Part 56: Ducking A Cup
That was pretty messed up [Jun 26th, 1014|6:57 am]
[Current Mood| on top of the world]
[Current Music|Stevie Wonder - Superstition]
It's time for the big tournament. We made our last-minute preps and hit the A Cup.
Giant foam finger?
Then let's dope up Ducken and go do this thing!
Not even the insane ramblings of that announcer guy could dampen my mood. We were set to destroy all.
Starting with... A naked girl with cat ears. Um. Yeah.
Ducken bombed the hell out of her, and we moved on. Very, very quickly. That girl was making me feel very uncomfortable.
Up next was a snake-man dressed up like a super hero.
Did we go to a comic convention by mistake?
I... don't think so.
Check again. I'm not about to get sued by some insane geeks.
Ducken, in his drug-addled state, went crazy. He began shooting lasers all over the arena. I didn't even know he could shoot lasers in the first place.
One blinded some guy, another actually managed to hit the whitesnake in the face.
And then the face disappeared. A victory for all! Other than the blind guy, I mean.
I can't say I was expecting this. There was someone else in this world who loved duckens like I do. We hugged, and then set our duckens out to kill each other.
Ducken started his wonderful dance. Caplan accompanied. Colt, Caplan's trainer and I all joined in. It... it was beautiful.
The judges awarded Ducken the win for starting such a glorious dance craze.
Our next opponent was a giant robot scorpion.
Let me say that again. Ducken has to fight a giant. Robot. Scorpion.
How is that even legal!?
Well, it's sort of a monster, I guess.
Cut that rationalization out!
One hit from the robot's massive claw, and Ducken was almost out for good.
But when your ass is made out of napalm, you don't really have to worry too much about giant robots.
Take THAT, science!
Finally, Ducken had to face a blue whale with legs. With feathers. I think I might have accidentally sampled some of Ducken's drugs.
Still, Ducken was in a frenzy and bit right into the whale's dork.
...And then he blew it up. That sort of took the fight out of the monster.
But with that, we won! I've gained another trainer rank. It won't be much longer until I can quit this monster raising game.
Wait, what? Five?!
Yeah. Each of the Big Four tournaments has its own rank attached to it. And those only come after you beat the S Cup.
I think I need to be alone right now.
Going to cry?
Yes. A lot.
Help me make Ducken beat everything, people. And fast.