The Let's Play Archive

The Bard's Tale

by Stabbey_the_Clown

Part 30: Chapter 7-03

No, there was no Bad Luck song. But we'll be seeing one realtively soon. This update was oddly hard because despite the cutscenes, there's nothing really interesting about the tower.

Chapter 7-03

The Bard headed into the second level of the tower. The main passage lay ahead of him, but he caught a glimpse of a dark, almost hidden side passage. But there was no time to investigate, for the Mechanical Men were upon him.

The Bard cleared the nearby ones away and looted a nearby chest before returning to the side passage.

The Bard peered into the glom and scowled. He would need to use the light fairy to explore the depths, but even so he felt he should take extra precautions. He summoned the Explorer.

Sure enough, the side passage was trapped.

But there were rewards as well.

And more traps.

The Bard emerged onto the main hallway once more. He was slightly unsure of the direction to take, but the large group of Mechanical Troops to the south provided a clue.

Wrong spot for a Lever

Mechanical Hoplite: Your advances are for naught! I guard this lever which controls these gates by which you cannot pass!

The Bard glanced into the nearby cubbyhole where a lever sat.

: Why do you guys always put the lever to a gate in front of the area you're trying to protect? Try putting it behind the gate! Next you'll be telling me that the keys to the doors are hidden in some random chests throughout the tower.

Mechanical Hoplite: There are no keys, only levers! And the lever is here because... Errr... damn me for a fool, you're right!
: Don't be so hard on yourself. I've seen it before, it's a pretty common error... Let me put you out of your misery.

Once they were all dispatched the Bard strode to the lever.

"The best part about fighting the mechanical beasties is that I don't have to clean me sword!"

The respite was short lived, for as soon as he raised the gates, a group of Mechanical Boar-Riders charged at him.

The Bard continued on into the tower, and reaching a corner, turned westwards.

He found another dark side passage, but ignored it.

Level 12
Vitality increased to 15
Rhythm increased to 16

The Bard heard a large group approaching, and shouted out "Oh no, there's too many. I must flee for my life," before doubling back to the side passage.

Once he was out if sight, the Bard watched carefully as the horde clanked their way past.

"Now, let's see if there's anything good in here," the Bard said.

The Bard had a clear passage through the other end of the shortcut, but he soon encountered a new obstacle, another barred gate. This time, however, the lever was on the far side.

But the foes beyond the bars were not Mechanical Men, but Mechanical WOmen.

Mechanical Women - Snarky

Mechanical Women - Nice

: Waiting for the Bard of your dreams to wander by, Ladies?

Maeve: Certainly, we've been waiting for you, waiting to keep you away from this lever.

There's nothing to be gained here. Being nice gets you mocked, Snarky gives you a clue.

The Bard tried the same tactic that had worked on Cathbad - he tried to goad the Mechanical Women into fighting him.

: I was getting ahead of myself when I called you ladies. Your tongue is sharp, but if you weren't hiding behind those bars I'll bet you'd sing a different tune.

The women were not easily manipulated by words, however.

Maeve: You will hear naught from us but scorn and laughter, for we are safe behind these bars and are not afraid of anything...

A not-to-bright one felt she had to interject her own two cents.

Mechanical Woman: But Maeve, what about... you know?

Maeve: I'll hear none of that talk now you silly lass. There are none of those squeekin devils left around here. Just like a man not to know when he's been beaten. Now go away.

But the damage was done. The Bard brought out his Jeweled Flute and summoned his Vorpal Rat.

The Rat eagerly raced under the gate. The Mechanical Women were creations cursed by their realism. They panicked.

Mechanical Woman: Eeek, it's a rat! I can't stand the little squeeking buggers, get me out of here!

Maeve tried to hold her troops firm.

Maeve: Be brave girl, that wee thing cannot hurt you.

Then the Vorpal Rat leapt and shattered one of the Mechanical Women into pieces instantly. That was the straw that broke their nerve.

Maeve: Curse you and your verminous allies!
: Once again the Bard oh so valiantly overcame his foes.
: It's a gift.

Experience: 1100

The Bard headed up to the third level of the tower.

The third level is bigger then the other two combined, but it's not interesting, and just as linear.

The inhabitants there were just as unfriendly as the other parts of the tower.

The Bard continued fighting his way through the tower, until he looted a chest and found something very useful indeed.

The Bard lifted the shiny new sword from the chest, and immediately dropped it after getting a mild shock.

: Ow!
: Perhaps you should consult the owner's manual.
: 'Congratulations! You have just become the proud owner of a Claidheamh Soluis Mark 1 Electric Claymore'... blah blah blah... Ah here we go, safety instructions... 'Do not point blade at face (Figure 1). Always grip blade by the hilt (Figure 2) or injuries to the hand may occur...' Yeah, I think I get it.

Damage: (9-25) -> [(12-32) + (1-5 electrical damage)]

It sure took long enough, we've been lugging this thing around since Chapter 1, and we're more then halfway through Chapter 7. The funny thing is that this weapon will only last us for at most one chapter, since we can pick up the next 2-hander in Chapter 8, so don't get attached to this one.

The Bard continued through the tower, fighting the Mechanical Menaces.

: Cue the montage!

Finally the Bard reached Lugh's Chamber.

Lugh at the Summit

: Our brave hero fought his way to the summit of the tower, and before him stood the flame that he must extinguish. Unfortunately, before that stood Lugh, who would not give in without a fight.

Lugh: You've made it I see.
: No taunts now, eh? Where's all that wit I heard down in the arena?

Lugh: I've gained a measure of respect for your fighting prowess, it saddens me that I'm going to have to kill you now.
: I wish I could say the feeling's mutual, but the cold fact is, I expect Ill quite enjoy it.

Lugh: That's the spirit!

All Movies

Wrong Spot for a Lever

Mechanical Women - Snarky

Mechanical Women - Nice

Lugh at the Summit