Part 8: Philosophical Riot
Now would be a good time to import my barehanded-master save file. Only equipment and skill books are carried over, so Kanta won’t one-shot anything.
Mission: Suppress Rioters
It’s time for some disciplinary action with my non-lethal Harisen (Slapping Fan, ATK 1)!
P-people will make fun of us nerds again. 
It’s already on the online news site.
1) What is going on ?
2) What should I do ?
3) Everyone looks excited.
What is going on ?
There’s a rumor that the store is hoarding limited edition merchandise of a certain anime. Everyone said the store is trying to jack up the rarity of the item to sell it at a high price. Nobu knows a lot more about these kinds of things, but we can’t seem to contact him… As for what happened, it seems the store ordered the wrong amount of those merchandise, which means a bunch of people aren’t getting their pre-orders. In other words, those people are the preorder customers. It is irritating to have something like this happen… What to do? There might be some in here that might want to loot things during the disorder.
No, no, they aren’t that kind of people. I know that well. … Sorry. Don’t worry about it. The restock error occurred two weeks ago, so it’s a strange thing to see this baseless rumor come out of nowhere… The storage is empty, right ? Hm. I know the shopkeeper, and he verified there is nothing… However, no one would believe with just that… The lack of confidence in the store is part of the problem. Humans prefers to believe information that they gathered themselves. It’s a tricky situation.---------------------
What should I do? Hmmm, although we have come, what can we do… Haha. We are always like this. Always charging into the scene without planning first… We have the heart, but we don’t have power nor legality. We can only watch most of the time. Yep, yep.
Ahahahaha… Is this the time to laugh? … Sorry. … I will reflect on my action. …
… I don’t dislike this kind of Vigilante. What’s important is to do something for society. Ahh… Ms. Sara is so cool. I am fully motivated by Sara’s words. But there’s not much we can do. That’s correct. Ahahahaha… … … Sorry. … I will reflect on my action.---------------------
Everyone looks excited. Yeah, I know. It’s like a festival. … Please be a little more serious. … Oh dear, oh dear.---------------------
IT Witch Maria’s limited hug pillow and breast mouse pad!
YEAHHHHHH! WE WILL NOT LET YOU SELL THE STUFF WE PREORDERED ONLINE!YEAHHHHHH! IT’S IN THE STORAGE ISN’T IT!? LET US SEE IT! YEAHHHHHH!
Not just the shop, lots of people will be arrested… … It’s a big problem. … Is it my imagination? The people who are hyping the riot don’t seem to be local. Now that you mention it, they don’t seem familiar. Could it be… Yatabe, do you have the machine from NIRO? Ah, the identifier? But this case is… It’s just a hunch. Hm, very well. Then… Hm, push this button… AH!? 
Eh? Could it be, those people… They’re… Vampires! In times like this, it’s all up to Kanta.What!? Vampire!? I can’t hurt them with this slapping fan! I left my real weapon at home!
1) Ok
2) No
No. Please, the sooner the better. We can’t do it after all… Please, Kanta. No. Kanta… … Kanta… … Kanta… No. … … Please, master. Lend us your strength. Ok. I knew you would accept! Just in case, I will contacted that agent lady. Alright, let’s do our best to control the situation. Take care.
They already started brawling with each other. Here goes nothing.
This is a lot more people than I thought. The band-clothing guy seems to be the only vampire, and he is too busy stirring up the riot than fighting.
Stop fighting, you two!
This is all a plot of the vampire!
Don’t uppercut me while I uppercutting someone! This would look silly!
God dammit! Even Au Revoir no Wee Wee is barely hurting them.
I made a terrible choice for my weapon. This is going to take forever… Unless…
I am dumping all my tungsten into this fan!
I don’t know how it happened, but Harisen +6!
Much better!
Sending the rioters back home in droves.
No sinner can withstand the wrath of the disciplinary committee. Social orders must be obeyed.
1) Do not cause a riot!
2) I know your real identity.
3) Give me the limited merchandise!
Do not cause a riot!
You dare interfere with us? Then I have no qualm in destroying you! You shall not have the limited merchandise!
Why do you stir up this riot? Answer me! It’s obvious the store failed the expectations of these customers and they have every right to be enraged!
No! This could have been resolved peacefully without your intervention! Wrong! Society always sought for peace, and yet wars still happen! What are you trying to say? That the world can never have peace?
Wrong again! There’s only one thing that can achieve true world peace! And what is that? Anime merchandise!
You mean entertainment will distract the world from killing each other? Exactly! Not only that, but people will learn love through anime hug pillow!
Then why did you caused this riot!? It is my mission! A personal mission to teach the retail industry to never under-stock their anime merchandise! You are mad! It is the fact of life! This riot proved my world theory!
NO, you are wrong! Love will preserve the peace of society and anime is the crystallization of love! 
*slowly ashing* … You might be right. It’s a shame I won’t get to see the next episode of IT Witch Maria… I will burn a whole volume to send to heaven for you. Ha, as if a vampire will ever go to heaven. Course you will. Vampire or not, anyone who love anime can’t be all bad. … I finally understand… Your meaning… Of love…-----------------
T-this kind of ‘activity’ really dissolved quickly without a leader. Well done. Would you like some tea when we return to the base?
… Nobu... Were you in the riot too?
Of course. It’s IT Witch Maria! I heard that masterpiece is releasing limited merchandise, how could a fan like me miss this! In fact, I feel bad for the store after this incident. Speaking of that, the store owner forgot to restock the proper amount of merchandise is bad form for their customers! Lucky for me, I reserved a several copies from a couple of other stores for collection and viewing pleasure. Just handing out anime cards as the apology is so disrespectfully shitty service! This store deserves this bad fortune, it’s entirely their fault! There’s mor- Ah, hm, we get it. Probably, hm, we get it. It’s fine, we got the message. … That’s why we couldn’t contact you. Umm... What’s the difference of View Only Collection and Usable Collection?
Uh, th-that… How to say this. It’s fine if it gets dirty… etcetera… Method of getting it dirty… something like that… Right, Gon? … !? D-don’t look at me… …? Well, well. Men have their own philosophical path. An-anyway, why’s everyone here? Hm, that…----
(Yatabe explained the situation to him)
Inconceivable! I was riled by those people? Impossible! This fervent voice from within my heart, it can’t be drawn out by someone else… … Ah.
Speaking of them, the chick that we saw before is wandering around here somewhere…1) Which erotic game character?
2) Vampire?
3) Enough with the excuse.
Which erotic game character?
Not 2D, I meant 3D. -----
Vampire. Hm.-----
Enough with the excuse. It’s not an excuse. I mean it! That dark haired girl… The one from when you were assaulted in the alley. She was holding you when we reached there. She seems to be with her friend, issuing some orders or something… I think I saw her going that way.