Part 29: How to Kill a Camel
Operation: Camel Eater [May 8th, 10006|12:10 pm]
[Current Mood| I can not believe it]
[Current Music|Sufjan Stevens - I don't know all his songs alike]
The votes when I made my decision overwhelmingly went to Mandy. I had Colt drop Solid off at Errow's for power training, while I sat around watching sassy judges on daytime TV.
Your monster's first trial was, of course, to survive a sand storm.
I must admit, I was quite surprised that your monster was not blown into another continent.
Even more surprisingly, he managed to pass the course. Albeit, with diminished returns.
Trial the second is to awaken and pass by Ollie, the sleeping camel. Most normal monsters on this course will use fisticuffs on our camel to snap it awake.
Yours chose a more, shall we say, direct method to crossing Ollie's path.
Rest assured, we will be billing you for a replacement camel. "Solid Waste" also happened to pick up a new attack during his dismemberment frenzy.
Trial the third: Remove the rock plugging up this oasis.
I will not say that your monster planted explosive charges at the base of the rock, but... Actually, that is exactly what I am saying. Your monster blew up our rock with C4 instead of his fists. Most unsportsmanlike.
The final trial is to simply survive the Ant Lion. We haven't named it yet, and are open to suggestions.
That is to say, we will be open to naming suggestions for our new ant lion, once we replace the one your monster ate. Why would he even eat a giant insect? There is something decidedly wrong with your monster.
After finishing his ant lion meal, "Solid Waste" was ambushed by one of our wanted monsters. This one has a higher bounty due to its taste for burning our offices with its eye laser.
Though your monster put up quite the fight, he was soundly licked by Heat Eye. I am not so much disappointed by his loss as I am that he still lives.
You do that again, and I will stuff you in a suitcase and throw it off the nearest bridge.
Or so the report said. Let's see what Solid learned.
It's no neck snap, but it'll do for now.
And now, all we need to do is figure out what training regimen we'll be putting Solid on next. That's your job, internet, so get crackin'.