you're still going to fight her, right? This is a pay-per-view... You have to fight her.
I know! Just...

She motions for the camera crew to back away. They continue filming from outside the locker room.

I think she's actually a demon. Did you see what she did to DCB?
I only watch the parts that I'm involved with, so no.
We might need to rally the rest of the Women's Division against her. She's an actual monster. She could really hurt somebody if we don't get her to calm down a little. You know, I haven't seen her break character since the show started.
God, I hate method acting...
I'm going to go do some training... Actual training, not the witch stuff.

Val shudders and exits, and Rather briefly flashes his million-dollar smile to the camera before the door slams shut.

Danaru posted:

"Can't believe I just got out of the hospital... I'm starting to thing that guy wasn't actually a doctor"


"Ow! How did a flyer hit me in the face?! There shouldn't be a breeze on the moon! What the hell is this..."

"Wait... didn't I get my ass kicked alongside that one guy...? I think I should see an actual doctor, hell I even remember a TREE kicking my ass. I think I have brain problems."
"But more importantly, an entire SOCIETY of masked men, probably fighting for Justice?! I've got some URGENT phone calls to make!"

"Wait where did my phone go? I swear to god if that tree stole my phone, it's lucky it broke my chainsaw into eight pieces."

"...Actually if that tree stole my phone, maybe I should just get a new one. My spine still feels pretty liquified..."

Strange Forest posted:

There is a tree standing in the middle of a field. There is a cat stuck in it with a note in its mouth. The note reads:

So I'm fighting some sort of mushroom? Very well, I shall easily destroy it like my previous opponents, since my power level grows at this time of year. Also, someone really needs to get this cat.

Match Results posted:

#1 Hardcore Match
Link vs. Lore Convoluter
Link Suplexes Lore so hard the ring breaks. Let's call it a no contest, I guess.

#2 Table Elimination
DCB vs. Lady of the Lancet vs. Samus Aran
Lady of the Lancet eliminates DCB first then Samus. What?

#3 Bunny Championship :3
Schir vs. Palpatine
Palpy wins once more. He is now the longest reigning Bunny Champ :3

Scene: The Bunny Title :3 explodes (but remains undamaged) while Palpy is holding it. Palpy seems to be fine for a guy who just exploded. Kylo acts like he's dead, Face claims he's fine. God damnit Kylo chill out he's exploded before! I dunno.

#4 LP Superstar Title Match
Toad vs. A tree
The tree wins once more and the letter T was on the line????? I dunno if that's canon, I still need to decide

Scene: Jeff Lyfe interviews Fred Hope and Flamander

#5 Co-Comm Title Match, No Count-Out.
Frederick Hope and Flamander vs. oRa 66
It took a while but Fred Hope and Flamander took the win. Also Kylo botched a spot then immediately repeated it. And then did a backflip

#6 Last Man Standing
Dash Rendar vs. IGgy IGsen
1... 2.... 3... 4... 5... 6... (one move) 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... (one move) 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7... 8... (Finisher) 1... 2... 3... 4... 5... 6... 7... 8... 9... 10... (IGgy wins) - Let's never do Last Man Standing matches again

Scene: Jeff Lyfe interviews Valerie Easton on her match with Hell-Ena

#7 Kawaii Title Match Hell-Ena in a Cell-Ena
Hell-Ena vs. Valerie Easton
Hell-Ena is mad as fukk but Val wins again. Also love????????

#8 LPFWA Title Match
Fruitsniffer vs. nuffkinsVEVO
Nuffkins does not understand the concept of hugs and headbutts Fruity. Then Nuffkins does the Nuffkins move and wins.

#0 LPFWA vs. The Universe
Tommy Wiseau vs. Ric Flair
Tommy Wiseau fought out of two Figure 4s and escaped one via rope break. But then Ric Flair grabbed Tommy's dick and went for the pin. If you wanna beat the man you gotta beat the man and Ric Flair is still the man.

#B1 Foit me m7
IGgy as Big Boss Man vs. Jumpy as The Miz
IGgy does two DDTs and somehow gets the pin

After the show...

Kadorhal posted:

Well... damn. I guess nothing lasts forever, but still... I was getting used to always having the belt. All three of us had one in some form. Oh well, we'll always get another shot later. Right, boss?

... Boss? Where'd you go?

Meanwhile, in an unknown location...

I knew there was something odd about that version of Ric Flair as he appeared in 1991 showing up in the 2020s... and this one photograph will definitely prove it.

Ric Flair from '91 is of the Cabal! This changes everything!

DivineCoffeeBinge posted:

Gonna get that first win sometime! You just wait and see!

Also, great job, Val!

Rather Watch Them posted:

Thanks, DCB... That was quite a match, wasn't it? I need to figure out how to wear two belts now, huh? I'll just be in the locker room...

Valerie closes the door and leans against it, biting her lower lip.

I guess the charm spell worked after all. Couldn't really find the mark for that trap, but it all fell into place after that first kiss... of Death, of course. I hope she doesn't get even more angry, once she finds out she was tricked...

Val glances at the vandalized poster of herself, hanging on the far wall.

Or was she?

Val reaches into her locker, retrieves her phone and plays a cheerful tune while she lounges on the bench.

Did I leave my candles on?

Tevery Best posted:

Excellent. The wheels have been set in motion, The Plan is now underway!
Surely, that cryptic remark would provoke interest from someone else, but as I am talking aside, I don't need to explain anything just yet. Because it's just me. With no audience.
But if I am to proceed with Phase Two, I am going to need some better bookings. That guy would have been twice my weight if he wasn't made of Hyrulian limestone.
The fans and audience already love me, I can tell, because of my impeccable technique and thrilling stage presence. But I need to find someone with connections. Someone with pull backstage.
I may be the Planet Zeist Heavyweight Champion forever, but this does not mean much here. Yet.
Oh, what's this? A leaflet?

Doesn't look like time was too kind to it. But the man does reference the notorious Gucci Gang of Planet Morioh Wrestling Federation. And I did always feel like there is no difference between gin and saч, the staple alcohol of Planet Rendaria.
Speaking of. I wonder if he is one of the Rendars. Maybe a distant relative.
Yes, this looks like a man with backstage connections and pull with management. I should give him a call. This is a bad idea, but for reasons I would only know outside of kayfabe, and since wrestling is real, there is no such thing as "outside of kayfabe."

Lore dials a number on his Power Glove and makes a hand phone.

Hello? Yes? May I speak to Mr Rendar?