Part 67: Episode LVIX: Display My Ignorance

Music: Enemy Attack



Alright, I've got some issues with everything happening right now that I feel I need to air. First of all, the Al Bhed are trying to capture Yuna. We'll just ignore that nobody never actually went “the hell is even the deal with doing that” to Rikku at any point since she joined. We're past that. The point is they're attempting to kidnap someone by attacking their position with a tank. While they're still in it. That's like trying to initiate a hostage rescue by ordering an air-strike in the building they're housed in.

Beyond just the tank being the method of kidnapping, we've got the fact they drove a FUCKING 10 TON TANK onto a frozen lake. No part of this plan is well thought out or planned. But here we are contending with it. Meet the Crawler.



The Crawler's first order of business is launching a drone called the Negator which emits a powerful anti-magic field disabling the party's magical capabilities while active.



This is one of the primary gimmicks of this battle. And this battle does have a few. I really didn't pick the best stop to pick up this game after several years, since this battle can be a bit rough. The Crawler hits like a... well a goddamn tank, has armor defenses against physical blows and most magic (besides Thunder which it has a weakness toward), and has a very healthy 16,000 HP what with being a goddamn tank.



The first order of business should be disabling the Negator. The Al Bhed's UAV only has 1000 HP. The trouble is it is a flying enemy so everyone's physical attacks outside of Wakka are helpless to swat the thing down. On top of that there's the whole no magic thing so Lulu and Yuna are pretty much worthless until a button is put on that. Auron is all physical attacks so he's on the bench too. Kimahri I guess could use Lancet...? Pfft. Sure.

Unless we get lucky with a critical strike, Wakka needs to burn through 2/3 turns of lobbing sports balls at the thing to take it down.





Alternately, we can have Rikku pitch in with her item use to just toss a grenade at the problem and hope for the best. Hey, it worked for Solid Snake when dealing with tanks.



While Negator is active, the Crawler only has a single default attack in Gatling Gun. Where it will err... fire its gatling gun hitting the entire party 6-8 times randomly for 200-300 HP of damage each blow. The Gatling Gun attack has really poor accuracy and abilities like Tidus' Cheer and the like (abilities don't count as magic) can help to evade blows.



When the Negator is destroyed we move onto the primary phase of the battle where we begin our assault on the tank proper now that magic is back on the table.



Now is Lulu's time to shine with Thundara spells. They'll bite out around 2,000 HP out of the mechanical beast. Other party members that happen to have Thunder magic equipped on their weapons (unlikely unless you know what's coming given the previous area was nothing but lightning absorbing enemies) can contribute. Otherwise the rest of the party is pretty much there for healing, buffs, and moral support for Lulu.



The Al Bhed won't take Lulu's electrical nonsense lightly, however. Every spell cast on Crawler will result in it counter-attacking Lulu by ramming her for a good 700-800 HP of damage. Her being a squishy mage means there's only 2-3 rounds she can take from that kind of abuse before taking a dirt nap. And we kind of don't want to use healing magic here. Or really any magic beyond Lulu's Thundara. For you see, there's another gimmick involving magic beyond the drone blocking it.





Every fourth magic spell cast will result in the crawler deploying a brand new Negator into the battle and bringing us back to square one with the anti-magic field business. So there's that to take into consideration.



When the Negator is disabled things aren't all peachy. Beyond counter-attacking magic, Crawler will now uses the next four turns to count down its ultimate attack: The Mana Beam.





The Mana Beam is just a giant laser cannon that will sweep the entire party hitting for 1500-2000. It's a bad time for everyone involved. The only way to avoid the Mana Beam is to either (obviously) destroy the Crawler before it fires. Or else use four magic spells to force it into redeploying the Negator, which will in turn disable the Mana Beam from firing. Yes, they brought a tank that deploys drones that disable magic and a main cannon that runs on magic energy. Nothing about this vehicle was very well thought out.



That's about all there is to be said about the Crawler battle. Just maintaining a balance of firing off enough Thundara spells before the Mana Cannon can fire, disabling the drone, rinsing and repeating and hoping things don't go real bad with timing.







RIP another crew of Al Bhed war machine pilots. Wakka might be the only one actively racist toward the Al Bhed. But the fact his comrades have murdered more of them than any other non-monster race in Spira probably might start raising a few eyebrows after a while.





We get a nice chunk of AP, Gil, and loot from our defeat of the latest Al Bhed shenanigans. I need to remind myself to go check what the hell was going on in my Sphere Grid in the past because hell if I remember.


New Music: Fog Sea





Uhh... You're welcome, dickweed. Is nobody going to go along with Tromell this time around. The guy fucked up escorting Yuna literally within seconds of being left in his care. You people are just the worst at your jobs.





[I will tell Father!]



[I am the guardian of Yuna, you see?]
“Fa femm kiynt ran! Cra ec cyva!" [Yuna is safe! We will guard her!]



[You do this alone, sister!]

The Al Bhed leader runs off...



*nervous laugh* “I told him I was a guardian. Well, guess I had to, really."
"How come you speak Al Bhed?”



“Uhh... Well... guha...”
*sigh* <I have seen that look before. This is all about to get very offensive...>



*to Tidus and Lulu* "You knew?
*nods*
“Why didn't you tell me?"
"We knew you'd be upset."
”...Kinda thought you'd catch on sooner. I mean she has the spiral eye thing going on and all. Err... No offense. Is that offensive...? That sounds offensive.”
“So what?”
“...Isn't that an Al Bhed thing? I mean I have never seen an Al Bhed until like a month ago and even I figured out that. Err... That is an Al Bhed thing, right...?”
“It is.”
*nods* “It's why we wear the goggles...”
“...”
“...So what!?”
“This is great. I can't believe I've been traveling with an Al Bhed! A heathen!"
"You're wrong! We have nothing against Yevon."
"But you Al Bhed use the forbidden machina! You know what that means?”



"You got proof? Show me proof!"
<And here we go...>



"It's in Yevon's teachings! Not that you'd know!"
"That's not good enough! Yevon says this, Yevon says that. Can't you think for yourself?"
”Yevon's teachings say I don't gotta as long as I have faith.”
"Well, then you tell me! Where did Sin come from, huh?"
"I...I don't know!"
"You bad-mouth Yevon and that's all you can come up with?"
”I didn't even bad-mouth Yevon. I just said maybe you should think for yourself a tiny bit outside what's written in some old books.”
“Blasphemy!”
"But...that doesn't mean you should do whatever they say without thinking! Nothing will ever change that way!"
"Nothing has to change!"
"You want Sin to keep coming back? There might be a way to stop it, you know!"
"Sin will be gone once we atone for our past mistakes!"
“When? How?"



”Going to just continue keeping the course for a thousand years of that not really doing anything, huh?”
“Yevon works in mysterious ways. It's not for us to know. A heathen like you wouldn't understand.”
"Why do I even bother?"
"Rikku! "
“Hm?”



*runs over* “Yes!”
“We're not using that, are we?”



"Come on, Wakka..."
"What?"
”Auron is just...”
“Cold, tired of walking, and I don't care about Yevon. If you would like to argue religious doctrine, there's a snow drift over there that will listen.”
"...”
"I mean, getting angry just 'cause you found out Rikku's an Al Bhed... You guys got along just fine till now, didn't you?"
"That's different. I mean..."
”She... She could be putting on an act. What about that thing with the thunder? Ain't heard of no grease monkeys being afraid of electricity what with their precious machina.”
“...You also hadn't heard of the single weird physical trait they have until three minutes ago either.”
“Hmph! Well, I can't be wasting my time with knowing about stupid things like the Al Bhed.”
"Well, I don't claim to know that much about Spira. And I probably know even less about the Al Bhed, but...I know Rikku's a good person. She's just Rikku!"
"Lu?"



"Ha!"



Wakka decides he's going to walk the rest of the way to Macalania Temple by himself. No doubt to brood about how that rotten Al Bhed Rikku stole that sixth guardian position on the team from a hard working Yevonite they just hadn't encountered yet.

Oh well. Fuck him. He'll get over it. Or die of hypothermia.



"You've done nothing to apologize for."
”Wakka is just... Erm...”
“...Little bit racist?”
“I like the guy but... yeah.”
*grunts* <Wakka not even know funny jokes about Al Bhed. How many Al Bhed it take to change in a light bulb? Zero because they all smited by Sin for using forbidden machina. How that even supposed to be joke?>
“...I was going to say... 'passionate' about his faith. But yes. Wakka is not the most open-minded person I know.”
"All right! Let's ride!"



*flips over a snowmobile *
"Better than Kimahri does!”



Whatever, dude. Kimahri knows what he's doing. He's sick of you humans' shit and is just fucking OUT!



Hey, remember that “Affection” mechanic I mentioned ages ago and touched on a few times? The one where performing certain actions in dialogue and healing people in combat and such would raise an unseen stat dictating a few scenes. Well this right here is the primary point in the game where you get a completely different scene depending on who has the highest affection at this point. Discounting Yuna who has already taken off on foot, hopefully without another kidnapping attempt or Sin Spawn ambush or the like. And Wakka, his is having a bigotry brooding session.

Whoever between the remaining Lulu, Rikku, Auron, and Kimahri likes Tidus the best will now share a unique conversation for the drive to the next area. In our case, the winner is...



Rikku! Not sure how that worked out. But I reckon hitching a ride with the simple but friendly enough Tidus is probably her safest bet after the previous simple but seemingly friendly enough guy just blew up in her face like a jackass.




Music: Fantasy



"He didn't have to be so mean, yeah? _{I almost cried}."
“Uh... Rikku?"



"It's okay. At least you're still nice.”
”Yeah well, you've been pretty cool. I mean... other than the time you gun-whipped me and forced me into undersea labor. And the time you tried to kill me in that river. And your brother just tried to kill me with some kinda tank. I guess that last one isn't on you...”
*nervous laugh* “Yeah... Super sorry...”
“Hey, do I look like Yunie, you think?”
“Huh?”
”...Err. Not... really? Like... at all? I mean you're both cute, don't get me wrong. It's ju—“



"Hmm. Ah. I had no idea! If you say so.”
“Mmm-hmm.”
”Say, I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess Wakka doesn't know Yunie is half-Al Bhed, right?”
“And people say I ask a lot of dumb questions. I think you already know the answer to that one.”
*nervous laugh* “Sheesh. That's going to be a great drama bomb one of these days.”
“Okay! I guess you're guarding your family, then."
"Yuna's not the only one that I want to protect. We Al Bhed want to protect all of the summoners, you know? Summoners are... Well, you could say that... they sacrifice themselves to, well... to bring happiness to Spira."



“Oh.”
“Rikku?"
"Yes?"
"'Sacrifice themselves'"?
”...”
“You know what I mean. ...Right?”
“Huh?”
“The whole suic—someone has told you what happens at the end of Yuna's journey, right...?”
“Yeah. Get to Zanarkand. Defeat Sin. Duh.”
“And what happens to Yunie...?”
“Yeah. I guess they'll have to make a buncha statues out of her like her dad. Sounds like a pain in the butt to pose for or whatever.”
“...Oh. Geez.”
<Yeesh. Yuna did not pick the brightest guardians here.>
“What were you saying?”
"You know, the pilgrimage...It takes a lot out of you."
"Oh, right! But you know. Yuna's real serious about being a summoner. For Yuna, well the pilgrimage kinda means everything to her. You are going to help her, too, aren't you, Rikku?"
"..."
"So you shouldn't say that Yuna's sacrificing herself."

Rikku hugs Tidus...







And that ends the solitary “long” unique cutscene dictated by Final Fantasy X's affection mechanic. Yep. That was it. There's like a 30 second bit later on and one animation for Tidus' Overdrive is slightly different. Square had good resource allocation priorities back in the day.






Video: Episode 59 Highlight Reel





Crawler Concept Art