The Let's Play Archive

Soul Nomad

by Feinne

Part 63: Lost Chapter- Lujei Piche

Lost Chapter- Lujei Piche

With all the tragedy surrounding Euphoria's death, I almost forgot to write about the strangest incident we ever encountered in our journey. But now, long after the fact, I think it's time to write about that time we battled a crazy time witch.

This all occurred the night before Euphoria's death. It's just one more reason I'll never forget that day if I live a thousand years.


Hey, look! Look! After chasing him all over, we finally ended up somewhere pretty!
Ohh... sooo pretty...
First it was that tough, pointy canyon. Then it was that dead, dirty desert. Praise to the Maple Demon!
Praise to the chilling ice that shines and dances across the Sea of Aphrodite!
Don't you agree, my love?

Aww... are you jealous? That's so cute! Hmhmhm...
Are you mad at Lujei for chasing after a cute boy that wasn't you?
Or maybe you're jealous that I can go chasing and you can't.
How delightful! Lujei loves to see you jealous!
Eerie Staff: Lujei... ahh, Lujei, when will you learn?
You don't understand. I just don't want you to mess with this world the way you did with all those others.
I think back on what you did to them, and I can't help but feel bad for the people of this world.
You're just so nice, my love! That's why I love you!

Lujei won't ever forgive that naughty little boy who wanted to destroy our beautiful Aphrodite!
Lujei's gonna protect this world from all those nasty bugs!
All Lujei wants to do is spend forever and forever with her love.
You understand?
Eerie Staff: *sigh* I understand, Lujei. I understand very well...

Endorph was at the Raide Oceanside. This Lujei woman seemed to be chasing after him, like they knew each other.

!!! Wh-who...?
Oh, Little Walnut! Waah, it's been so long!
Huh? You look different from before... Did you get fat? You were thinner, more handsome last time.
Lujei lost 700 pounds on the mouth-stitching diet! You should try it!
You're... the time witch!
What are you doing here? What happened to Sulpher?!
Cellar? What's that? Some kind of medicine? Or maybe it's your invisible friend!
Do you have any idea, my love?

Ohh yeah! Our cute, jabby little friend!
He looked like he was in trouble, so Lujei pulled the old 'Good Boy Bad Boy' routine!
After Lujei helped young Wally here, she played good boy paddy cake with your bony friend and sent him back home!
Lujei's such a helpful girl! She deserves an award!
You sent him back to Ivoire...? How could you?!
Oh, don't you worry! He seemed really happy when I sent him away. Hehe!
Then why did you send me here? Why didn't you send me back to Ivoire?!

So why are you here now, time witch?
Ya see, Li'l Wally, it's your turn to come over to my place! You ready to play?
Maybe we could play stab-stab burn-burn surgery! Or what about hack-hack kill-kill butcher?!

It was then that Danette ran in. Euphoria had collapsed, near death.

Calm down and tell me what's wrong! Did something happen?
Endorph! Euphoria's in trouble! We think she has... Scarlet Iago!
It may already be too late! We have to hurry!
Awww! Li'l Wally ran away!
Sh-she just collapsed. She's not breathing...
She... she's really sick.
But I've never seen it spread this fast. There's a chance it may be some sort of poison.

It turns out there's certain words you shouldn't say near crazy ghost time witches. Who knew?

Eerie Staff: No... master? Master, wake up!
Poison...? Poi...son...?
Eerie Staff: This is not good. You have to get out of here, quick!
What's going on?!
Pooooison! POOOOISON!!!

Danette ran off to get me at this point, because things were clearly getting out of hand.


Lujei's staff crackled with electricity, but as far as we could tell it was just to hurt whatever entity was in it talking.

You unfaithful wretch! How dare you show yourself in front of me?!
Eerie Staff: M-master...! I'm sorry!
You dirty... disgusting... Detestable... demon!
You two-faced monster... you killed the great witch, Lujei Piche! You must pay for your impudence!
Eerie Staff: M-master! P-p-please forgive me!
If it weren't for you, I could have stayed in that tower forever! You flea-ridden lapdog of the government!

That's when we showed up.

If you hadn't betrayed me, I could have continued my grand experiments!
You've filled me with hatred from the depths of my heart to the tips of my fingers...!
Eerie Staff: Gyaaahhh!!!
Stop it! You're hurting him!
Hurting? HURTING?! You know nothing of hurt! This pig feels no pain!
Lujei Piche is the greatest witch to ever live. She doesn't need your mindless opinions!

Lujei teleported Danette somewhere else. We never found out exactly where, Danette didn't want to talk about it.

It seems even disgusting flies are attracted to the ice of Aphrodite.
You disappoint me...
A false Aphrodite... you shall shatter and glitter as you fall, before melting away into the muddy water that you are!

Lujei prepared for a mighty attack, but she clearly didn't know who she was messing with.

What the hell is this bitch ranting about?
Listen, I have no idea what the hell you are, but I can tell you're itching for a fight. Well so am I!
Hey, kid! You gonna get her back for what she did to the stupid cow, or what?
Hell yeah!
Listen, you crazy bitch. You just made the biggest mistake of your crazy-bitch life.
And that is...
You got on my wrong damn side!!!

And so we engaged the great witch, Lujei Piche.


Lujei was nowhere near as powerful as we were, but the strange creatures she summoned to attack were still quite dangerous.

Still, the outcome was never in doubt.

Feinne on Soul Nomad:

Okay, so Lujei's a very easy extra stage. She's of about the same level as stuff in the section of game she's in. Lujei herself comes with an Antimatter décor, which is annoying but just makes it take a bit longer to kill her.

Lujei is a character from Grim Grimoire. That's about all I've got on her, and since I haven't finished that game I don't really want to spoil it for myself. I will say that the presence of a crazy time witch in said game makes a lot of sense if you know anything about it. She's how Walnut got here. She and Walnut are talking about something that is relevant to the ending of Phantom Brave yet doesn't really spoil anything meaningful.

Now that we have Lujei, she's in the main character's room forever. This is because Lujei is awesome in every way. She's one of two character types with an INT based front rank attack (the other is Schemestress type characters including Kanan), she's got a powerful middle rank attack, and she's got a whole squad INT based back rank attack, which is what we'll be using because it's insane.

I'll make a video showing off all her abilities, because they're pretty cool. All her attack modes are Grim Grimoire Sorcery units, from the little imps you saw to the dragon she calls as her skill.

Lujei didn't take losing that well.


Ow ow owww! That huuurt!
Hey, what're you doing? Lujei is not happy! She's gonna go home!
Hehe. Sure, go ahead and try. Of course, we'll just summon you right back.
Grr...! Nobody likes a bully!
Be nice to me, or else you won't get any dinner! Or snacks!
And I'm not gonna let you play with Mevy, either! Aaand I'm never, ever gonna invite you to my birthday party!
Grr...! You're just a... a poo-poo head! And a wee-wee face! And a stupid potato brain!
And your mom has a big butt! So there!
Eerie Staff: L-Lujei... that's enough.
... Holy hell, lady. Maybe we won't summon you.

Yeah. I don't get what happened either. But that's how a crazy ghost time witch joined us.