Part 1

Hey fuckers, I'm not dead, and I'm still the life of the party. As I'm sure you can tell by now, this update's going to be a little different, since we're doing item collection. And boy howdy, is item collection fucking boring (also, by all means, skip this update if you're not interested, because I honestly can't think of a way to make this interesting). This is actually only the first part of it, where we take down the Secret Seashells.





Jumping right in, this'll be the first Secret Seashell we get (second overall), in the Mysterious Forest. This one can't be gotten until after you get the Power Bracelet L-1, since the narrowly spaced entrance is blocked off by a rock.



In Madam Meow-meow's doghouse housing the materialistic chain-chomp, you can find the next seashell by digging in the bottom right corner with the shovel.





The next one's located here, near where the Nostalgic Ghost's grave is, underneath the bush which is very obviously placed so as to draw attention to it. After cutting down the bush, dig where it was to unearth the seashell. That's four!







For the next one, it's back to Tail Cave and into the incredibly obvious bombable wall that I skipped the first time round.

Unfortunately, if you're finding this to be pretty samey, therein lies the problem with collecting seashells, there's really nothing even remotely challenging in finding them if you know the area to look in, or even stumbling upon said area.





The next seashell's located here, next to Tail Cave. By running into this sole tree with the Pegasus Boots, you'll knock the shell loose.





Just south of the entrance to Ukuku Prairie, this tree follows the same standard of the last one, where running into it knocks a shell loose. These are actually the only two items in the game that you get by running into a tree with the Pegasus Boots, as far as I know.









"I'll tell you a secret! Use your sword to poke at dungeon walls... If you hear a hollow clank, you can break the wall with a bomb!"

This lovely talking tree is found right outside the Seashell Mansion, our ultimate destination once we collect enough seashells. The Mansion is found by going south on the path to Kanalet Castle, west, and then north, as indicated in the screenshots. Why are we going to the Mansion when we only have five seashells? Well...







Walking through the goal posts gives us a measurement of how far along we are for the seashell collection. Once you have exactly five, too, it rewards you with a free seashell! There's another seashell prize for ten shells, though nothing for 15, and 20 is when something good is bound to happen.





One screen to the right of the Mansion is this set of bushes with a seashell obscured by the one in the upper-right corner.





This one's located very near to Key Cavern, the third dungeon. If you remember the little spots of land that you jumped across to get to the dungeon entrance, this spot is just one screen north of that. Funny thing about this shell is that you have to hit or pick up the bush from the north, otherwise the shell will just fall in the water. First time that happened to me, I lost my shit because I figured I just lost a seashell for good, but it respawns if you leave the screen and come back, obviously.



Up that flight of stairs on the left side of the last set of screenshots, you'll find another super fucking obvious seashell. I ended up slashing away the grass on the right side, but the shell is located in the middle of them all underground.



This area's located to the south of the path that leads you to the Seashell Mansion. Go one more screen south and...



You'll find another seashell hidden under an out of place rock.



One screen to the left of the last one, you'll find the entrance to this cave, which leads up to the next seashell.

Can I just say, for the record, that I fucking hate the floating bomb enemies? They're called Bombers, and they seem to exist just to piss me right the hell off. Their bombs hit for a full heart of damage, and it's nearly impossible to hit them with the sword, since they dodge quickly if you swing while close to them. Most of the damage I took in this session was because of these fuckers.







This is the inside of the cave. All the skulls on the ground have Spiny Beetles under them, which means they make a beeline straight for you if you enter their line of sight. The way to the seashell lies in the bombable wall here which leads to a flight of stairs leading to another small cave section.



A positively thrilling rock pushing puzzle awaits, and if you can work your brainmeats enough to figure out how to push a rock properly, the seashell is very near, just outside the cave.







An owl statue awaits, choosing to forgo its usual tactic of "incomprehensible bullshit" and just straight up tells us that there's something in the area. After digging for a bit, you'll find the seashell very near to the statue.



Going south at the area with the bombable wall inside the cave brings you out here, and going south a bit brings us back to the main part of Martha's Bay.





Near this golden mermaid statue is another super obvious bush shell. Speaking of super obvious bush shells,



Here's another one. Near the south of Martha's Bay is where this is located, and all you need is the flippers. Honestly, the hardest part about this area is avoiding getting ganked by the River Zora's fireball (admittedly, I got ganked).





This bridge (we'll be seeing more of it later) leads the way to another owl statue which tells us "Secrets are like water when it comes to bridges," which seems like an unnecessarily cryptic way to say "Look under the bridge." Digging next to it gets us another shell.



If you remember the Nostalgic Ghost segment, it tells us to check under a pot in its house before it goes to its eternal rest. Once you do this, you'll find yet another seashell (we're almost done!).





Here's the last seashell, thankfully! In the Yarna Desert, after you fall in the sandpit and escape through the cave, go due south a few screens, and you'll find two rocks. The seashell is located under one of them, and we're done! Now, back to Seashell Mansion to collect our prize.













"You got a new sword! You should put your name on it right away!"

Our prize is the level 2 sword. It's twice as strong as the level 1, and when you're at full health, it fires beams that do damage equal to the level 1 sword, although they're stopped by anything that Link cannot walk through, including bushes.

Some notes now that I'm done with this part:
-The heart pieces update will come later and it is, mercifully, much shorter than this one. There's still some heart pieces which I can't acquire until I have later items.
-Tell me what you think about the colors, I just switched around the settings for this session, I don't know if people prefer the original, brighter colors or the new, more muted tones.
-I have much, much more respect for people who do SSLPs after slogging my way through writing this garbage.

That's all for now, see you guys for the next update which is, thankfully, back to video!